Disobedience

Chapter 24: Memory

Kimberly Jane

I yawned as I looked at my laptop screen. I wanted to focus on the briefing  that I was reading but I just couldn't. I didn't get a good night's sleep since I was up thinking what he could possibly be doing with girls. It's insanity but my brain wouldn't shut the hell up

However, no matter how much it was bothering me, I have to commit to my decision. I have to be the bigger person and the mature one, obviously.

"Come in," I said when I heard a couple of knocks. My heart skipped a beat, thinking it could possibly be him, but I knew that it couldn't be Elijah, because Elijah doesn't knock on my door. He barges in. The only knock he knew is when he's tapping his tîp against my hóle before he fúcks me—-Oh, god. I shouldn't be having thoughts like this at six in the morning.

"Attorney Wencezlao?" I heard a couple of male voices and when they pushed the door open, I saw two familiar boys who belong to Elijah's fraternity.

"Yes? How can I help you?" I shut my laptop and intertwined my fingers in front of me.

"Uh..." The other one who was wearing a cap trailed.

"Prez Elijah, wanted us to give this to you." The boy holding a paper bag said and put it on my desk. "Instead of day-drinking and doing early parties, Alpha Kappa Phi's giving out food to our professors as an appreciation gesture."

"Oh," Was all I could say for a moment. "That's a first and I'm curious, whose idea was that?"

"Prez Elijah." Sabay nilang sagot.

Hm, interesting.

"Well, thank you, boys." I smiled.

"You're welcome, Attorney." They both murmured and headed out of the door.

When I grabbed the bag and opened it, I saw the exact breakfast I would have in it: gluten free and low carb bagel with non-gmo cream cheese and another set with organic almond butter with strawberries, I also saw two low sugar with high protein coconut yogurt and there is also fresh orange juice with no ice in a cup holder.

"Dåmn." I said to myself and couldn't help but smile. He got everything I want to a T.

*.*.*.*.*.*

I ate the breakfast alright, but that doesn't change my perspective of our situation. Despite the negative feelings, I still feel like I did the right thing by setting boundaries. I care about Elijah, I really do or else I wouldn't have risked going to his brother, just to set him straight. I don't see a future with him because a future with him means possibly losing everything I have worked hard for.

Elijah is nineteen and god, I am already thirty-two years old. The gap alone will have the media eat me alive. My colleagues might lose respect for me because who in their right mind, especially a professor and lawyer would sleep with their student who is half their age?

I took a deep breath as my heels clicked on the tiled floors. I was on my way to my morning lecture and here I am spiraling with my thoughts.

I don't see him in my future because my life has nothing good to offer to him. Kimberly Jane Wencezlao's life has been and will always be complicated. There's my father running for a huge political position in the next election, which means more and more people will probe into my life. There goes my overbearing father by itself who wouldn't accept anyone I chose to be my partner for life unless one: he's a lawyer, two: benefits his political goals, and three: at least around my age.

And like I told Elijah, he's not set to live here in the Philippines. I knew that he would have to go back to America in a few months. When that happens, I'll move on with my life and he will with his, where he'd continue to study, probably meet a nice girl—--I really kinda die inside whenever I picture him with someone else.