One in the Same

CH 15: Danielle

"It's just not fair, Jake." I sighed. Endless amounts of tears streaming down my face, running the make up I've tried to redo at least four times.

Work was calling my name, so was my bank account. Although the check from Parker had cleared, I wasn't ready to touch more of it than I already have.

"What isn't?"

"How quickly I get attached to people." I admitted.

"What do you mean?"

"I just... with my ex. We moved in after only a few months of being together. I barely knew him and yet I felt like I wanted to spend my life with him at the time. I didn't see the bad, because I was so into him. I loved him a lot. I was attached to him like Velcro. Everything about my life had to do with him, about him, around him.

"And now with Blake it's... different. I want him, but he gives me the space for me to be me, and independent. To come to him when I'm lonely and want to be company and — oh! Did you know he hates working for his dad, and wants to be a Chef? Like his own restaurant?! Isn't that crazy? We've gotten to get to know one another and it's—"

"You mean, how easily you care? Baby girl, your heart is as big as your ass, and it shows. And there is nothing wrong with it."

"Yeah but it gets me hurt a lot. And I'm tired of being hurt, Jay." I cried.

"I know you do, boo. And I'm so sorry I can't fix it. But we have weed and wine to help dull the pain!" Jake joked, grabbing his stash box.

"It hurts too much. I just want something good for the bad to stop."

Jake sighed, grinding up the flower and grabbing a paper. Rolling up two thick joints, the soaked done as passed to me. Gladly taking it, I inhaled the earthy cannabis Red Sapphire #4. Tasting of tangerine and a hint of mint, I exhaled the smoke feeling it immediately dull the pain. Not all, but a small amount.

"What if there is something wrong about it? What if because my heart is so big I just lend it to anyone and I don't pay much mind to who really hurts me; until I'm actually hurting?"

Jake side eyes me as he spills more wine in his glass, handing me the tissue box. I gladly accepted three of them, wiping my nose and eyes. Jake ashes the joint taking his hits, passing it over.

"There's nothing wrong with caring about people, D. What's wrong is people abusing that trust and using it against you."

My eyes bugged wide.

"Are you aging Blake used me for—"

"Girl, please. I'm talking about your fuckface of an ex using you. Blake was and I'm sure still is into you, bitch. Like head over heels into you. I'm sure as hell certain Blake would've said it if he had the chance too."

I bit my lip, protecting it from wobbling some more. I took a hit and passed the joint to Jake who gladly finished it off, coughing.

"Personally, I don't think it's right for the WPP to keep you from making at least one call to someone dear to you." I sniffed, gulping my wine.

It's been well around a month since I've heard from Blake. Jake hasn't heard from him either. All of his texts are never delivered nor read. All calls go straight to voicemail. Blake's brother, Cole, informed me two weeks ago Blake had went into witness protection but couldn't say why.

I've been a mess since.

"I know it isn't, but I'm sure it was for good reason. Witness protection isn't some shit to fuck around with. You don't want to be found, and change your identity for special reasons? Consider it done." Jake waved it off and dished, taking a sip of his wine.