His Lost Heartbeat

Chapter 18

Saudamini,ek minute" Anirudh voice halted Saudamini. She turned back , quite surprised at his sudden call. Her eyes scanned him as he looked at Aadhya who was standing by his side, as if he was bracing himself for something and wanted her support.

Aadhya nodded slightly before she walked few steps away from there to give privacy to them. Hardly had she walked a few steps, when she felt a grip on her wrist . She stopped. Her eyes travelled from the masculine hand that was holding him to the man with whom the hand belongs. His eyes was stoic as  he was looking back at Saudamini.

As if sensing her gaze ,he turned towards her , the steadiness suddenly replaced with vulnerability as he urged her to be with him .The vulnerability that she had shown a few days ago when they had a argument regarding this case. He didn't want her to be anywhere around Saudamini while she had opposite thought.

"Kya aap ab bhi Saudamini ji se pyar karte hai?" She had asked this question when she thought that whatever resentment he had for Saudamini was a result of the pain of losing his love.

"Mai Mini se pyar nhi karta hu aur na hi kabhi karta tha " He yelled as soon as these  words escaped from her mouth , making her flinch from the intensity of the sound.

No soon had he shouted than he felt guilty for the same .He turned  back and walked towards the couch kept in an corner of his office and sat on it . Removing his spectacles, he took a deep breath.

Aadhya kept looking at him as he settled on the couch with his shoulder slumped,his face bowed down while his both hand clasped together in restless manner. She slowly walked towards him and sits beside him without saying anything.

Anirudh felt her movement till she settled beside him and waited for her to ask something but she didn't speak a word.

Clock ticked by but neither of them spoke anything ,finally Aniruddh broke the ice .

"Saudamini mere papa ke dost ki beti hai" He spoke without looking at her , this time in much calmer tone. "Uski aur meri shaadi bachpan se hi tai thi .Agar mai London nhi gya hota to shayad ho bhi gayi hoti"  He paused .He could feel her eyes on him but she didn't speak anything. Understanding that she was not going to speak anything, he continued .

"Bachpan se hi humare man me ye dala gya ki hum dono ek dusre ke jeevansaathi honge .Tab se hi jab se hum dono ko hi jeevansaathi ka matlab bhi nhi pta tha " He chuckled remembering those days when during the child play ,he didn't let anyone else to be husband of Saudamini because she was his too be wife. During those days,it looked exciting to know that his friend would be with him for his whole life  .They had made long list of games that they would play together after their marriage.

That's how childhood works.

"Dhire dhire waqt ke saath jab hum uss padav per pahuche jaha.....jaha log aksar log apne jeevansathi ke sapne dekhne lagte hai , khwab bunne lagte hai ....Humare pass un sapno me dekhne ke liye ek chehra tha .Ek shakal thi un khwabo ki " He didn't know why he was saying all this to her but know when he started speaking,he could not stop himself.  From years these things were buried deep inside his heart, making it a baggage. Now he could not ignore the lure of lessening this baggage.

"London me bhi jab bhi mai apne aane wali zindagi ke bare me sochta tha ,usme Mini hoti thi .Usse khat likhta ,apne dil ki saari baatein batata aur wo bhi mujhe kai khat likha karti thi . Dhire dhire dosti wala khat prem patr banne laga...." He said and felt her stiffness beside him . He looked at her briefly to know reason of her stiffness .She nodded at him to continue.

"Din bhar ki thakan ke baad , raato me baith kar socha karta tha ki Mini dikhti kaise hogi ,jab usse milunga to kya kahunga , usse shaadi ke baad zindagi kitni haseen ho jayegi ...."