Tum Se

17

People ruin each other in unspeakable ways and declare their innocence by calling it love. They often misunderstand their care for each other into love. They often take their minor jealousy into love. They often take their attractions into love. They often create the wrong conception of love. And then they say love is shit. No, you are shit. Your way of thinking is shit. Your misconceptions are shit. Your misunderstandings are shit. Your commitment issues are shit. Not love.
It's really hard to find a true love, that consumes you to an extent where you like being consumed by it. And that's what happened with Nandini. For the first time ever, she found a love that reciprocated her consummation. She was loved just as she loved. It was not just her in that relationship. There is an equal contribution of her husband as well and now finally knowing this, she doesn't want to let go of him because she knows he won't leave her. Why would he? After all he was the one who gradually started replacing her insecurities with his love.
She was happy with her life finally. She didn't demand anything now. She was more than satisfied with her life, just like now, cooking for Biji, with her sister in law and her bestie who understood her ever since she started realising things.
"Bhabhi let's go."
Her trance broke when she heard Ana calling out to her. She looked at her and then at Navya who was lost in herself since morning. They had to talk.
Nandini: Uhh Ana tu chal. Mai aur Navya aate Hain.
Ana nodded at her and went out. Navya, who was still not attentive to what was happening, got startled when Nandini kept her hand on her shoulder.
Nandini: Hua kya hai tujhe?
Navya looked down, contemplating whether to lie or open her heart out because she didn't want to stress Nandini when finally she was happy. Yes, she would lie. As soon as she looked up, all her determination flew, as her eyes found Nandini's warm and comforting ones. She held Nandini's hand and tears started streaming her eyes.
Navya: Nandini, I'm afraid.
Nandini: Afraid? But why?
Navya: Nandini, with Fab5 back I don't know what would happen in the near future, what revelations would be made, what regrets would replace this hatred and aggression, what feelings would gather in our family's hearts. I.. These thoughts scare me Nandini. What if our happy bubble bursts?
Nandini looked at Navya who was going paranoid. She held her shoulders firmly and made her look at herself.
Nandini: Navya, life, is unpredictable. You never know what may happen and the biggest example of this is our current life. As much as we hated this, we are happy with our lives now. Thus this phrase that Jo hota hai woh ache ke liye hota hai, is true. Aur rahi baat revelations ki toh ek na ek din saari sachayi sabke saamne aani hee hai and that day would be the real test of our family. Isliye, stop worrying for now. Ok?
Navya nodded in agreement. She felt relieved. These thoughts were eating her up the whole night. She hugged Nandini and then went out on Nandini's commands. As the tension flew out from Navya's mind, it transferred itself to Nandini's mind. She was worried about each and everyone. What about Cabir? He would break down real bad when he comes to know the truth. He will blame himself to death that he didn't trust her, his sister and lost Navya as well. What about Mukti? The time when she broke for the first time made her a dangerous person, a danger that she didn't want to become, now the consequences would be worst when she comes to know that this time it's her who broke people, it's her because of whom she lost the most important people in her life. What about Manik? What would he feel when he comes to know that it was him who was wrong and not Nandini? When he'll come to know that he lost the only person who truly cared for him, only because he didn't trust on her? When he will come to know about Ahana? Will he be able to forgive himself? Moreover, what about Abhiman? Would his insecurities return back with those memories, if that's what you could call them? Before her thoughts could run wilder, she heard her father calling her. Yes, she only had one father, Mr Arman Singh Rathore, that's it.
"Nandini beta, kidhar hai tu?"
Nandini: Aayi Papa.
She shook her head as she heard the desperation in his voice to eat. She hurriedly walked out after instructing the helpers who set the table. As soon as she approached them, she was attacked by her family dearest's questions.
Arman: Nandini kya banaya hai tune? Khushboo toh badi achi aa rahi hai..
He asked excitingly rubbing his palms and before Nandini could answer him, Rudra also intervened in between.
Rudra: Leave all this. Can we focus on eating the food please? Bhabhi, khana kahan hai yaar?
Nandini was about to speak but was rudely interrupted by her hubby dearest.
Abhiman: Kuch bol kyu nahi rahi tum yaar? I don't like disobedience in matters of food Nandini. Food is bae.
Nandini made a haw face hearing the men's accusations.
Sakshi: Meri bacchi ko pareshaan mat karo tum log aur aap (to Arman) apni eating habits par thoda control kariye.
Arman made a face indicating he's hurt.
Arman: Aise kaise koi khaane par control kar sakta hai? Don't you know khaana hum Rathores ki shaan hai huh?
Nandini (to Abhiman): Agar khana itna hee important hai toh usi ke saath rehna, meri kya zaroorat?
Abhiman made a puppy face, he got up and held her hand.
Abhiman: Yaar dil se nahi bola tha, Dil pe mat le. Tu toh Jaan hai meri.
And that's it, unintentionally red colour leaked on Nandini's cheeks, slapping on his bicep, she walked forward while everyone laughed on the couple. Fab5 was watching them carefully, not because they were interested, except Dhruv, who was smiling as well, but simply because they were reminded of some beautiful memories. It pained Manik to see Nandini laughing, smiling, romancing and giving all her attention to some other man that's not him.
Ahana: mumma..bhook lagi hai
Nandni: de rhi hn beta
"Manik beta, tum bhi lo. Kahan khoye ho?"
Manik looked up and found Sakshi passing him the bowl of dal makhani, his favourite. He smiled faintly at her and took the bowl, serving himself some. As soon as he put one morsel in his mouth, the same good old taste hit his tongue. He closed his eyes involuntarily and relished its taste.
"Haye Nandini, maza aa gaya."
He heard Biji's voice and found Nandini smiling at her. So, his doubts were confirmed. It was indeed cooked by Nandini. She sat beside Abhiman who had Ahana in his lap and started serving Ahana saying you have to complete it okay? And then serve herself and him while he was staring at her lovingly. She was about to eat when she noticed that he was not eating. She looked at him and found him looking at her. She asked what in gestures to which he shook his head, ruffled his hair and looked down biting his lip.
Rudra: I can't believe it that you are my brother.
Abhiman's hand stopped near his mouth. He placed back the morsel and looked at Rudra confusingly.
Rudra: Matlab, ap ki biwi ne Itna acha khana banaya, subah se itni mehnat ki, ap k liye dressed up hui aur ap hai jo khud khaaye jaa rahe hai.
He made a tch sound and looked down and started eating but Abhiman was confused. What was that supposed to mean?
Abhiman: Kehna kya chahta hai tu?
Before Rudra could reply, Arman who had enough, spoke, in a rather disappointed tone.
Arman: I'm so disappointed with my sons. They can't even romance with their wives. Matlab yahi din aagayen hain ki ab in logon ko sikhana padega.
Abhiman pouted sightly while Rudra scratched his head. Nandini bit her inner cheek to stop herself from smiling and concentrated on her plate.
Ana: Arey, make her eat with your own hands, at least the first morsel you stupid.
Abhiman glared at her while Nandini widened her eyes in surprise. She looked down while placing back her hair lock behind her ear. Rudra nudged Abhiman and gestured him to make her eat. Abhiman cleared his throat and made a morsel and held it in his hand. He was somewhat hesitant. What if Nandini was feeling awkward?
Gayatri: Abhay...
She addressed him in a stern voice which made him look at her.
Gayatri: Arey dekh kya raha hai. Chal chal.
She pointed at the morsel and gestured towards Nandini who was red in embarrassment. He slowly raised his hand towards Nandini who looked at him shyly and that's it. They got lost. Just one look in your lover's eyes and there's no way out of them. He made her eat the morsel, slowly and gently which she did almost automatically, as if she was compelled by his eyes. They didn't know how long they were staring at each other when they heard some coughs, which were obviously fake. They both immediately parted and looking everywhere but their family. Everyone was smirking while the elders were smiling at them. Not surprisingly, even Abhimanyu was smiling at them because he was genuinely happy for his baby sister. After whole lot of two years, he saw her happy and he wanted her to stay happy no matter what and he vowed to keep her happy no matter what.
Vihaan: Yeh acha hai. Pehle toh romance karenge nahi Lekin jab karenge toh rukne ka Naam hee nahi lenge.
All were happy there was someone who was burning in jealousy and had cute angry pout on her face.
Ahana's angrily to Abhiman: dada.. I also want to eat with your hands making Nandni and everyone laugh at her.
Abhiman: okay dada ki jaan
Ana: oh God.. doll kitna jealous hoti to tum.
Ahana: He is my dada only. He loves me okay?
Ana: yeah but he also your mumma husband and loves her also, but also loves us as well.
Ahana: ha but he loves me more.
Ana: No he loves every one equally right Bhabhi? To which Ahana make a crying face.
Nandni: okay Ana don't tease her more. Baby yes your dada loves you only. Okay? Now come on eat your food.
Ana: Bhabhi why are you lying she said laughing
Ahana while crying turned towards Abhiman: dada you love me only na..
Abhiman: okay stop it Ana. That's enough now. Yes pumpkin I love you only more than anyone else making her eat the morsel to which se ate happily making a victory face at Ana.
While the Kapoor's were celebrating their little happy moment, there was someone, who after spending five years in agony and anger hidden in the disguise of silent revenge, was feeling like he lost a major part of himself, and he was feeling torn from inside for the first time because he lost her, his girlfriend, his only supporter. Seeing this scene didn't anger him, surprisingly, but took him back to the times when he didn't had to worry about himself because even before he could express his demand, it was already fulfilled by her, Nandini, his Nandini.
Flashback
There were times when Manik could be a child, a child who could demand anything and get it done right at that moment, a child who could express his emotions whenever he wanted to, without any second thoughts. Just like right now. He had a demand for eating his favourite dal makhani and that too cooked by Nandini and Nandini being the sweetest girlfriend ever, agreed even if it meant that she would have to miss her lectures. Manik was patiently waiting for her but now it had been 2 hours, two damned hours and his patience level has crossed all boundaries. He had called and texted her million times but she patiently answered them all saying one thing, I'll be right there and this annoyed him to no extent.
He picked up his guitar and started strumming its wires furiously. Just one look and anyone could see the aggression he held in that moment. Just then the door opened and Nandini peeped inside only to find her boyfriend pouring all his anger on that poor guitar.
Nandini (murmured): Aiyappa, please help.
Finally, after coaxing Aiyappa to help her, she went inside and approached him. He got aware of her presence from the jingle of her bangles but he ignored her. She kept the bag on the chair and back hugged him by encircling her arms around his neck.
Nandini: I'm sorry Na Mani. I was coming for you but you know how time consuming it is to cook your favourite dish. I'm sorry.. Please...
She said cutely but before he could melt, he immediately jerked off her arms and got up. He turned towards her to bash her but found her holding her ears while pouting cutely. He immediately turned around not being able resist her charms.
She smirked seeing him melting gradually and thought to execute her master plan. She opened the lunch box and the exotic aroma of the food hit his nostrils, which made him turn back. After all, how long a foodie could resist the charms of food?
Nandini smiled when she found him eyeing the food. He was literally a baby, her baby and she loved pampering him.
Nandini: Kya hua Manik? Tum toh gussa the na mujhse?
Manik looked at her and then elsewhere but finally found an excuse.
Manik: Haan toh? I'm angry with you naa, not this food. Look, it's so innocent and beautiful. It just wanted my attention. It's calling me, like aa Jaa Manik, eat me up please. How can I ignore this request huh?
Nandini nodded in agreement innocently but bit her lips to prevent smiling. She made him sit and served him while he was looking at her dreamily. She gave him the food and gestured him to eat but he was sitting still.
Nandini: Kya hua Manik? Don't you wanna eat now?
Mischief was still evident in her eyes which Manik knew but he was long gone from that playful mood. He held her hand and pulled her on the chair opposite to him. She got surprised when he gave her that plate and opened his mouth indicating that he wants to eat from her hand. She smiled and made him eat.
Manik: You won't leave me right?
He suddenly asked when Nandini was keeping everything back in that bag. She looked at him and found him staring at her differently. She sat on his lap and cupped his cheeks.
Nandini: Not unless you ask me to. But that won't happen right? So that means I'll always be with you, no matter what.
He smiled and kept his head on her chest, hugging her tight while she ruffled his hair gently. He looked up and pecked her lips innumerable times while she was giggling all the while. It's ironic right? How we never realize what may be our last words, what may be our last promise, what may be our last conversation, what may be the last moment we spend together, what may be our last day? We are just so over confident about our next, that we just go with the flow and regret that we couldn't hold that moment longer, in the future.
Flashback Ends
"Manik!"
He was brought out of his reverie when he heard his name being called. He looked up and found Ana calling him so he sat straight.
Ana: Are you alright?
Every cell in his body wanted to scream his pain, every muscle wanted to shout their wariness from pain, every vein wanted to pop with aggression, every tear wanted to escape.
Manik: I'm fine. I am sorry. I just zoned out.
Sakshi: Ekdum se kahan kho Gaye beta?
Manik looked at Nandini who looked straight into nothing as if she knew what got his mind.
Manik: This food reminded me of someone special Aunty. That's all.
Nandini's head snapped towards him and their eyes met. Vulnerability, helplessness, aggression, pain, restlessness, and memories were all that they ever felt. There was no love in that moment and that's what hurt them the most. Both of them were hurt. Before things could worsten Nandini looked away and started eating quietly.
Rudra: Ok, now breakfast is done so Fab5, today is an off so you guys can do whatever you want. We'll meet tomorrow and you guys can sign the contract tomorrow and start with your practice. Hope I'm clear.
This wasn't a question rather a statement. And Fab5 had no choice but to follow what they say so they nodded in agreement.
Nandini along with Sakshi was with Biji in her room, talking to her. It was a routine. Whenever Biji visited, Nandini used to spend time with her. She gets her peace back even if it's for time being, whenever she talks to Biji. She without even knowing her problem, spoke it all out and unknowingly biji gave her strength to fight.
Sakshi: Chaliye ab aap dono baatein kijiye mai chalti hoon.
She got up and went out. Now it was only Nandini and Biji.
Gayatri: Kaisi hai tu?
It wasn't just a way of greeting or initialising a conversation but a warm motherly concern.
Nandini: Khush hoon Biji.
Gayatri smiled and caressed her hair and Nandini immediately sat closer to her, holding her left hand.
Gayatri: Woh toh tu pehle bhi thi. Abhi ka Bata.
Nandini smiled and looked at their entwined hands.
Nandini: Ab sahi maaine mei khush hoon Biji. Pehle khush thi par adhoori thi par ab khush bhi hoon aur poori bhi.
Gayatri smiled at her and squeezed her hands in assurance.
Gayatri: Maine kaha tha na ki thoda waqt de sab theek ho jayega...
Nandini: Biji Ahana k bare mai Abhay k elawa kisi ko nhi pata.
Gayatri: ssh..koi zaroorat nhi hai. Wo teri aur Abhiman ki beti hai. Dekha tu ne kaise jaan basti hai dono ki ek dusre mai..aur humare Ghar ki ronak hai woh.. Rathores ka guroor. Ainda kabhi mai is bat k bare mai na suno.
Nandini nodded smiling and kissed her hands.
Nandini: Thank you Biji. Thank you for giving me this family, your love, for accepting me as your ideal daughter in law, for giving me a husband like Abhiman. Thank you for everything.
Gayatri smiled at her innocent grandchild and kissed her head.
Gayatri: My decision to choose you for Abhiman was absolutely correct and it's evident in the way Abhiman is smiling today. He became a careless boy who isolated himself from all of us but you brought him back to us, you became his moral support Nandu. Thank YOU for giving my Abhay back to me.
Nandini smiled admist her tears and nodded in a no, indicating not to thank her. She wiped her tears as well as Gayatri's and made her lie down, covering her with the blanket.
Nandini: Ab aap thodi derr aaram kijiye.
Sulekha nodded in agreement and Nandini came out, after putting off the lights. She saw the living area empty which meant everyone was in their rooms so she also decided to rest for a while and hence headed for her room as well. She was walking along the corridor of the third floor when she heard voices coming from Abhimanyu's room. Though she was a understanding person who never intruded anyone's privacy but certain things do need your attention, specially after you are the only family to your brother, whose personality has drastically changed. She walked closer towards the door and was about to go inside when she saw the door partly ajar and Mukti was shouting on Abhimanyu.
Mukti: You're a cheater as well. Just like that sister of yours.
Abhimanyu: Oh really? Then why are you here? Don't you know saints like you don't talk to sinners like us?
He said casually but Nandini knew her brother's heart was actually on fire the moment Mukti might've entered the room. Mukti didn't like this calmness and pounced on him, holding his collars.
Mukti: So I was actually right. You're just like Harshad. Playing with my heart. Toying with my body and as soon as you got your manly ego satisfied you left me on the pretext of us not trusting that bitch sister of yours.
Abhimanyu had enough, first she was comparing him to that womanizer and secondly she was calling his baby sister a bitch so he did the next possible thing that shocked both Nandini and Mukti, he slapped her. Hard. She fell on the floor with the intensity of his slap and looked at him wide eyed.
Abhimanyu(shouted): Enough is enough Mukti. You know when Nandini used to tell me that you are just a broken soul who needs to be loved as you're insecure, I thought maybe I should confront you and come back to you but once a bitch, always a bitch, aren't you?
Mukti's tears started flowing as she finally encountered a changed Abhimanyu. She got up and looked at him with her wide, teary eyes.
Abhimanyu: Dard hua Na? Meri behen ko bhi hua tha. In fact still hota hai. Whenever you and your friends address her with such words Mukti. You know what? YOU never loved me. In fact you never moved on from Harshad but Fab3's and your egos were destroyed which you all couldn't bear so you refused to forgive Harshad and you thought you fell in love with me because all you needed was attention which you got. In plenty in fact. And this is exactly what happened with Manik as well. Aur pata hai Mukti, tum aaj bhi mujhse pyaar nahi karti, you are just here because your ego is still unsatisfied, just like Manik. For God's sake, stop trying to ruin my sister's and my life. Just leave us alone, just like five years back. Get out.
Mukti was standing rooted on her place and Nandini mirrored her actions. She could feel her brother's pain, his anger, his aggression, everything. It took every ounce of hers to stop herself and hug her brother tight but she knew Abhimanyu needed some alone time to gather himself. But one thing Nandini realised was that he needed to move on, only for better and she would help him to do that. Mukti isn't the right girl anymore. She can't heal his broken heart when she herself plays the victim.
Nandini walked away lost in her thoughts when out of nowhere, she was pulled by someone in a room. Panicked she looked up and found the most unexpected person-Manik.
Nandini: What the hell Manik! What do you want?
She was already tensed about Abhimanyu and Manik's act only added to her frustration and on top of that, Abhiman is in the room, just beside this. What if he comes to know that she's with Manik, alone in his room? His insecurity would definitely get the best of him. This increased her anxiety but she hid it cleverly because she couldn't let Manik have even the slightest of idea about this.
She looked at him and found him staring at her without even blinking. She tried to push him back from his chest but he caught hold of her hands and pinned them to the wall above her head with one hand while his other hand was holding her waist tightly.
Manik: Stop struggling Nandini.
Nandini scoffed at him and continued to twist her arms trying to break free.
Nandini: What makes you think that I'd listen to you, out of all people?
Manik(rolled his eyes): Of course.
Manik: Listen, I just want to talk to you after which I'll let you go.
Nandini gave him the most disgusting expressions which somehow made him conscious of himself.
Manik: What have you thought?
Nandini's face showed nothing but confusion.
Nandini: About?
Manik: What I said to you in the morning.
Nandini: You're still stuck there, even after all the reasons I told that you're worthless.
She was definitely testing Manik's patience but Manik Malhotra knew how to play. He traced his hand from her waist to her cheek through her chest.
Manik: Nandini we love each other and you and I, we both know it's so hard to live without each other. We both know how difficult these five years were for us.
Nandini's eyes turned soft and she wriggled to get his grip loosen on her hand and upon seeing her warm expressions he complied. She cupped his cheeks making him elated.
Nandini: You're right Manik. These five years were my worst nightmare. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, I couldn't breathe. It became so difficult for me to survive but somehow I did. And you know where the problem lies? You never loved me and you still don't love me Manik. You don't want me to runaway with you. You.. You have some stupid conspiracy. I know. I can read your eyes Manik. They don't hold anything for me except revenge and hatred. You still don't love me, you still don't crave me, you still don't want me.
Manik was short of words. He just kept looking into her eyes that were clouded with tears. She managed to make him speechless. She managed to make him aware that she knows it all. She managed to bowl him out. Just like every time. Before he could think of a comeback, she pushed him and ran out
On the other side, it was too much for Nandini. She ran inside her room and closed the sliding door. Before entering inside the bedroom, she wiped her tears made herself look presentable. As soon as she came inside, she was pinned to the side wall by her hubby dearest. She gasped and held his broad shoulders, as a reflex. Their faces were just inches apart. Their bodies stuck together. Their breaths mingled. Their heartbeats in sync.
Abhiman: You cried.
He said gently cupping her cheeks. She was shocked and in panic she started looking here and there.
Nandini: I.. I didn't.
Abhiman: I'm not asking you. I'm telling you, that you did.
Nandini looked down. She didn't know what to say. He made her look up by nudging her chin up and looked at her dead in the eye.
Abhiman: Tell me..
His voice so intimidating, his eyes demanded the truth out of her. She sighed. She decided to tell him the partial truth.
Nandini: I'm worried about bhai. He needs someone in his life who understands him but he isn't ready to move on. Just when I thought he's doing better than before Mukti came up with the past once again.
She narrated him the whole scene and some tears managed to escape. He sighed helplessly. Of course he wanted to see Abhi happy as well. He became a best friend after Arnav. Abhiman wiped her tears and hugged her close.
Abhiman: You don't need to worry Nandini. It's all destiny. Just like we got each other, Abhi would get his better half as well. And I know that soon is not too far. Don't lose your hope.
Nandini nodded in approval while hugging him tight.
Abhiman: Waise Nandiniiii..
He called her name suddenly playfully which made Nandini look at him.
Abhiman: Tum aaj kitna busy ho subah se. Mujhe toh thoda sa bhi time nahi Mila. I wanted to reward you for the delicious food that you made but you were busy. Now as you're free, why don't I reward you, hmm?
Nandini suddenly grew nervous. What reward is he talking about? Abhiman who was enjoying till now, leaned towards her ears and whispered seductively.
Abhiman: How about some swim? It's been long. Don't you think?
Nandini felt her legs turn into jelly so she held his shoulder tightly as she felt his lips trailing soft kisses on her side neck and below her ear. She felt his hand on the back of her blouse slowly tracing his fingers over her smooth back, he opened the string of the blouse, making it lose. She pushed him and walked some distance from him when she felt a tug on her pallu (dupatta[scarf] of the saree). She immediately held it from her shoulder to prevent it from falling and looked back only to find him holding it. He pulled her closer to himself by tugging on it and muttered on her lips.
Abhiman: I'm giving you fifteen minutes, Mrs Rathore. I'll be waiting on the poolside. And for you information pumpkin is at Arnav place.
She blushed and snatched her pallu from his hand and ran inside the washroom.
Abhiman: Just 15 minutes Mrs Rathore. Don't make me wait any longer.
She heard his shout which made her smile. Abhiman too smiled and ruffled his hair. He had already made the arrangements for them in their indoor pool area as he knows Nandini won't be comfortable when Biji is there.
This moment of bliss was witnessed by someone, who hid immediately as he saw Abhiman approaching to lock the bedroom door and curtain it. Manik. He followed Nandini because honestly he thought he'd be able to convince her, not knowing Abhiman is in the room, but only to witness his ex sharing a moment of passion with her husband. He couldn't hear anything not that it bothered him but what he was seeing, definitely bothered him. In anger, he left from there, not before breaking the vase outside their room.