Just A Kid

9. Follow Your Heart

Julietta POV

Sinking down on to the porch swing I had never felt such pain in my life. It felt like he had ripped out my heart and stomped on it, like i meant nothing to him, like he didn't care.

I had believed him when he said he wanted to be my first, my last and my always but it was clear to me now that that was just a lie to get what he wanted from me.......but he didn't despite what my brother thinks.

Why couldn't Phil just let me be happy, let us be happy or on the other hand maybe he had just saved me from something I couldn't see before.

"Hey there you are" April says sitting next to me and wrapping an arm around me.

I lean into her resting my head on her shoulder as I let the tears continue to fall.

"You love him don't you" she says and i snap my head up to look at her and she smiles "I could see it in the way you were looking at him and I can tell from how much this is hurting you"

"It doesn't matter now" I sigh "he doesn't care"

"Sweeheart I don't think it's as simple as you think it is" she says stroking my hair "I think he did what he did becuase he cares, I think he thought he was doing the right thing becuase he didn't want you to lose your brother"

"I didn't want to lose him either" I sob "April why does it have to hurt so much"

"That's love for you" she chuckles "It's the most wonderful thing in the world but it can also cause so much pain"

"What do I do now? Where do I go from here?" I ask

"You follow your heart sweetie" she smiles "use the time apart from him to figure out how you feel, what you really want. Once you can answer those questions you will know exactly what to do"

"Why can't Phil see things the way you do?" I sigh

"Because when it comes to his little sister he's overprotective and a grade a asshole" she says "he might not see he was wrong now but he will"

As we sit in silence I find myself playing with the pearl pendant Damian had given me only the day before. Grasping it in my hand I pull hard and snap the chain from my neck. I raise my hand with the intention of throwing it away.

"Wait" April says grabbing my hand "don't do that. If he gave that to you it meant something and I know you will regret throwing it away"

"He said when he found out the meaning of this kind of pearl he knew he had to give to me" I say looking at it laying in my hand "maybe that was just a lie too"

"Jules believe me when I say to you that he hasn't lies to you and he never would" she says "you two always had something special I could see it even if your brother couldn't. I knew you would end up together, I hoped you would"

"Well we did for a moment" I say "and you heard him, it will never happen again"

"I wouldn't be so sure of that" she says hugging me tight "everything will work out you'll see. You will both realise what you want and what you need and then it will all become clear"

Damian POV

Placing my bags in the trunk of the waiting cab I take one last look at the beach house. Everything in me wanted to go find her, hold her close and never let go but I knew that time had passed.

I can only hope that one day she will understand why I did what I did. Becuase I didn't want her to lose the only family she has over me, I'm not worth that.

More importantly I did it because I love her, and I was painfully aware that I would now never get to tell her that.

I get in to the cab letting out a deep sigh as it pulls away. Everything had been so perfect and then I went and ruined it.

Maybe in time Phil would allow me to talk to him about it and maybe I will be able to convince him to let me be with her but knows how long that would take.

Who knows how long she would wait for me this time, if she waits for me at all.