You're Like A French Fry (a transgender love story)

The Ramen Chronicles

I never thought that this would even be possible.

I'm on a airplane to Ukraine, James is next to me, fast asleep.

I'm wide awake, and starving. The problem is that the only food the frickin' airplane has is snacks. Well, that's all they've offered.

I saw that others were getting ramen, so I ask for some. I was declined. Excuse me, but I'm riding first class, give me the ramen.

I'm only riding first class because the other seats when I went to go find tickets were taken or just not available because it's only been a month since Ukraine won the war, and some planes are like y'know exploded.

First class was only 1,500 bucks. I was honestly surprised.

"Hello there, sir. Would you like any Pringles?" A food hander outer (don't know the actual term) asked.

"Oh jeez! Can I get some ramen?" I'm startled.

"No, sir. We cannot give first class ramen."

"I'm starving, the only thing you have available for first class is literally chips, give me the ramen!" I seriously don't see how they can't give me a cup of ramen.

"Ramen isn't considered first class worthy, sir!"

"I COULDN'T CARE LESS ABOUT FIRST CLASS WORTHY FOOD! And heck, Pringles isn't considered first class, so what's this bullshit about?" I need the ramen before I pass the fuck out.

"We can't give you the ramen."

"I paid fifteen hundred for this first class seat, and the only thing available for me is snacks? Waste of my fucking money." I roll my eyes.

"We can't give you the ramen." They repeated.

"Do you want me to pass out?" I ask.

"No, sir."

"Then give me some ramen!" I don't want to start trouble. I just need food in my system before I pass out.

"Here." They hand me Pringles. "Eat that, you motherfucker."

"Don't call me by your name," I mutter, quiet enough for them to not hear as they walk away.

I rip open the Pringles, and as I'm about to put one in my mouth, someone stops me.

"They poisoned that! Don't eat it!" The someone yells.

"Ok, ok, ok, I didn't want to eat this anyway!" I put the Pringle back in it's container, and throw it away.

I look over at James, who is slowly waking up. "Baby, I'm hungry," he says as he looks at me.

"Same, but the only thing I've been given is poisoned Pringles."

"Damnit."

We both sit there, holding hands, our stomachs gurgling.

And, before I know it, I pass out.