mistakes like this | minsung ✗

chapter nineteen

↳ minho's pov ⋆｡˚

jisung is wearing a tight jeans and pink ribbon bows on his waist and a white crop top shirt. his eyes are shut closed as he moves his body from place to place along the music bleeding through the space full of bodies of an ocean. he has a can of beer in his hands, and a hand around his waist.

i can't stop staring.

as crazy and insane that sounds, i can't stop staring at him. he's just so addicting to watch. to observe.

i probably look like a fucking loser. standing here by by myself staring at a person who's already taken by someone else.

truth is, i am a loser. a idiot. the bastard of the movie who does everything wrong until the end of everything.

jisung fell in love with me too soon, i fell in love with him too late.

how can i turn back time?

how can we start all over again?

we can't.

we just can't.

and i have to stop being so pathetic.

i swallow down my pride and walk out the room, moving elsewhere that wasn't near the other.

i just need a distraction.

for the first time since i have known parties existed, i wanted to leave. a party felt so revolting to be at now.

i walk around the kitchen, not recognizing any face so far. then, i walk out the back door and i am standing outside the house in the cold crisp weather.

i stare at the alcohol drink i held in my hands, i don't know why i suddenly feel so disgusted with myself. with the taste of beer stuck in my mouth and down my throat. with the feel of it in my stomach.

i crush the can with my hand and throw it across the street. i exhale out a breath and drop to my feet.

laying on the stranger's grass and staring off into the dark sky, rethinking of all the horrible choices i have made in my life so far.

there had to be more than twenty.

"minho-ah?" a surprise voice startles me and i quickly sit back up.

"hyunjin?" i'm speechless, completely embarrassed.

"what're you doing on the floor?" he says, confused and a bit amused? now why would he be amused?

"um," i awkwardly trail out. "it's...comfortable..?" i try to make up a lie that doesn't make me sound like an even bigger idiot. though i don't think that worked any better.

i shouldn't be as surprised when hyunjin abruptly joins me on the ground, sitting beside him. half laying down and half sitting up. i glance at him in confusion. "i like you're creativity, minho-ah. mindset is quite extraordinary," hyunjin's words make me let out a laugh in sarcasm.

extraordinary? creativity? those words are nothing like my personality or mindset.

those are polar opposites as to who i am truly am. in reality, i'm just another ordinary douchebag that only cares about himself.

"what's so funny?" hyunjin questions, stunned and puzzled to see me laughing so hysterically.

"i'm sorry," i gasp out, covering my mouth with my hand as i shake away the giggles. "you're just..." i breath in for air before i recompose myself and finally meet his gaze. "you're just so wrong about that," i tell him, my smile falling as i admit it to him.