Just maybe

13 - Selfish

Selfish - someone who is selfish only thinks of their own advantage. Caring only about themselves without any thought for the needs or wishes of other people.

There were times where Azzi thought she was immune to seeing girls throw themselves literally at her best friend. She had witnessed it for the past few years and she had mustered the confidence to not let it affect her. Specially when she and Paige are just friends, she had endured the jealousy and hatred during those times where she didn't know she had feelings for her. She used to gaslight herself into thinking that she was just jealous because another girl would occupy Paige's time and that it had nothing to do with her being attracted to her best friend. For the last few years, she had watched her in the distance doing all the things she was doing now to her but to another girl and she can't help but wonder if Paige thinks she's different from all those other girls she'd been with. Closing her eyes, she sighed softly.

Paige removed her lips on the soft spot on her neck, gazing down at her. Their forehead touching, "What are you thinking?" She asked watching as her brown eyes opened slowly. She blinked twice looking up at her.

"Nothing." Azzi mumbled before leaning in to kiss the blonde but Paige pulled away not letting her distract her.

"Something's on your mind,what is it baby?"

The younger girl sighed not really wanting to share her thoughts yet, "Do we really have to talk about this now?" She asked gripping her hips tighter.

Paige's hand squeezed her waist softly before caressing her stomach gently, easing her taut muscles. "Yes. It looks like it's bothering you so I want to know what you're thinking." She knew Azzi was an over thinker and it was clear that something is worrying her.

"I just— I just wanna know if — you know I'm not experienced with this thing considering I've only been — with—with guys before and I—" she could feel her chest heaved, the words tumbling out of her mouth in a nervous manner. Her cheeks flushed, both from the heated kiss they had shared earlier and from her embarrassment. "I was just thinking if I'm doing everything right?"

The look on her face made it hard for Paige not to laugh, she looked so worried and the way she bit her bottom lip, a mannerisms she do whenever she's nervous was something the blonde finds so attractive. Her eyes so big and innocent, looking up at her like her life depended on what her answer would be. "Az, you have nothing to worry about. If anything, you're actually pretty damn good. You don't have to worry about that stuff."

"Really? Because you know you can always tell me the truth right? And I won't be mad if you think I'm not doing enough to satisfy you."

"Babe, you have no idea how satisfied I am no matter what. Just having you cuddled up in my arms is enough. Even if we don't do anything other than be with each other's arms and watch Frozen for the hundredth time sharing a mint chocolate and strawberry Ice cream was enough. Hearing you talk about random stuff and laugh at my lame jokes was enough. You are enough and I am one hundred percent sure I am satisfied by having your presence."

"I just can't help but think about all the other girls you've been with and I can't help but worry if I'll be ever be as good as them." The insecurity was heavy on her voice.

Paige sighed, she didn't know why Azzi could think something like this considering how she was literally the most amazing girl she had ever met. "Az, stop." She watched as Azzi bit the inside of her cheek, her doe eyes staring back at her. "I wanna know what brought this thought to your head?"

"I heard McKenzie and her friends at one of the bathroom at campus the other day. They didn't know I was in one of the stalls."she looked down shyly. "They were talking about how she knows you too well. She said I'm not experienced enough when it comes to what you need. She said I was too sweet for your taste and that you'll eventually get bored."