You're Like A French Fry (a transgender love story)

James, open your eyes

(TW: attempted suicide (yeah, I actually out a tw this time) )

I awoken, scared. I uncurled my body, and looked at the ceiling.

"Lee! You may be released today, like right now." A doctor spoke. 

I didn't respond as they lifted me up, and made me stand.

"James..." My brain spoke for me.

"Oh, James? Would you like to go over and see him?" 

"I need him." I actually needed his love, support, and awesomeness. 

The doctor lead me to another hospital room.

"Here James is! I'll leave you two alone!"

"Wait, is he dead?" I stopped the doctor.

"He's been ina coma for a few months now."

"How long was I asleep?" I ask, confused. 

"A few months...." 

"Do you know if James will make it?" I asked, hopeful.

"Based on what we've gathered, no... I'm sorry Lee." The doctor left.

I walked over to James' sleeping body.

"James, please, open your eyes. Wake up I don't know how I'm gonna live without you," I whined.

"Without you, I'm dead, without you, I feel like there's no point in living. James, you're the only one that kept me alive. I wouldn't be here now, I would've killed myself before my mom could.x

"Please, wake up, for me, for you..."

I sat there, holding his hand, crying. If someone told me to let go, I wouldn't.

After a few hours of him not waking up, I felt like there was no point in even trying to live myself. Without him, I felt like nothing. I felt emptiness.

And so, I got up, said I love you to James, and went to the bathroom that his hospital room had.

I filled the sink to the brim with water, and place my head in the water. Trying to drown myself.

A few moments passed, and I still hadn't died. "God, please. I have no life, let me die." I spoke in the water, getting water in my pipes, and I started choking.

In the water.

"Oh my God!" I heard a faint sound of a doctor. "James, how are you waking up right now?"

I quickly brought my head up, before falling, I had choked way to hard.

"Holy shit, Lee!" Everything was black, but I heard the sound of the doctor running over to me. 

He started doing CPR.

And soon, I could see again. I tried to open my mouth to thank him, but I had nded up throwing up water.

"Are you ok?" The doctor asked. 

"Yeah," I manage to say.

The doctor helped me get up 

"Why did you do that?" The doctor asked, concerned. 

"James wasn't waking up, and I felt there was no point in even living if he wasn't there. Then I heard you scream that he was waking up, so I quickly got out of the water before I actually died."

Before the doctor could reply, I ran over to James.

"Lee? Is that you?" James asked.

"Babe! Oh my God, you're alive!" I grabbed his hand.

"That I am, that I am. I heard you talking to me, and I tried to talk, but I couldn't.. Then I heard you trying to drown yourself, and well, that's when I couldn't handle not being able to speak, so I tried to yell, it didn't work at first, but slowly, I was able to talk." 

"James. I'm so sorry I nearly killed myself..." I apologized, truthfully.

"If you hadn't, I wouldn't be awake or alive at all right now..." James looked longingly at me.

"Oh my God, you need some meat on you! You're all skin and bones!" I looked over at his belly.

"Don't worry, baby. I'll be back in nearly a month," he spoke just before I kissed him.