Half a heart

Chapter 54

Trigger Warnings: Anxiety, Mental Health, Emotional Distress

Charlie's POV

The arena was electric with the energy of thousands of fans, their cheers and screams echoing through the massive space. I could feel the vibrations under my feet as I stood side stage, watching the boys perform. They were in their element, completely at home in front of the crowd, and it made me smile to see them so happy. But even as I tried to focus on their performance, a heavy feeling settled in my chest, squeezing tighter with each passing minute.

I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to stave off the creeping sense of panic. It had been building ever since we arrived at the venue, the noise and the chaos overwhelming my senses. I thought I could handle it, thought I could push through for their sake. But now, standing here with the crowd's energy washing over me like a tidal wave, I wasn't so sure.

Jacob, who had been standing a few feet away, noticed my discomfort almost immediately. He stepped closer, his voice low and calm as he spoke to me. "You alright, Charlie?"

I nodded, even though I knew he could see right through it. My breathing was getting faster, shallower, and I felt the edges of my vision start to blur. The boys were only halfway through their set, and I didn't want to interrupt, but I couldn't help the anxiety that was spiraling out of control.

Jacob must have noticed the way I was gripping the hem of my shirt, my knuckles turning white. He placed a gentle hand on my shoulder, guiding me to sit down on a crate near the side of the stage. "Just breathe, mate. I'm right here."

I tried to follow his advice, but the roaring of the crowd seemed to grow louder, drowning out everything else. My heart was pounding in my chest, and it felt like I couldn't get enough air. Panic was setting in, and I fought to keep it at bay, but it was no use.

Jacob knelt in front of me, his expression full of concern. "Charlie, listen to me. Focus on my voice. You're safe, okay? You're safe."

I nodded weakly, but the fear was too strong. I felt trapped, like the walls were closing in around me. The noise, the lights, the sheer size of the crowd-it was all too much.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Harry on stage, his eyes scanning the crowd. But then, almost as if he sensed something was wrong, his gaze shifted to the side of the stage where I was. His eyes locked onto mine, and I saw the concern flash across his face.

Before I could register what was happening, Harry stopped mid-lyric, his microphone dropping to his side as he turned and bolted off the stage. The crowd's cheers faltered, confusion rippling through the arena, but Harry didn't stop. He was running toward me, his focus solely on reaching me.

The moment he reached me, Harry knelt down, his eyes searching mine. "Charlie, what's wrong? What's happening?"

"I-I can't..." I stammered, struggling to get the words out. The panic was suffocating me, and I could barely speak.

Harry wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a tight embrace. "It's okay, Charlie. I'm here. Just breathe with me, alright? In and out, nice and slow."

Jacob stepped back, giving Harry the space he needed to help me, but he stayed close, ready to assist if needed. Harry's voice was steady, calming, as he guided me through my breathing, his hand rubbing gentle circles on my back.

Slowly, ever so slowly, the panic began to ebb away. The noise of the crowd faded into the background as I focused on Harry's voice, his presence grounding me in the moment. I clung to him, my hands fisting in his shirt as I tried to match my breathing to his.

"It's alright, Charlie. I've got you," Harry murmured, his voice a soothing balm against the storm raging in my mind.

After what felt like an eternity, my breathing started to even out, the tightness in my chest loosening just enough for me to take a full breath. I buried my face in Harry's shoulder, trying to block out the remnants of the panic that still clung to me.

"Harry, the show..." I whispered, my voice shaky.

"Forget the show," Harry said firmly, pulling back just enough to look me in the eye. "You're more important."

The sincerity in his voice, the way he looked at me like I was the only thing that mattered, made tears well up in my eyes. I didn't want to cry, not here, not now, but I couldn't stop it. The tears spilled over, and I quickly wiped them away, embarrassed.

"Hey, it's okay," Harry said softly, brushing a tear off my cheek with his thumb. "You don't have to be strong all the time."

Just then, the rest of the boys appeared, concern etched on their faces. The concert had been paused, with the fans being told there was a technical issue. Paul was with them, his gaze flicking between Harry and me, assessing the situation.

"What happened?" Liam asked, his voice full of worry.

"Panic attack," Jacob explained quietly. "I was trying to calm him down, but Harry got here first."

Liam knelt down beside Harry, his hand resting on my shoulder. "You're okay, Charlie. We're all here now."

Zayn and Niall stood close by, both of them looking just as concerned. I felt a wave of guilt wash over me-I hadn't meant to cause such a scene, especially during their show.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, my voice breaking.

"Don't be," Niall said gently. "You didn't do anything wrong."

Zayn nodded in agreement. "We've got you, mate."

Harry's arms tightened around me again, his chin resting on top of my head. "Let's get you out of here, yeah?"

I nodded, too drained to argue. The boys stood as one, creating a protective barrier around me as we made our way backstage. The show could wait; right now, all that mattered was getting me to a place where I could breathe again.

As we walked, I leaned into Harry, letting him take most of my weight. My legs felt shaky, like they could give out at any moment, but with Harry's arm around me, I knew I wouldn't fall.

Jacob stayed close, his presence a comforting reminder that I wasn't alone. And as we left the stage behind, I felt a small flicker of relief. I didn't have to face this by myself-I had them.

And that made all the difference in the world.