The Hourglass

Seven

I woke the next morning to the sound of my alarm, feeling groggy and tired. I push away my desire to ignore the alarm and return to bed. My assignment is more important than my desire to sleep. I rub the sleep from my eyes, sit up, and glance over at the hourglass. Still full but trickling. 

I get ready and grab a book as I head out the door to the coffee shop. When I get there, there's a young male working. His name tag says 'Travis'. I wonder where the girl is today, but I assume it must be her day off.  I realized I never even noticed her wearing a nametag, like Travis. 

Travis appears young enough to still be in high school. He has dirty blond hair under the green hat that matches his green apron and wears a goofy but friendly smile. He's too enthusiastic for me this early in the morning, but I prefer that over an angry employee any day. I ordered my usual and headed back to the booth. 

I sigh as I sit down, hoping that today will be the day. I wonder, again, why this time is different. There must not be a rush if we haven't met like in the dream yet, but at the same time, there must be a rush, or the hourglass wouldn't have appeared. 

Usually, the hourglass appears because someone is nearing death, but it's a death that isn't necessary. It's a death that is a choice and can be changed. It's my job to make a difference in their life so they'll make a different decision. Why me? I often wonder. I'm not anything special or great. I don't know all of the right words to say or the right things to do. I just trust that it will come to me in the moment, and it always does. 

I wonder what my Dad would have to say if he knew. My dad is a religious man. He goes to church every Sunday and believes in God wholeheartedly. Growing up, I don't recall hearing any stories in the Bible about the appearance of magic hourglasses, though there was that story about the handwriting on the wall and the other story about the burning bush, so I suppose it's not that weird. 

I don't go to church with Dad anymore, which I know disappoints him. I still believe in God; I know there has to be something bigger than me that exists. There has to be some type of meaning to life, otherwise what would be the point in living? 

I realize I've been staring out the window, deep in thought, for a long time. I panic and feel my heart race as I realize I haven't been paying close enough attention to the customers coming in and out of the shop. I glance around, looking for him. My eyes dart through the customers standing in line to get their orders taken; I don't see him there. My eyes slowly scan the room for him. 

My breath catches, and I can hardly believe it when I see him sitting across the room from me. He stayed today. He's sitting in the chair I saw him in in my dream. He's reading a book, just like in my dream. And in that moment, he glances up from his book, and our eyes meet, and our moment has happened. 

I feel my heart race a bit as our eyes lock. Those piercing green ocean eyes captivate me despite their hollowness. We stare at each other for a few moments. I begin to wonder what will happen next. I don't have to wonder long. He breaks eye contact with me, closes his book, gets up, and turns to leave the shop. 

I'm confused, but something tells me to follow him, so I do. I catch him outside on the sidewalk just before he rounds the corner. "Hey!" I yell after him to get his attention. 

He stops and slowly turns around to face me, confusion written across his face. Wow. I think as I get closer to him. He's very handsome. He's tall enough that he has to bend his head to look down at me, and I have to tilt my head up to look at him. His hair is such a dark brown it almost looked black in the shop, but out in the sun I can see warmth in it. 

"Can I help you?" he asks. His green eyes have a spark of life in them now. It seems I've intrigued something in him. 

"Yeah," I say, a little breathless. "What's your name?" I ask. 

He stares at me for a moment. "You chased after me to ask me my name?" he asks, confusion still registering on his face. 

"Yeah," I replied simply. But I feel a little embarrassed, and my cheeks warm a bit at the question. 

"I didn't leave something behind that you wanted to return? You just want to know my name?" he continues to quiz me. 

"Yes," I replied. "Is that really so strange?" I counter back. 

"A little," he replies, but there seems to be something else registering in him. I can't read his expression, though. 

"So, will you tell me?" I push. "Your name?" 

He pauses and looks me up and down. He meets my eyes again. "Adam." 

"Adam," I repeat. "That's a nice name. I like it." I respond. I'm not sure how to hold his attention, so I introduce myself. "I'm Rosaline, but most people call me Rose or Rosie." 

"Why do they shorten it?" he asks, still eyeing me. 

"Oh, uhm, I don't know. I've never asked or really thought about it.." I say, trailing off, confused myself now. No one has ever called me by my full name, not even Dad. 

"I like Rosaline," he says simply. 

My cheeks warm again. "Thank you," I responded shyly. 

"Well, Rosaline. It was nice to meet you." He says as he turns to leave. My heart drops, and I find that I'm disappointed. Not because my assignment isn't going the way I thought it would, and I have to work abnormally hard to encounter him, but because something in me has the desire to get to know him. A different desire than I normally have on these assignments. 

"Wait," I find myself saying. He seems a little exasperated as he turns back to me, but curious. I try not to feel offended. 

"Would you want to spend some time with me today?" I ask, entirely fearful of his response. 

He chuckles. "Are you...asking me out?" 

I blush. "I-well, I mean.." I stutter. What was I supposed to say? I wasn't asking him out. He obviously thinks I'm hitting on him. He is very handsome...But no, I just need to spend time with him. To get to know him. So I can make a difference in his life. Because I know...I know he's nearing the end of his time. 

"I've never been asked out before," he says, obviously amused. 

"Well, I mean. It doesn't have to be like a date. I just thought it would be nice to get to know you." I try to explain lamely. I obviously can't tell him why, so letting him believe I'm asking him out is probably the easiest route to go. However, his rejection will leave me feeling humiliated, and I'll have no idea how to finish my assignment. A brief moment of panic makes my heart skip a beat. I can't mess this up. I can't fail again. 

He looks at me for another moment before replying. "I'm busy today. But how about we meet back here tomorrow morning for coffee? Same time?" he asks. 

I'm elated. "Yes. Absolutely." I say, smiling, completely relieved. 

"Okay, until then," he says, trailing off. He leaves this time. I don't round the corner after him to see where he goes. I'm relieved that I'm back on track. Tomorrow. I'm meeting him here tomorrow. And then I'll make a difference in his life, and then his hourglass will disappear, and I'll go back to...to what? 

To my peacefully quiet apartment. Where I work alone. And I isolate myself from the world. Guilt pangs me as I think of the conversation with Dad the other night. It's settled, then. After I finish helping Adam, I'm going to put myself out there and try to make some real friends and go on some dates, so I'm not left all alone when he dies. The thought terrifies me.