It didn't take long before Serj called my father and me to talk to us about his decision. This was definitely a serious matter as he summoned us to the Romanov main house where only important occasions with the Bratva were being held, unlike before na si Serj pa ang pumupunta sa amin. Kaya naman ramdam ko ang kaba ni Dad sa tabi ko here sa backseat while we were on our way.
But I was trying not to get it on me, even though I was nervous as well. I didn't want to stress myself with the situation. Lalo pa at binilinan ako ng doctor to avoid stress as it wouldn't do well with my pregnancy. I tried so hard to forget what happened at the party dahil pakiramdam ko ay hindi ko kakayanin ang sakit at ang katotohonang iniwan na nga ako ni Devlin.
I took a deep breath. Ramdam ko kasing nag-iinit ang mga mata ko. Damn it. I told myself that I wouldn't cry over it again. It's not good for the baby. I need to stay strong dahil hindi na lang sarili ko ang kailangan kong alagaan.
Forget about Devlin. He's not worth it. If he doesn't want the baby, then so be it. Kaya kong palakihing mag-isa ang anak ko.
"It's alright, dochka," my father said beside me. "The Pakhan is merciful when it comes to his family and the Bratva. He didn't take back what he said that you can call him 'Serj', right?"
For a moment, I was lost. Hindi ko s'ya maintindihan pero umiling pa rin ako.
"No."
He nodded and looked relieved for some reason.
"That's good. You know how important nicknames are for us. Only our families and those close to us can call us by our diminutives. That means that the Pakhan still regards us as his family in the Bratva so it'll be alright."
I nodded, finally understood what he meant. Gusto ko pa sanang sabihin na hindi naman doon nakabase ang magiging desisyon ni Serj but if that's what would appease him, then I'll just let him.
Since Russians often have long names as names are quite a big deal in our culture, nicknames or diminutives were used by those people who we deemed important to us, like our family and friends. Kaya ganoon ang naisip ni Daddy. From the start, Serj insisted that I should call him by his nickname so it meant that I belonged to the Bratva family. Hindi n'ya binawi iyon sa kabila nang nangyari.
Natigilan ako. Realization suddenly hit me. Devlin never called me by my diminutive kahit na ilang beses ko na s'yang sinabihan that he could call me as Yeliz or Liza, as Yelizaveta was quite too long. I thought that he just wanted to maintain the formality between us, but even when we were in a relationship, he still called me by my first name. And he never told me to call him by his nickname too.
Ah... I should've realized it by then. Devlin didn't see me as someone important to him. Well, maybe he was pero hindi sa paraang gusto ko. I was important to him as he could use me against the Bratva.
God... I'm so fucking stupid.
"We're here."
We stopped at a traditional-looking house, but it was so huge that it could be mistaken for a castle. There were still some touches of modernity on the exterior but the traditional look was still preserved. There was also a wide front yard and there was even a fountain in the middle.
"I want you to behave, Yelizaveta," bulong sa 'kin ni Dad nang may sumalubong sa 'min pagbaba ng sasakyan. "You won't want to anger the Pakhan even more."
"Matvey Aslanov." The man greeted my father. "Proshlo mnogo vremeni."
"Leonid Ozerov." They shook hands before Dad looked at me. "This is my daughter, Yelizaveta Matveyevna Aslanova."