Good Morning Greetings {PhAn} [Completed]

Kickable

The kickable can stands near my feet annoyingly and I nudge it away with my foot, harshly.

Clink.

It rings loud enough for me to hear. It was still in my line of sight, so I kick it again.

Crash.

A loud alarm sounds. Did I just break a car window? I better go.

"Hey! Who did this to my car?!"

SHIT CRAP SHIT FLAPJACK FUCK ARGH RUNNNNNNN!

I finally get far away enough from the car. Maybe I should've just confessed to my heinous crime. I mean, I could've just paid for the damage, I'm sure. The lady would understand it was just an accident, right?

Well, too late now. I hope I don't get arrested. No one should follow my example. But hey, new video idea. Look out for that one next week.

What am I doing?

I'm supposed to be buying more milk, since we ran out this morning. My hands move around to find my phone and I unlock it quickly.

'Hey. Getting milk later. I'll be home late.' I text to Phil. He responds a minute later.

'K. Could you also get Chinese, seeing as you havent bought anything yet?'

'Sure. Why can't you just order?'

'Lazy. :P'

I sigh and put the phone back into my pocket, walking to the shop. Milk and Chinese. How am I supposed to walk all the way home with that?

I swear, Phil forgets that we're peasants and that we don't have a car. I guess it would be better if we did... nah. We never go out, anyways.

My phone vibrates again and I look at the new text.

'nvm. We'll order when you get back. just get milk. Thx'

Well, thanks. Not like I was halfway there or anything.

•☆•☆•☆•

I knock on the door. The one day I forget to bring my keys, really? "Open up! I forgot my keys!"

"How do I know you're not a kidnapper?" A muffled voice asks.

I groan and kick the door lightly in frustration. "Shut up! Let me in, you spork!"

The door opens and Phil stares at me happily. "It is you! You sure took your time with shopping! I already ordered the food 'cause you took too long."

"Did you get the right order?"

"Yeah, yeah. I learned my lesson. Don't order chicken when Dan's in his no-meat fast and all."

"I'm a vegan, not a vegetarian. There's a difference, you know?"

Phil smiles pushes me in. "Come on. Put the milk away. You didn't get lactose, did you?"

"Yeah. I did. I want to slowly kill you by making you puke out your guts one carton at a time."

"Now I know your plan, so you shall never execute it."

"How do you know I might have not switched the milk?"

He stares at me in horror. "You wouldn't. You're too lazy for that."

I arch a brow. "Am I?"

He warily eyes the carbons standing on the counters and grabs them, slowly putting them inside the fridge.

"I think I'll start shopping for groceries from now on, yeah?"

I gasp, "wait! You can't do that!"

Phil puts his hands on his hips. "And why not?"

"Because that's my job. If you did that, then I'd have to do something you do."

"Do the laundry, then."

"But I'd rather stay in the kitchen and organize the plates and close the cupboard doors you leave open. And I like cooking a lot more then washing clothes."

"It's literally just throwing fabric into a machine and pouring detergent and softener into an area. It's not that hard of a job."

"I just find it not in my area of expertise."

"A five-year-old could do it."

"I'm four."

"Okay."

I stand there with my arms crossed and a determined face as Phil stares at me. "Fine. Let's just stick to our usual routine, then. Nothing wrong with that."

I shrug. "Nope. It should just stay the same."

He hums. "What we're we talking about again?"

"Uh-"

The doorbell rings and Phil perks up immediately. His face gleams and her shoots me a quick smile. "Food!"

I walk with him to the door and we open it together. "Yes, it's our food, you over-sized 8-year-old."

The man standing outside coughs and pushes the plastic bag of Chinese towards us. "Phil Lester?"

He grabs it kindly and thanks the man, giving him the needed notes.

The man awkwardly stands at the doorway, fiddling with his hat. "Sorry, but my daughter is a huge fan of you guys. Could I possibly get you to sign something for her?"

I scrunch my brows together and nod. "I guess. Are you going to tell her our address and let her stalk us...?"

"That would be a no. As a worker, I am not allowed to give such confidential information."

I sigh in relief, grabbing a sharpie nearby and taking the food from Phil's grasp, placing it on the floor. "Where would you like us to sign?"

The man looks around in confusion. "I don't have anything on me," he frowned.

Phil taps my shoulder. "Get that shirt Amazon accidentally sent us, will you?" He turns to the delivery guy, "it'll be okay. We've got this."

I rush to his room and see the shirt neatly folded up on top of his drawer. I take it and rush back. "Here. Sharpie as well. You can sign first."

He gladly takes it from me and signs the shirt, finishing off with his signature smiley face. I then do the same, put a colon before my name to make a smiley as well.

I hand the shirt to the man with a grateful smile. "What's her name?"

He stutters before answering. "M-Madeline."

"Could we see your phone? Maybe send her a short thank you video, you know?" Phil asks.

He whips out his phone and gives it to us, making sure it was on the recording screen.

"Hey, Madeline!" I start off, waving to the camera.

Phil pops in and continues. "You're awesome dad met us, and told us about you, so we wanted to thank you for watching us. Here's a hug!" he exclaims, hugging the tiny screen.

He turns the phone towards me. "And one from Dan as well."

I give him a look of disbelief, before hugging the device as well. "Thanks! We love you!"

And the short video ends there.

The man grins at us. "My name is Dean. Thank you for that."

We grin back.