Irish Promises

Chapter Fifty-Three

Stasia

In my sleep dazed state I didn't quite comprehend that telling the others that my chest felt tight was a horrendous idea.

Had I been more with it I probably would have realised that keeping it to myself would have been the better option.

Yes it felt tight but it wasn't exactly hurting and no matter how many times I told them that it didn't stop them all from going into panic mode.

I'm pretty sure they thought I was going to drop dead right there and then.

Apparently we'd flown to far to be able to turn back given the emergency so the next best thing was to still land in New York although instead of just refuelling and flying to LA we're now sitting in a hospital room whilst Blake paces up and down and the twins look as if I'm going to die.

Hugh's off god knows where arguing with whatever Doctor he can so I get seen quicker. Refusing to accept that we have to wait all of twenty minutes to get my X-Ray results back.

To say that they're all overreacting would be an understatement but I get it, I understand their worry after everything that's happened so I've let them show their care without making inappropriate jokes which I personally think is a big achievement for me.

"I don't understand why it's taking so fucking long" Blake growls as he continues to get his 10k steps in for the day.

"Maybe because there's nothing actually wrong with me and you're all overreacting" I offer as an explanation and the way all three of them glare at me tells me they don't appreciate my input right now.

Not like it's my health we're discussing here or anything.

"Wallace said it was too early to fly but you wouldn't listen" Finn now says and it's times like this that I wonder why I chose to have four boyfriends nagging at me instead of one.

I don't say that part out loud cause I can only imagine the reaction I'd get and in truth I wouldn't even think of changing a single thing about them.

Instead of continuing to let them stew I decide to give them something to do.

"God I'm really hungry" I say.

I'm not hungry in the slightest but just as expected it works a treat.

Both Blake and Finn jump into action and mutter something about finding me something to eat as they disappear out of my hospital room.

"You really do know how to play us don't you" Cian mumbles as he comes over and sits himself on the bed next to me.

He's not wrong I do know exactly what to do with each of them and at moments like this I have to use it to my advantage.

I don't say anything I just smile widely at him and he puts his arm around me settling us both back on the bed.

"We were talking before you came out" he says absentmindedly and that definitely piques my interest.

Cian is the main one out of them all that doesn't like keeping things from me so I know whatever it was about he's going to tell me.

"Oh yeah what about?" I ask opening the space for him to tell what he needs to.

"About getting out, finally putting everything behind us and leading normal lives" he sighs but whereas the thought of them putting everything behind them fills me with so much hopefulness and joy, he doesn't seem to be feeling the same way.

"Right" I say hesitantly. "Don't you like the idea?" I then ask kind of scared for the answer.

"No of course I do" He replies shaking his head and then goes on to say. "I just don't know what I'd do"

There's so much unsurety in his tone it actually breaks my heart and I already know what's probably going on in his head right now.

He's thinking that he doesn't have the skills to do anything else, completely doubting his own abilities.

It's one of the things I've never quite understood about Cian. How he lacks so much confidence in himself and who he is when I can't help but think he's one of the best people I've ever met in my life.

"I always thought I wanted to work in events but after what happened I think I've changed my mind" I scoff trying to be lighthearted.

He hums his agreement but he's way too quiet for my liking so I decide to continue, filling the silence between us until he feels like he can talk to me.

"We could go on some holidays, you know really enjoy ourselves for a while" I offer as an idea.

It's not like he has to figure it all out now and in truth I'd much rather be able to spend some time with them all, especially after how hectic things have been.

"and I dunno I guess over anything else I'd want to start a family" I say and then regret the words straight away.

I don't even know why I even said it, it's not like any of us have ever talked about kids or starting a family. We've only just managed to figure out this whole relationship without Hugh having a fit every five minutes.

It's completely silent between us for way too long but when I'm about to ramble about not knowing why I said that he starts talking and stops me in my tracks.

"We thought you were pregnant" he says and I sit up straight away turning myself slightly to look at him. "Well Finn thought you were pregnant"

"Wait when?" I ask but he doesn't answer my question, instead he just keeps going.

"I've never really thought about it, I know Blakes always wanted kids of his own but the thought of having a baby with you wasn't terrifying" he says and that shocks me. 

"It wasn't?"

He shakes his head and I dunno why but the fact that he seems so content with the thought of starting a family fills me with this comforting feeling.

I want to talk about it more with him but I don't get chance and Finn comes barrelling back into the room with his arms filled with numerous snacks, Blake following in behind him his arms filled too.

"We got as much as we could find" Finn says as they both proceed to dump everything on the bed in front of me. 

"What did you do raid every vending machine?" I scoff.

"Yeah" he replies as if it doesn't mean anything at all. "So what we talking about?" he then says plopping himself onto the end of the bed. 

I'm about to say we were talking about their discussion on the jet but Cian beats me to it ad completely drops me in it. 

"Stas wants us all to start a family" he says as casually as anything, not like he's just dropped the bomb of the century and from the way both Finn's and Blake's faces drop I worry that this certain bomb is about to fuck absolutely everything.