Violet Eyes

Chapter 38

Go back and reread chapter 36 before you read this one. I forgot to add a scene when I first wrote it, but I went back and added it. 

"This is stupid and I'm not doing it," I grumbled, looking at the poor, innocent pumpkin in front of me. 

After my embarrassing breakdown, Eijirou gently informed me that they couldn't let me hurt myself anymore and that I needed to find a different coping mechanism. Smashing a pumpkin to bits with a baseball bat was the best they could come up with. 

"Just hit the fucking pumpkin," Katsuki said, crossing his arms as he stared me down. 

We had taken Eijirou's truck to the same desolate lookout point where Katsuki liked to disappear. It was late and the moon was already out, our only illumination came from the truck's headlights. I was starting to get cold and irritated because their idea was stupid and I wasn't doing it. 

Hitoshi had his hood pulled up and his hands shoved in the front pocket of his sweatshirt, the temperature bothering him as well. He still looked wildly amused with my refusal though. "Just imagine it's his head." 

"Where the hell did you guys even get a pumpkin at ten o'clock on a Monday?" I asked skeptically, the bat resting over my shoulder as I glanced back at them. 

Eijirou shrugged, leaning against the front of his truck. "Sero knows a guy." 

"He knows a pumpkin guy?" 

"Apparently." 

"God, I have so many questions," I muttered, setting my sights on the orange fruit in front of me. 

"Hit the damn thing so we can leave," Katsuki called from behind me. 

I poorly mimicked him, beyond aggravated with all three of them. This was stupid, but I knew they would sit there for hours waiting for me to get it over with. 

I took a deep breath, doing what Hitoshi had suggested and picturing my father's head in place of the pumpkin. My hands shook slightly as I tightened my hold on the bat, winding it back and bringing it down hard. 

I swung again. 

And again. 

And again. 

I beat the ever-loving shit out of that pumpkin, completely decimating it as I took out all my frustration, self-loathing, and anger. My father's face and voice were all I could think about, every insult, every snide comment, every sneer, flashing through my mind as I imagined it was him I was hitting. Over and over again, showing no mercy. 

Once the bat hit solid ground, I lost my grip. It bounced back and thankfully missed me, landing harmlessly a few feet away. 

My breathing was ragged as I stared down at the destruction I had caused. That poor fucking pumpkin. 

"Feel better?" Eijirou asked in an amused voice. It had been his idea and I knew he had to be feeling pretty proud of himself. 

My hands clenched and unclenched as I took stock of my body. My arms burned slightly from the exertion, but my mind felt clear. My chest was rapidly rising and falling, but the air seemed to pass through easier than it had in days. The stupid fucking idea had actually... helped. 

"Can Sero get another pumpkin?" 

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I ended up destroying four more pumpkins before exhaustion set in and I had to call it quits. It wouldn't be long before we ended up back there, a bat in my hand and something else to beat in front of me, so I accepted defeat for the night.