DEMA

Semi-Automatic

August 20th, 3001
Night falls, with gravity.
The earth turns, from sanity.
Taking my only friend I know.
He leaves a lot.
His name is Hope.

The horrors of the night melt away under the warm glow of survival of the day.
Then we move on.
My shadow grows taller along with my fears.
And my frame shrinks smaller as night grows near.
When the sun is climbing window sills.
And the silver lining rides the hills.
I will be saved.
For one whole day.
Until the sun makes the hills its grave.
By the time the night wears off.
The dust is down.
And shadows burn.
I will rise and stand my ground.
Waiting for the night's return.

I woke with a dull pain at the back of my head, and a sting in my eyes from the morning sun.
My throat hurt, and I was thirsty.
I pushed myself up from the hard pavement, I was lying on the ground.
"Drink this" said a voice, and I turned around to see Josh offering me a bottle of water.
I grabbed it from his hand and drank as fast as I could, letting the cold liquid run down my throat and breath life back into my body.
"What happened?" I asked him, "Why am I lying on the ground?"
"You don't rembember?" he asked, and I tried to wreck my brains, but the last thing I rembembered was sitting on the steps of the crumbled church and drinking spirits.
I shook my head "I don't rembember anything..."
Josh looked scared for me, and I wondered was it forgiveness that I could sense in his voice.
"You... You tried to end your own life" he told me, "You were drunk... And you came back to Jenna's apartment, she... She didn't want you there, you didn't take that very well, you started screaming and ranting, you were so drunk, and then... You tried to kill her-"
"Is she OK?"
"Yes... You didn't get to her... I stopped you, and we fought, and you got away... And you came here a told me you were going to throw yourself down the steps, and that your life was worthless and you were an evil and terrible person, I had to knock you out to stop you from throwing your life away, and now you're awake."
"why did you save me?"
Josh grimaced, "Belive it or not Clancy, I still care about you."
I didn't belive him, but I still nodded, and rose to me feet.
I began walking away.
"and where do you think you're going?" he asked.
"To the pub" I replied.
"Clancy please... You'll drink yourself to death!" he yelled.
I stopped in my tracks.
"You should have let me end it" I told him.
"No I shouldn't have-"
"You should have let me end it back at the frozen lake, it would have speared you the deaths of your family."
"you matter just as much to me as any family... In fact, you're the only one I've got left."
I ignored him and kept walking, it hurt less that way.
He tried to call my name and chase after me but he soon relised it was too late, I had made up my mind.
If I was going to end my life, I was going to have to take Nico down with me.

August 21st, 3001
Where'd you go?
They all think they know you.
It's so hard to motivate me to devote a single inch of me to something I can't see.
I don't mean to pry, but why would you even make the eyes?
I don't believe my ears, and I'm scared of my own head.
I will deny you for years then I'll make you raise me from the dead.
And if I said that I would live for you for nothing in return.
Well, I'm sorry, Mr. Gullible, but lying's all I've learned.
So be concerned.

I am disappearing inside my bird's eye theories.
I try to say goodbye, defy, and deny what it is I'm fearing.
Clearly, I am dying, tearily I am writing, merely testifying, that to testify requires I pass the test with colours flying.
I don't believe you most the time.
I'm lying because I say I am fine.
You are the pearl, I am the swine.
So break my life and take this rhyme.
I'm so sorry but I do believe that all my bridges, I have burned.
And I've earned a policy of no returns.
So be concerned.

I awoke with perhaps the whorst hangover I had ever experienced, made all the worse by BlurryFace whispering in my ear.
"I'd like to see you TRY and kill him! Oh great breather of fire! You're nothing against Nicolas Bourbaki!" he sniggered, hysterical over the fact I thought i could take down Nico, or even enter his tower unoticed.
"Shut up!" I growled to him, as I made my way towards the nine towers.
I morphed, and did my best to stay out of view of Nicos little window.
I skulked around the edges of all nine towers to look for the lowest window.
It was in the tower belonging to "Nills" that I found the lowest window.
He was known to be the second most ruthless bishop after Nico, and chills ran up my spine as I morphed back into a human and grabbed the windowsill, hauling myself up.
I grabbed the rock I had picked up earlier for this exact task from my pocket and shattered the windowsill.
I hoped beyoned hope that nobody had heared it.
I morphed again and slipped silently trough the window.
The floor of Nills room was covered in a sticky red carpet, and my paws moved silently acorss it.
I inched my nose trough the door, my ears rotating at the creaking sound it made as I slipped trough it.
I had been in these halls many the time before, and I knew that all the bishops towers were connected.
I followed my instincts, somhow I just knew where the door to Nicos tower was.
Little did I know it was BlurryFace leading me there.
I morphed to human form again, and put my hand on the doorknob.
I twisted it, and entered the room, ready to set Nico ablaze the moment I got the chance.
He stood with his back to me, peering from his high window.
I could feel him smirking.
"Hello Clancy" he greeted, turning around to walk towards me.
He stopped less then a metre away from me, and I stood stock-still, frozen in fear.
"You were expecting me?" I asked him, surprisingly cooley, as if I knew him better then I did.
I could see him smirking from underneath his dark hood, and he let out a small chuckle.
"Have you forgotten, Clancy, that I can see your every moment, read your every thought, and even control your every action? Or did you just think you were going mad?"
I didn't say anything, I was too stunned to speak.
"I am BlurryFace!" Nico hissed, and his frame began to morph into that of BlurryFace, big white holes for eyes, a grusume, haunting smile and a deep void of darkness all around him, blurring his face.
I morphed and leaped at him, Jaws ablaze, but he dodged easily and I came crashing down into his bookshelf, scattering the books everywhere, some even landing on me and bruising my small fox body.
I was extremely out of practice.
I was about to light another spark of fire when a sudden searing heat filled my mind.
My head had never hurt so much in my entire life, and it made my eyes feel like they were being pulled from their sockets.
The pain was so great that it knocked me out.

I'm never what I like, i'm double-sided.
And I just can't hide, I kinda like it.
When I make you cry.
Because I'm twisted up.
I'm twisted up.
Inside.
I'm Semi-automatic.
My prayer's schizophrenic.
But I'll live on.
I'll live on.
I'll live on.
Inside.