Atsushi woke up. He put his hand to his forehead and breathed a few times. He felt normal again.
He also knew that the things he did yesterday weren't normal.
He was a fucking monster. Just like the headmaster always predicted.
"Atsushi, are you coming?" Kyoka yells from the living room and the weretiger looks her way.
"I'm a bit sick. But you can go without me" He yells back and Kyoka sighs since she knows Atsushu won't even allow her to help him get better and leaves the apartment.
The wereitger slowly stands up and looks at his phone. He scrolls down to 'Akutagawa' and clicks on the contact. He scrolls through their chats.
All they write is their locations and occasionally Atsushi writes a quick 'bye'.
Not today though. Atsushi kept writing something, deleting it, writing something again...But what words could even make anything he did yesterday feel not as bad?
He puts the phone away and groans. The only way to apologize to the diablo was to talk with him face-to-face.
____
Akutagawa hears a knock on the door and wonders who it might be. He had a free day today and Gin was at work, so was Chuuya, Higuchi and anyone who would ever visit him. But he didn't get any previous call or text that someone was calling.
He puts his jacket on. What if it's some high-rank criminal who was sent on a mission to kill him?
He walks towards the door. There's a faint ache in his lower parts of his body but it's nothing in comparison to the pain in his lungs he gets every few hours. The hours he spent under the shower yesterday did not help much. Not for his ache nor for the way he felt.
Akutagawa looks through the small glass hole in the door and a few seconds later he swings the door open.
"What the hell, Jinko?!" He yells and with his Rashomon he pushes Atsushi to hte ground. He makes sure the ability hurts Atsushi a lot and knows he succeeded when the wereitger hisses. He tries to stand up but today the one in control is Akutagawa, not him.
Atsushi groans and looks at the diablo.
"I came here to apologize!" He yells and there are a few tears in his eyes. He felt so goddamn guilty.
Akutagawa scoffs.
"Apologize? Are you serious?" Akutagawa says in disbelief and his Rashomon is dangerously close to Atsushi's neck. It starts bleeding a bit and the diablo pushes it even harder against it. Maybe he will even sever Atsushi's head soon?
"I know what I did yesterday was wrong. I couldn't control myself. But I still feel so guilty. And I... I know we're enemies and that we hate each other, but what I did yesterday was seriously over the limits and-„
"Oh shut up. I know you fucking liked it. You liked making me vulnerable, didn't you? Is that because you know I'm stronger than you?" Akutagawa asks even though he knows it's not true. He knows that his illness is making him weaker every day while Atsushi's getting stronger and tougher.
The weretiger frowns and manages to get Rashomon off of him. He stands up but the ability catches him again.
"Don't come closer." Akutagawa warns but Atsushi doesn't listen. Again.
"If you kill me I doubt Dazai will ever even consider complimenting you" He says. He stands in one place though after taking two steps forwards. He looks into Akutagawa's eyes and the diablo feels unfocused for a few seconds. Because why did Atsushi look like he actually meant that apology?
The weretiger senses Akutagawa's confusion and steps even closer. He doesn't want to hurt the diablo. He just wants to apologize, even if he's bound by his abilities. It's actually better this way. The weretiger was scared that what he did yesterday might happen again.
Akutagawa takes a step back and hits the wall behind him. Why does he feel so helpless again? He knows he's in control of the current situation and Atsushi couldn't be able to hurt him, so what's the fear in his body?
He remembers how a day ago he was also pressed against a similar, cold wall and he immediately pushes himself away from him. He's a mafia executive. He shouldn't be conserned about some... memories.
"Go away" Akutagawa mutters and looks away. He unconsciously grabs on the sleeve of his jacket and turns around. He walks to his door and only releases Rashomon when he's inside the house.
"I'm really sorry-„ Atsushi starts to say again but Akutagawa slams the door shut. He doesn't want to listen to the weretiger's voice anymore. He goes to the couch and sits on it. He stares at the tv in front of him but doesn't turn it off. He just looks at his reflection.
Akutagawa's still confused about what happened yesterday. Not because of the weretiger's sudden personality change but more why he chose... him. Why, out of all the people Atsushi could^ve had sex with, he chose the sick and ugly Ryunosuke Akutagawa.
He hates that his heart is beating faster. He hates that because he yearned for touch and love, one that was not a platonic one from his sister, he felt that what Atsushi did yesterday wasn't that bad.
If Atsushi did that to his sister, the weretiger would get tortured by him until he was begging for death. But when it happened to the diablo himself? Well, Akutagawa didn't consider himself important enough. He hated that he was glad that it was him that Atsushi chose to rape.
____
About a week later, Akutagawa gets called into Mori's office. He receives a new mission, an undercover one. He and a member from the ADA will have to infiltrate an important masked ball and capture one of the important business men. Apparently he has some info about the book that everyone was searching for.
"Go to the ADA with this and ask Fukuzawa which member is available" Mori orders and no matter how much Akutagawa doesn't want to go into the enemy's HQ, he nods.
He arrives at the place after about 20 minutes and as soon as he opens the door he gets greeted with Dazai's face.
"Akutagawa? What are you doing here?" Dazai smiles but Akutagawa knows it's a fake one. One that DAzai shows to people he doesn't like and finds annoying. Akutagawa still hopes he can change that one day.
"I have Mori's documents" He says and after he gets brought to Fukuzawa's office he explains the details of the new case.
Fukuzawa tales the documents and skims over them before looking back up at the mafia executive.
"And you need our help because...."
"Mori did not say"
"Hm" Fukuzawa just nods and then stands up. He places one hand on his katana but Akutagawa notices that he does it every time he's around a member of an enemy organization so he's not scared that Fukuzawa was going to battle him in this very room.
"Alright then. Atsushi?" He calls after he leaves the room. Akutagawa sucks in a breath.
"Yes, Fukuzawa-san?" Atsushi asks from behind the computer and looks at the man. That's when he notices Akutagawa who desperately tries to avoid eye-contact.
"You and Akutagawa are going on a mission in two days. I'll explain the details to you later. But remember, this is an undercover mission so I expect you and Akutagawa to be on your best behavior" he says.
Both men know this isn't a good idea. Unfortunately, they cannot go against their bosses' orders.
______
I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter
-Nat
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The (rut) cycle (shinsoukoku)
FanfictionAtsushi woke up hot and in sweat. Not sick but didn't feel entirely healthy either. He knew something was up with his body, especially since right after he saw Akutagawa he felt weirdly horny... Why is his brain not listening to him? And why should...
