this is a short one but trust be when i say your thank me later. HUGE tw violence, rape, drugs and alcoholic behaviour. i don't know if you guys are gonna recover from this one.
setting - shibs has just gotten her wedding dress and has just gotten home after her interaction with Vivian.
i walk in through the door and into the kitchen, finding a very drunk roger on the stool.
"hey princess" he mumbles, mixing up his words
"hello roger" i say, getting my things put away as fast as i can so i can go to my room and end this encounter.
"woah not so fast gorgeous" i look back at him.
"i want to have my fun with you first, i got you something special" he says with a seductive smile, holding up a pair of new laced thongs and bras, more than i can count.
he steps towards me, trying to keep stable. his gaze travels to my tits.
"i'm sorry i don't really feel like it today" i mutter, ready to pull away.
"i didn't fucking ask if you felt like it did i?" he groans, his voice in a more aggressive manner and he gets closer and closer until his face is right up against mine.
"nothing to say now princess do you?"
i gulp, staring at him as his hand travels up my skirt, by body pulling away, only making him pull me closer. i whimper in pain as his other hand presses against my waist, making me feel sharp pains.
"roger please stop it" i express, trying to dodge my head away from him.
"you will do what you're fucking asked" he looks at me, his eyes filled with rage as he slaps me in the face. my cheek burns and the pain fills me up. i begin to wonder if it would be better to just let him use me again.
he slams me against the wall and forces his dick inside me, i scream in pain, knowing I'm completely dry. it's killing me seeing his face all flared up with pleasure. he moans loudly. my breath is shaky and my eyes water as he releases inside of me, letting all of it travel into me. i stare at the wall, feeling numb as i know what this could lead to.
he finally lets go and starts to pull away and put his trousers back on. i hear the clicking of his belt and i'm suddenly reminded of the first time he ever took it off, the first time he ever took it off when i didn't want him too. i shudder trying to wash away all of those horrible reminders. his drunkenness shows even more as he stumbles through the doorway, finding another beer bottle and chugging it in seconds. he then opens up another cupboard and grabs a shot glass out of it, filling it with vodka.
he steps towards me and forces my mouth open, pouring the shot into me. i cough as i feel the burning hit my through, bitterness filling up my mouth.
"roger what the fuck" i say, still coughing from the shock. i see him pouring another shot glass with vodka. i know what he's doing now.
this time when he comes over i don't hesitate. i take the shot glass from him and swallow it straight away. he's trying to drunken me up, and honestly right now i don't even mind.
———————————————————————————
1 shot
2 shot
3 shot
4 shot
shit did i lose count. start again
1 shot
3 shot?
5 shot
and again.
1 shot
2 shot
i don't know what number i'm on. i can't remember. my head is pounding as i lift the cigarette up to my mouth and take a long drag. i can't remember where i got it from. but i can take a wild guess judging by roger sitting across me with an amused look on his face.
as i bring the fag up to my mouth again, i notice all of the fresh bruises made on my wrists. he must have beaten me again. i can't remember. i can't remember my own name anymore.
i bet he remembers my name though, i bet he remembers my fucking name. i stare at the man with no emotion, there is no emotion to feel towards him right now.
just another shot
just one more
okay maybe another
i've lost count again. my brain goes fuzzy and my eyesight is blurry. i see pills on the table next to me, wondering how many i've already taken. i dont know what's in them, right now i couldn't care less. all that's repeating in my head is one word. spell it out Siobhan.
O-V-E-R-D-O-S-E
same word repeats in my head as i take another pill.
O-V-E-R-D-O-S-E
and another one. the word starts repeating over and over as i'm now taking small handfuls, ready to shove them down my throat, until my eyes close.
i'm numb. just as always wanted to be, i think. closing my eyes again not knowing if it's the last time i ever close them again.
note - sorry
YOU ARE READING
shibby - an endless loop of toxic love
Fanfictionsiobhan is stuck between her @busive relationship with roger. she is confused as she leeps into the idea of balancing a life containing a certain nurse called annie.
