Survival Instinct // Namkook

chapter 3 - we're not friends

The storm outside intensified, lightning cracking through the sky, momentarily illuminating the darkened room.  The sound of thunder echoed in the small space, but inside, the atmosphere had shifted. Though the tension was still palpable, there was something different between them now—a sense of understanding.

Jungkook, despite the weight of Namjoon’s stare, felt the need to keep talking. Not just to fill the silence, but because he wanted to. Namjoon had cracked the door open, even if just a little, and Jungkook didn’t want to lose this chance. Maybe it was time to talk about himself a bit.

“You know,” Jungkook said after a moment, leaning back against the wall of the room, “I wasn’t always… like this.” He gestured to himself, his disheveled clothes and rough appearance. “Before all of this… I was just some kid trying to figure things out.”

Namjoon’s eyes flicked toward him, but he remained silent, his expression unreadable. Jungkook took that as permission to continue.

“I grew up in Busan,” Jungkook said, his voice quieter now, more thoughtful. “Typical kid, I guess. My mom was always trying to keep me out of trouble. My dad… well, he was never really around, so it was just the two of us.”

Namjoon’s gaze sharpened slightly at the mention of Jungkook’s family, but he said nothing. Jungkook figured that meant Namjoon wasn’t about to open up about his own life, but that was fine. Jungkook didn’t expect him to. This was enough for now.

“I was good at school, but I didn’t really care about it much,” Jungkook continued, the words flowing more easily now that he’d started. “I just wanted to sing. I spent all my free time recording covers, messing around with music. That was my dream, you know? To make it big. To be somebody.”

Namjoon shifted slightly, his brow furrowing, as if the idea of having dreams—something as simple as that—was foreign to him.

Jungkook chuckled, the sound hollow. “Guess that sounds pretty dumb now, huh? With everything going on. It’s not like singing’s gonna save me out here.”

Namjoon didn’t respond right away, but after a beat, he said, “You were a singer?”

Jungkook blinked, surprised that Namjoon had actually asked a question, even if it was just to clarify. “Yeah,” he nodded. “Well, trying to be. Before everything went to hell. I was supposed to audition for a music company in Seoul. That was my big plan. I even saved up enough to move there.”

There was a pause, the storm outside raging louder, but inside, Namjoon seemed to be listening intently. Jungkook hadn’t expected that either, but it encouraged him to keep going.

“Then…” Jungkook’s voice faltered for a moment as memories of the outbreak flooded back. He took a breath, trying to steady himself. “Well, you know how it is. Everything fell apart. By the time I made it to Seoul, the city was already burning. People were panicking, the streets were chaos. And suddenly, nothing mattered anymore. Not music, not my plans, nothing.”

Namjoon’s face darkened slightly, as if he could relate, though he didn’t say anything. His posture was rigid, as though talking about the past stirred something he wasn’t willing to confront.

Jungkook noticed the shift and, sensing Namjoon wasn’t one to share easily, quickly redirected. “Anyway, I guess I was lucky. Found a group of people trying to escape the city. We stuck together for a while…my mum joined me and life seemed normal for a certain amount of time again... until it didn’t.” His voice dropped, haunted by the memory. “Turns out, surviving with others is harder than surviving alone.”

Namjoon’s eyes flashed with recognition at that. He knew the truth of those words too well.

“The small town we were staying at got attacked and my mother...yeah. Well, I’ve been on my own for a while now,” Jungkook admitted. “Learned a lot. But there’s only so much you can do alone, right?” He glanced up at Namjoon, gauging his reaction. “That’s why I’m serious about this 'getting to know each other'—thing. I know we don’t trust each other yet, but I’m willing to try. I don’t want to just survive. I want to live.”

For a moment, there was only the sound of rain slashing against the building. Namjoon stood still, his eyes scanning Jungkook as if searching for any sign of weakness, any hint of deception. But Jungkook was earnest, his words raw and real.

Namjoon let out a slow breath, his gaze hardening as he leaned back against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. “You think it’s that simple?” he asked, his voice low, almost cold. “You think wanting it is enough?”

Jungkook swallowed, knowing that Namjoon was challenging him, testing him. “No,” he said quietly, “I know it’s not enough. But it’s a start.”

Namjoon’s jaw clenched, and for a long time, he didn’t say anything. But Jungkook could see the flicker of something in his eyes—a hint of doubt, maybe even conflict. It was as if Namjoon was debating something internally, weighing Jungkook’s words against whatever darkness lay within himself.

Finally, Namjoon spoke, his voice rough. “You’re not like the others I’ve met.”

Jungkook raised an eyebrow, surprised by the admission. “Is that a good thing?”

Namjoon’s lips twitched, though it wasn’t quite a smile. “Depends.”

Jungkook let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Well… I’m not planning on screwing you over, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Namjoon chuckled darkly, the sound devoid of humor. “You’d be dead if you tried.”

Jungkook smirked, though there was no real humor in his expression either. “Yeah, I figured.”

They fell silent again, but this time, the tension had shifted into something more manageable. Jungkook could feel it—there was still a long way to go before Namjoon would fully trust him, but the wall between them had cracked, just a little.

Namjoon pushed off from the wall, his demeanor growing serious again. “If you’re serious about this… if you want my protection, you’re gonna have to prove it.”

Jungkook nodded. “I’m ready.”

Namjoon’s gaze hardened, his eyes locking with Jungkook’s. “We leave as soon as this storm dies down. We’ll move fast, stay low, and we won’t stop until I say so. You do exactly what I tell you, no questions. Remember?”

Jungkook rolled his eyes but remembered who was standing in front of him quickly so he nodded immediately. “Yeah. Will do.”

Namjoon’s eyes narrowed, and for a moment, he seemed to be considering something. Then, almost reluctantly, he added, “And don’t think we’re friends just because you’ve told me your life story. That’s not how this works.”

Jungkook gave a small smile, knowing better than to push his luck. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

Namjoon turned away, but Jungkook caught the briefest flicker of something in his expression—something like approval, or at the very least, acceptance. It wasn’t much, but in a world like this, it was enough.

As the storm raged outside, Jungkook leaned back against the cold wall, feeling a strange sense of relief. He wasn’t alone anymore. It wasn’t trust—not yet—but it was something.

And that was a start.