𝐍𝐎 𝐁𝐎𝐃𝐘, 𝐍𝐎 𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐄.양중원

boys will be boys

this chapter will contain sensitive themes.

'I'm so sick of running as fast as I can.

Wondering if I'd get there quicker

If I was a man.'

'tuesday, 2nd october, 12:48pm.'

JIHYE and minji sit at their usual lunchtime bench, waiting for yunah to come along. jihye's burning with boundless curiosity, wondering what asami's relationship with minjun really is- was?- is..?

she's also curious as to how jungwon's getting along with.. well, talking to haruto, but she's not too worried, seeing as he's made lots of social improvement.

she can't help but feel that this is getting serious. that minjun's personality is well, was not just black and white. it held many different colours, those that jungwon and herself had yet to discover.

they had been taking their mini-investigation into minjun lightly, but, soon they'd realise, it'd take over their lives.

jihye notices asami walking with her friends, and puts her chopsticks down, standing up from her bench in a rush. minji notices her rush, and chuckles. "where are you off too in such a rush? having lunch with your man?"

jihye pauses, raising an eyebrow. "my- what?"

"your man." minji wriggles her eyebrows. 

"shut up." jihye scoffs, packing her bag quickly.

"didn't you call me, panicking about what to wear when he invited-"

"OKAY-! okay, that's enough there." jihye chuckles nervously, patting minji's back, and taking a piece of kimbap from her lunch. "i'd never ditch my friends for a boy. i need to talk to asami quickly. love you!"

jihye rushes away, minji merely chuckling at her friends' antics, as yunah approaches, a bewildered expression on her face.

"who knows." minji responds, as if reading her mind, as the two girls sit and eat their lunch.

"asami! hey- can- can we talk?" jihye pants a little, as asami giggles. "yeah, 'course. did you run?"

jihye nods, chuckling breathlessly, as asami hands her some water from her bottle.

jihye and asami aren't best friends or anything, but the two have lots in common - and jihye loves that girl. asami is soft spoken, and yet, she's never hesitant to speak for others. she's kind, even when responding to hostility, and, she's an extremely good leader.

jihye smiles at her, handing it back. "thanks. lets go somewhere private, yeah? some people love to gossip."

the two girls cram into a toilet stall, dropping their bags on the ground. jihye sits on her bag, opposite asami, who puts the toilet seat down, sitting on it, bringing out a shiny, purple tube.

"is that..?"

"yeah. i trust you won't snitch?" asami hums, taking a puff.

"of course. is everything.. alright?" jihye frowns, concerned.

jihye has her own secrets.

before whenever her mom would act up, she had no way of stress relief. not until her old friends introduced her to vaping.

the ecstasy of feeling numb from her emotions helped her to the point that she was on the brink of addiction - until her dad found out. but, instead of being angry, he was kind and understanding, per usual. of course, he still scolded her, and yes, tears were still drawn, but, she gave it all up, once she realised that that was not the life she wanted to lead.

and she feels for asami.

because she knows how it feels like to be so hopeless to the point you rely on flavored air to make yourself feel better.

"yeah. the usual shit." asami chuckles, offering a puff to jihye. jihye nods no softly, clearing her throat. "is it.. minjun?"

asami sighs, resting her head in her hands. "im scared, jihye."

jihye frowns. "why?"

"just.. don't tell anyone, please.." asami starts, as jihye feels an unpleasant pang in the pits of her stomach. jihye swallows, clearing her throat. "ill be honest. i'd have to tell jungwon."

asami frowns. "jung..won?"

"yeah."

"i thought you- you guys..?"

"don't ask. we're- we're looking into minjun's disappearance, but, uhm.. im not sure if i want to find him anymore." jihye sighs, looking at the decorated wall filled with vulgar graphics and crude language.
asami sobs, and jihye widens her eyes, moving to hug her. "shit, asami. im so sorry. we don't have to talk about it-"

"no, no. its fine. it'd be nice to tell someone," she sniffles, wiping her tears. "who's jungwon gonna tell anyways?" she smiles a little, trying to crack a joke.

the thing that's cracking is jihye's heart.

seeing someone who's normally so put together so vunerable and weak hurts.

"minjun and i have been together since last year..."  

jihye nods, a silent beckon to let her continue.

"obviously, we were.. you know, intimate.." asami begins, as jihye stiffens. that familiar taste of bile creeps up again, as she feels unsettled once again. 

"we were arguing because someone saw him with another girl at some.. party-"

"when was this?" jihye cuts off, raising her eyebrow. party..?

"you know that weekend for the search party?"

"yeah..?"

"the weekend before that, on saturday."

"and you two were arguing on wednesday."

asami nods, before tilting her head. "how do you know that?"

"i heard a little. sorry." jihye winces, lying through her teeth. it's not fair to bring wonyoung's name into this, after all.

"but we weren't arguing about the party then. we were arguing about the party on monday, and then again on tuesday. but on tuesday, he said.." she sniffles, hands shaky. "he had videos of me, and that if i broke up with him, he'd send them to everyone."

jihye clenches her fist.

anger and disgust.

that's all she can feel as she moves to hug asami, biting her lip to hold back her pure, seething anger.

it seems she's uncovered some of minjun's true colours--

and she's not sure if she wants to find him anymore.