Two Sinners Make a Right {+18}

21. Let Me Lose Myself In You

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The night air is cool as me and Easton step outside the club. Easton walks beside me, silent, his jaw clenched in a way that tells me he's lost in thought.

I know he's angry, though not at me. It's himself he's battling, the guilt of dragging me into his world— a world I had no business stepping into, yet here I am. And he has no idea that I'm being pulled into a dangerous world already, and I'd take his world over Alex's any day.

     "Easton," I say softly, reaching out to touch his arm. He stops, turning to face me, his green eyes darker under the streetlights. I can feel his anger radiating off him.

     "I'm sorry," he says, his voice low and rough. "I said I didn't want you involved in this part of my life. You don't belong in this... in my world. I hate that I've pulled you into it."

     I shake my head, stepping closer, close enough to feel the heat of his body. "I can handle it. I'm stronger than you think."

     His eyes search mine, as if he's trying to find a reason to believe me. "You deserve more than this. More than I can give you. I can't offer you anything beyond this—" He gestures between us, the words heavy with meaning. "Just the physical."

     There it is. The reminder that I'm nothing more than a distraction, an escape. I should be fine with that. That's all I wanted too. But deep down, there's a part of me that aches for something more, something I can never have. Not with Easton, and certainly not with Alex.

     But I've made my choice. Im here now, with him, and I'm not backing down. I push away the thoughts of what can't be and focus on what is.

     "I don't need more," I say firmly, though the lie tastes bitter on my tongue. "I'm not asking for more." I look up at him, hoping the lie comes off as genuine. "No questions, remember? You don't have to involve me any more than I am, and I won't ask for details that you're not willing to give, okay?"

     For a moment, he just looks at me, his gaze intense and unreadable. Then he nods, accepting what I'm offering, even if it's not the whole truth. He turns away and walks towards his car, parked by the curb. I follow, the silence between us thick with unsaid things.

     When we're both inside, the doors shut with a heavy thud, sealing us in our own little world, I stare at him. He just sits there, staring out the windshield, hands gripping the steering wheel like he's trying to anchor himself. I can see the tension in his jaw, the way his breath comes a little too fast. He's still caught up in whatever's gnawing at him, and I can't stand it.

     I surprise myself when I slide over the centre console and climb into his lap, straddling him. His eyes snap to mine, just as surprised, but he doesn't move away. I cup his face in my hands, forcing him to look at me, to see me.

     "Let me lose myself in you," I whisper, my lips brushing against his. "Just for tonight, let us forget everything."

     My heart is pounding as I wait for him to respond, my breaths heavy. I've never, ever, done anything like this before and I'm terrified he'll reject me.