An Apocalyptic Invasion

i make a terrible mistake

I abruptly woke up on the same morning.

It was barely light out, and I had a strange craving for something I didn't expect.

I rushed downstairs and went to the storage room, looking through the packs of drugs.

I injected one of the drugs using a needle and felt my body shiver as it entered my system.

Not surprisingly, I found myself doing more and more until I was desperately ripping the packs open with my teeth.

I heard someone come in, and saw Riley snatching the drugs away from me and throwing them into a bin.

"What are you doing?" she demanded.

"Give it back."

"No! You are NOT using drugs to get out of this. I'm not letting you destroy yourself more."

I made a grab at one, but she dragged me away before I could succeed.

"Carlos, stop it. Don't do this to yourself."

"I'll be fine. It's just a little bit."

"Yes, and from that 'little bit' you were ransacking through them like an animal."

"Hey, you didn't do anything to stop me in the morning," I snapped. At this point, the drugs got to me.

And Riley knew it. "Even though you won't admit it, you're in trouble. I still love you- and always will- but I can't bear to see you like this."

"I can leave right now and save you the trouble."

"It's not about leaving. It's about you taking care of yourself."

I didn't realize that she was taking care of me, after years of me doing the same.

My eye twitched. "Okay."

"I'm not going to mention this to anyone," she said. "But you have to be careful, alright? I love you."

"I do too."

She helped me upstairs and led me into her room.

"Why did you decide on the drugs?"

I rubbed my head. "It gives me more satisfaction."

"It's deadlier than alcohol. You know that, right?"

I looked at the hem of my shirt and mumbled, "Yes."

"For the first time in my life, I was actually scared of you."

I have no idea why that gave me satisfaction, but it did. "Really?"

"You just... it wasn't you anymore. Everything that you've been through kind of, just, rushed out."

"I noticed."

I stared out the window. I didn't really remember what happened that morning, but I took her word for it.

Carlos zoned out, his eyes fixed on a cow outside.

"Are you okay?"

"Hm?" He stirred and looked at me. "Oh. Of course I am."

No, you're not. You're lying to me, and we both know it. I couldn't bring myself to say those words out loud.

I rubbed his arm. "Do you... do you wanna go on a walk?"

"I'd like that."

He still had that empty look to his eyes- as if he was somewhere else, a place I couldn't reach.

I couldn't hold it in anymore. "What is the matter with you?"

He stared at me. "What?"

"You're just so... you don't even seem to be here at this point. Even now, you're zoning out as if you don't care about me being with you anymore."