The (rut) cycle (shinsoukoku)

Chapter 14

He didn't know when it all stopped. He just laid in the medical bed and one second Atsushi and the other he was just...not.

His stomach was incredibly hurt but not in the way when Atsushu's dick enlarged that one time.

He looks down and gasps.

His stomach is covered in bandages and some of them have a red color on them. Akutagawa doesn't need to be a genius to realize that it's blood.

He quickly takes them off and once all of them are gone, he lets out a small cry.

There are words engraved on him and they're deep. Deep enough for Akutagawa to know it will scar, not heal. Deep enough for him to know that it's going to stay on his stomach his entire life.

"Property of Atsushi Nakajima"

All bloodied. All terrible. All... telling his fate. A fate he was now sure he would not be able to escape.

He calls Chuuya from his phone that for some reason was right next to him.

___________

Akutagawa is full of hickeys, bruises, kisses, basically everything he doesn't want on his body.

Instead of Mori, it was Chuuya, Dazai and the ADA doctor Yosano looking at him. Dazai had a frown and for the first time in his life he could understand that Dazai actually felt bad for him. Chuuya had worry on his face and kept asking Yosano if the scars would fade. He was disappointed when Yosano shook her head. She did not want to heal the scar because she hated people from the port mafia, so Alutagawa could only rely on how much nature would help him.

"Shit" Chuuya mutters and Dazai puts a hand on his shoulder. Chuuya shakes him away almost immediately.

"Now we know why Atsushi saved him..." The bandaged man tells everyone and that just makes everyone grimmer.

Akutagawa stares in front of him, almost emotionless. He knows Dazai is staring at him and moves his head when chuuya and Yosano leave to discuss something.

"..." Dazai opens his mouth and closes it a few seconds later. Now words leave his mouth and Akutagawa is glad for that. Whatever his ex-mentor will say will be out of pity, and Akutagawa doesn't want that.

Dazai continues staring at Akutagawa and once again gets hit with flashbacks.

His ex-mentee seemed a lot like him back when he still had a bandage on his eye. Akutagawa was so vulnerable right now but this time, they would protect him.

"You can leave too, Dazai" Akutagawa says and is surprised by the lack of manners. The bandaged man chuckles quietly.

"I can't."

"Why? You don't have to feel guilty or anything" He says. He wants Dazai to leave.

"I do. I'm his mentor. He became the way he is under my command"

"No he didn't. He's just a fucking monster and-"

"I'm proud of you"

Silence.

"...no you're not"

"I am"

"And why? For what? What did I do to gain your attention?" Akutagawa asks, angry.

"You didn't end up like Atsushi."

"So? You're glad I didn't end up like him. Not proud. Listen Dazai, I don't want your pity. I will maybe never gain your respect by my actions but that's much better than gaining it by pity. So just stop. And please, leave" Akutagawa says and tightens his grip on his bed sheets.

Dazai stands up and nods. He doesn't say another word when he leaves the room.

____________

When Gin finds her brother, he's sleeping. She silently cries, feeling guilty. Because how could she have let Atsushi get so close to him. She couldn't see through his acts and only saw his appearance... Her brother was surely disappointed or atleast mad at her,

"Gin?" She hears a weak voice and looks to where to where the voice come from.

Akutagawa just woke up,

"Ryuu!" She says loudly and embraces him. He smiles and is glad to finally see his sister's face.

She waited a long time to see her brother because Dazai and the others told her not to go in yet, that her brother needed some rest. But now, she was finally there, by his side.

How did it come to this? What her brother and the weretiger had in the beginning was enemy-rivalry... When did it all change'Why did it change.

She shakes her head. Right now, she shouldn't worry about that. She should only focus on helping her brother and to make sure he doesn't get hurt again.

She and her brother talk for some of the night until she finally yawns and Akutagawa tells her to rest too. She does and the second she closes her eyes some of her worry flows away. Her anger at Atsushi doesn't though

The same things with the person many kilometers away from them. If anything, his anger only grows. The anger of Akutagawa not being in his grip anymore.

He'll just have to find another way to make him permanently his. 

_______

I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter
-Nat