Shifters - The King of Wolves - Book 1

CHAPTER 36 - POISONOUS THOUGHTS

We lay in peaceful silence, wrapped in the comforting embrace of each other as the final traces of daylight filtered through the tall windows.

The room was filled with the soothing sound of our synchronized breathing. Yet, as I relaxed against Egon, my mind drifted back to earlier events of the day, the doubts and uncertainties that had been lingering in my mind.

"What's wrong?" Egon asked, breaking the silence.

I sighed inwardly. His heightened senses seemed to pick up on the smallest changes in my mood, and I knew I couldn't hide anything from him.

"I don't know where to begin," I whispered, feeling the weight of my thoughts pressing down on me.

Egon gently brushed a strand of hair from my face. "If it has anything to do with me, or if I went too far earlier, you must tell– "

"No, it's not that," I quickly interrupted, my voice firm. "I don't regret what happened."

"Then what is it?" he asked, his tone filled with a mix of confusion and worry.

I took a deep breath and shifted my gaze to the high ceiling. "Why do you think the Moon Goddess matched you with me, a human?"

Egon's expression softened. "Because she knew you were everything I needed."

I sighed in frustration. "I'm serious, Egon."

He sat up, and I followed, pulling the sheets around my bare chest.

"I am serious too," he replied as his eyes darkened. "For as long as I can remember, I've been responsible for the care of my land and my people. While it certainly had its challenges, I've always been able to fulfil my responsibilities. My land and people are safe. But what my kingdom lacked, what I was missing, was a sense of connection, of care, of love. Those things, Esmara, are you."

His words touched me deeply, but my insecurities whispered doubts in my mind. "But don't you want someone like your own kind? Someone worthy?"

Egon's face hardened with anger. "Don't speak like that ever again. You are more than worthy. I'd rather gouge out my own eyes and eat them than be with someone else."

"That sounds a bit extreme," I murmured.

"I am dead serious." Knowing him, I knew he was.

"Where is this coming from?" Egon asked after a while, his tone softer. but still concerned.

"I've been thinking about it for a while," I admitted.

Egon was silent for a moment, studying me closely. I felt uncomfortable under his gaze as if he could see through to my very soul. "No, it's more than that," he finally said.

"What do you mean?" I asked, surprised.

"I mean that yesterday, one moment you were laughing and enjoying dinner with our pack, and the next, your eyes were distant, and your smile was gone."

My heart began to race, nervous about where this conversation was heading.

"I want to know what happened," Egon continued. "I decided not to press you yesterday, but now you're asking these ridiculous questions."

"They're not ridiculous," I whispered softly.

"Don't avoid the topic, Esmara," Egon sighed, frustration evident in his voice. "Tell me, what happened?"

I hesitated, not wanting to tell him what Morana had said to me in the toilets. I didn't want to create tension between Egon and his friends. Besides, she was right. I needed to hear that I was running away from my responsibilities. I decided to share only part of the truth.