86 Feelings (Stan x Kenny)[Completed]

3

(Day 182)

Stan wished so fervently that he could avoid Kenny at this point.

It was always the same, though; every time he tried to avoid being around Kenny, something, or someone, pulled them back together. And with Wendy and Tammy being friends now, they had to see each other more than Stan could handle, but when Kenny began insisting on hanging out with him and Kyle, it became too much.

Actually, since the first day, it had been too much. Six months of pure torture dragged on. Stan knew by this time that it was more than a crush, more than just a game with lust - he'd fallen too far.

It wasn't fucking fair, either. Stan tried to be a good person, he really did, but he didn't know what to think about himself after endlessly fantasizing about Kenny. It wasn't just about sex either, everything about the intriguing line cook drove him crazy. Maybe if they didn't click so well it would've been easier to ignore; Stan felt like Kenny was a missing piece of the puzzle that should've been there all along.

I'm losing my fucking mind! Stan gnawed at his thumb as he stared at the POS with only half of his table's order put it. He couldn't focus. Fuck! I can't do this over a guy, not after all the shit I've been through to get to this point! Wendy has been there for me, she doesn't deserve this..

As if on cue, Stan's attention was pulled across the kitchen where Wendy was laughing at something Tolkien said. She placed a hand on his shoulder, leaning against him slightly as she continued giggling. It should've made him angry, furious even, but Stan only rolled his eyes at them. He couldn't worry about anything else lately; Kenny had invaded every crevasse in his mind, and Stan didn't have any space left for himself. He was frustrated beyond belief.

Absorbed in his own thoughts, Stan nearly knocked everything out of Kyle's arms as he turned the corner. They narrowly missed each other, though Kyle wasn't shy about sharing his feelings: "Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you?! This is why we're supposed to say 'corner', Stan!"

Avoiding the piercing green eyes of his super best friend, Stan pushed his notepad into the apron around his waist. "Sorry, Ky.."

Of course, Kyle wasn't blind to the idiotic way Stan had been acting. Six months was a long time to hang onto a crush, and the ginger was beginning to wonder how deep this really went. Since they were at work though, he decided to save his questions for later. "We're talking later at home. This is getting out of hand, dude, I can't watch you do this to yourself. I've developed a whole-ass relationship with David, and you're still stuck where you were six months ago!"

Fighting the urge to glance at the line, where he swore he could feel Kenny's eyes burning into him, Stan only nodded before he continued to the dining room. He hated how valid Kyle's concerns were, too.

Stan shut down his thoughts.

The rest of the night played out the same way - Stan wanted to remain in the numbness of his mind. Distracting himself with work was the only thing that helped lately, which he also never imagined. There was too much unpredictability going on, and he fucking hated it.

Stan wished everything was still as simple as it was when they were kids. Nothing was easy. Even the things that used to come like second nature couldn't claw their way through the walls of trauma, and altering experiences.

Kenny's presence was also proof that things couldn't possibly be so uninvolved. He kept coming around, even when Stan tried his damndest to give off hateful, furious energy - Kenny was always there to make him forget why he had those walls up in the first place.