I hate these people.
They're so fake.
And when they're not, they're outright repulsive.
I hate people today. No, I don't want to tell you how my day has been. I don't want to discuss upcoming holidays, or hear about your kids. I hate that I have to be fake in return.
My insides are filled with snapping, snarling dogs. With wriggling mosquito larvae and trapped moths. The frustration of jobs left unfinished and desires unfulfilled.
Leave me the fuck alone. Don't call me "sweetie", don't call me "girlie", don't call me "ma'am".
The only person I want is not present. You are not him. Go away.
I don't want to be nice and positive today.
I want to snap and hiss and writhe and pop.
I only reserve my softness for him.
I worry he is not safe.
I worry that, if I do not communicate well, he won't last.
That maybe he'll die.
That maybe something awful will happen to him.
Everyone else, get the fuck away from me.
