Evening Sky [JoongDunk]

[17] And even when a long, long time passes like this

And even when a long, long time passes like this...

Dunk Natachai, it's still you.

Doesn't care how many seasons have passed between all of us, doesn't care how many prayers that I sent to make wind in Joong Archen's heart to blow to me, it won't change anything.

Because, It's you.

It's always you.

And learning that isn't hurting me anymore because I knew since the beginning...

For me,

It was a losing game.

-Rein

___

[This chapter contains some heavy contents like a suicidal act, drugs, alcohol, depression, panic, anxiety and mention of sexual acts, please suit yourself before reading]

___

18th July 2011

Dunk Natachai is disappearing, I can't find him after graduation.

I tried my best to talk with him again in the past months, but he despised me, just looking at me seemed to make him touched hell.

I'm sorry for him.

I want to say my condolences for his mother.

But it was too late...

I can't see him and talk to him again.

I also can't tell him that Joong is not abandoning him, Joong can't go to him because he still hasn't woken up yet.

Two months after that car accident, there is no significant improvement of his health. He still lay down helplessly in his hospital's room.

Phi Dunk, what should I do?

I'm terrified if he decides to not fight for life and never wake up again.

He's been so lifeless and acting weird in the past year. His mother seemed to notice that and chose to hide it from his father.

I pity him so much. I feel bad for him and I know I am always one of the reasons why he looks broken every single day.

14th August 2011

Joong Archen is finally awake.

But he looks like he regrets it, he looks like he would rather not wake up again.

It hurts my heart.

I wanna see his smile again.

20th August 2012

First day of college.

I got accepted into architecture, Joong said he liked my drawings when we were children. Since then, it was always my intention to become an architect. Can I do it?

Joong is accepted into business, his father told him so. He still looks different from the Joong I used to know, he never smiles again.

But another season has passed, I hope there is a day when I can make him smile again.

He looks so exhausted these days, I wonder what happened to him.

17th November 2012

Today Joong screamed at me because I went into his bedroom without his consent. It was my fault, but seeing his rage is terrifying me. Now I know how much Joong hates to see someone else in his most private place.