One in the Same

Ch 2: Danielle

What was that one thing people would always say? When the days blurred together so much you could never recall what day you were actually on?

Another day, another dollar?

I call bullshit.

Starting over sucked. You had your life together with the partner you thought was your end game. Shared all the bills, made tons of memories and you thought you were happy. It was long term, and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. We talked about it all the time. Getting married, having kids, growing old together, watching them graduate and move on with their lives. And then we would die together holding each other's hands, like in The Notebook.

But no. Everything changed and it changed faster than I would get a grip on what was reality and what was a fantasy.

The script gets flipped, your credit gets ruined, and he's gone with everything you worked your ass off for over time. I was a fucking wreck. And over and over I went with everything we ever did together, and I couldn't understand why. I couldn't understand how someone can be good for so long...

Just to toss it all in the trash on garbage day.

And the shittest thing of it all? Was running back to my mom and telling her what happened.

See, my mother wasn't the kindest of hearts to me, out of two other kids who have moved far away and hardly talk to her, I was the only one left to be the mental punching bag. And let me just say, it's as exhausting as working the double I will be on tonight.

Dressing myself in my work attire I then applied my makeup, making myself look and seem put together. From open to close, I had to at least look like I had some type of life left in me. At least that's what my boss Parker would say.

One more coat of mascara and a spray of perfume later, I was good to go. Overlooking myself in the mirror, it made me shiver. I wasn't the skinniest person in the world, but I wasn't the heaviest. I was more.. In between. Although I was more on the thicker side, I could see the thinning of my cheeks. My collarbones were beginning to peak through the v-neck styled waitressing polo I was required to wear. The bags under my eyes were terrible but even I could tell though the make up I needed a week's worth of sleep.

I was starting over.

I was keeping my head low, and working my ass off to get out of his house. I love my mother. She means everything and more to me. She is all I have left. Most people would say that we could be twins if her hair was dark like mine, and her eyes blue instead of brown. Heaving a hefty sigh, I grabbed my phone off the charger, shoving my feet into my sneakers making my way down the stairs.

"Goodness, sounds like a herd of cows coming down the stairs." My mother snorted. Sitting at the table, per usual. Sipping her 3-5th cup of coffee, in the same cotton black robe she wore last night when I came home. Barely a word was spoken last night, like she was disgusted by me even coming through her front door. So I dragged myself straight to bed.

"Good morning to you too." I murmured, pouring myself a cup. Out of the corner of my eyes I saw muffins and snagged one of those too.

"Working late again tonight?" My mom asked. Spinning only my heel I nodded, my eyes meeting hers over the brim of my coffee cup. The bitterness of the coffee followed by the sweet aftertaste of my Hazelnut Mocha creamer eased my raging nerves deprived of caffeine.

My mother shook her head, as if she were disappointed I was working so much. "You should get out more, find someone to take care of you."

My mouth frowned, "I think I will take a pass on that for $200, Alex."