Sleeping With My Lover, Living With My Wife

One

*Patrick's POV*

I wake up early this morning with feelings of disgust and regret. My beautiful wife, Allie, doesn't deserve this anymore, I need to stop. I lean over and kiss her cheek, feeling sorry for making her think I'm still in love with her, especially after last night's intimacy.

I wonder to myself if there's a possibility of me being gay, but I shake my head in disbelief. I can't be.

I crawl out of bed and sluggishly walk into the bathroom, use the toilet, and brush my teeth before throwing on a pair of black skinny jeans and a plain gray t-shirt. I put on a pair of black converse and run my fingers through my hair, freeing it from a few snarls.

I sit down at the kitchen counter and place my head in my palms out of frustration. I can't figure out how or why I'm no longer in love with Allie, I'm just not. Also, how do I tell her? It will break her heart. We've been married for three years, I can't just randomly tell her that I've moved on. It would sound like I never loved her in the first place.

I grumble loudly, unsure of how to sort out this mess before I feel loving arms wrap around me. I turn around and force myself to smile at Allie who's looking up at me with loving eyes. Unwillingly, I lean in and kiss her passionately and tell her, "I love you, beautiful," the way I have for the past three years. I feel my heart sink with guilt, but she doesn't suspect anything. She, instead, continues on to make us a delicious breakfast.

After breakfast, Allie begs me to cuddle with her on the couch and watch romance movies. I'd rather shoot myself in the foot, but I agree anyway.

About halfway through the movie, there is a sex scene and I can tell Allie is beginning to get a little frisky. She starts nibbling on my ear before moving down to my neck, sucking a little. I try to ignore her, hoping she eventually realizes that I'm not in the mood for this. Of course, she doesn't understand and tries getting my attention by rubbing my thighs. When I still don't acknowledge her, her hand moves to my crotch. I'd be lying if I said it doesn't feel good, but I'm still not doing this with her.

I remove her hand from me and she pouts, sticking out her bottom lip. "Allie, stop. I'm not doing that right now," I scold. She rolls her eyes and does as I ask, continuing to pout.

"What's wrong, Patrick? You've never turned down a love making session with me before," she says seductively while curling up next to me, obviously still trying to convince me to please her.

"I just don't want to right now, okay?!" I snap. Allie stands up, on the verge of tears, and goes to the bedroom, slamming the door behind her. I feel bad for speaking to her so disrespectfully; she doesn't know what's going on in my head. She doesn't know I don't love her anymore.

I finally decide to apologize for snapping at her. She forgives me and I allow her to kiss me again, making her smile, but I don't. "I love you, Patrick!" she beams.

I don't mean it, but I force myself to reply, "I love you, too!" with a fake smile and a meaningless kiss on her cheek.

"Can you please stay and cuddle with me? Please baby?" Allie asks, giving me puppy dog eyes.

"Uh...mmm...sorry babe but I actually can't," I lie.

"Aww why not?" she whines.

I hesitate for another moment, trying to come up with another intelligent lie. "I uh... have to uh... go to the office to work on something tonight. Sorry it's last minute!" It was a terrible lie, but it was the best I could come up with. I attempt to give a reassuring smile, although I'm sure it just makes me look like more of a liar.

Fortunately, Allie believes me. Unfortunately, she thinks she needs to give me a goodbye make out session. She holds my head in place so I can't pull away from her lips. After what feels like an eternity, she finally releases her lips from mine. I hug her goodbye before quickly bolting out the door.

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I drive around the city, unsure of where to go, since I'm practically off the hook for the rest of the night. I know I shouldn't, but I eventually decide to go to the bar. I'm in desperate need of a drink.

I walk in and pick a spot at the bar and ask the bartender for a beer. It disappears in no time. I buy another, but drink a little slower this time, noticing a few of the other people around me as I do so.

Not a single female in the bar catches my eye, but instead, I catch myself staring at a man sitting alone a few seats down from me. I can't take my eyes off of him as I pay close attention to each and every move he makes. I'm mesmerized by his perfection.

I quickly shake my head and turn away, reminding myself that I'm not gay. Or am I? I'd be gay for him. My eyes widen at my thoughts, but I realize how true it is. He is the most attractive person I've ever laid eyes on.

I lose track of time as I continue watching the gorgeous man. He is beautiful with his tan complexion. Oh how I would love to look into his dark eyes, run my fingers through his frosty tipped hair, and kiss his thin lips every day of my life.

It's almost as if he can hear my thoughts, because he turns to look at me with a sexy smirk. My heart flutters and I smile back. He giggles and looks away before leaving his barstool, making his way toward me.

"Excuse me, may I buy this man a drink?" he asks the bartender about me, causing me to blush. I wonder how noticeable it must be since he giggles at me again.

"Here you go, sir," the bartender says as she hands me the drink. I grab it and take a sip. My favorite, how did this man know?

I thank him, smiling like an idiot as I gaze into his eyes. They're even more magnificent up close.

"Oh! I didn't even introduce myself! I'm Patrick," I say, turning red again with embarrassment. The handsome man giggles at my awkwardness.

He reaches out to shake my hand. "Hi, Patrick! I'm Pete!"