Faces Of You

69

  Felix paced back and forth. He was nervous.

   “Lix, calm down, it'll be fine,” Yuqi said.

   “Yuqi, I am getting married in six minutes,” Felix stated.

   Yuqi fixed her dress.

   “Babe, you love him. It will all be okay,”

   Felix took a deep breath and nodded.

  “It is going to be fine,” Felix muttered.

  -

   Felix smiled a little as he walked down the aisle. The smile didn't quite reach his eyes.

   Everyone was staring at him. His friends, his family… Hyunjin. They were all staring.

   Felix reached the archway and smiled at his soon to be husband.

  Yoon smiled back.

  He was getting married.

~

    Felix shot up, a thin layer of sweat on his skin.

   He took a deep breath and tossed his blanket away from him.

His phone lit up.

Hyun
Are you up?

  Why was Hyunjin messaging?

Angel
Is something wrong?
Are you okay?
Is Sophia okay?

Hyun
Yeah
Everyone is fine
Do you want to go out for a little?
Grab a bite or something?

Angel
It's three in the morning
Are you sure everything is okay?

Hyun
Yeah
I just want to grab a bite

   That's how Felix ended up with Hyunjin at a seven-eleven eating taquitos and drinking slushies.

   “So, what are you doing up at three in the morning?” Hyunjin asked.

    “Dream woke me. What about you?”

   “Painting. What was the dream about?”

   Felix pursed his lips, “I was getting married to Yoon. Woke up complete freaked out,”

   “Really? I thought you'd like getting married to him,” Hyunjin said.

   The younger sighed, “I don't know. Maybe in like ten years I'd be happy to be married to Yoon, but I don't know…”

   Hyunjin pursed his lips. He might’ve been slightly bothered by the insinuation that Yoon and Felix might get married, but he wouldn’t say anything.

   “How old is Yoon again?” Hyunjin asked.

   “Thirty-five,”

    “And he’s been married before?”

   “Yup,”

  The brunet hummed.

  “Hyunjin,” Felix said.

  “Yea?”

   “Stop judging him,”

  Hyunjin looked at Felix. How did he know?

  “The hum, you do it when you are judging something or someone. You used to do it when I first met Royce,” Felix said.

  “Royce was a dick,” Hyunjin stated.

  “Royce was nice,”

“Royce wanted to date you,”

  “So, what? You were jealous?” Felix questioned with a laugh.

   Hyunjin nodded, “Yup, I was very much so jealous because I was like thousands of miles away,” he said.

   “I do admit that whenever I heard James or Sophia in the background when we were calling I got jealous,”

  “Looking back you had a right to be jealous especially with Sophia,”

Felix pursed his lips, it wasn’t really anything he wanted to think of.

“When I first saw the engagement photos it hurt a little, but I guess I understood. The last photo though, it hurt the most,” Felix said.

    Hyunjin pursed his lips, he knew why and he has pretty much regretted posting that photo since then.

   “Yeah, I didn’t really think when I posted that photo,” Hyunjin muttered.

  “I guess in hindsight it doesn’t matter because now I know you had no malicious intent behind it,”

  “It is still a bit messed up. I mean I said that it reminded me of you and to do that… it was just wrong,”

  Felix shrugged and took a drink of his slushie.

   “What are you going to tell Yoon?” Hyunjin asked.

     The younger bit his lip and stirred the straw in his cup.

   “He’s a nice guy and it has been a while since I have been with a nice guy. I mean he knows what he wants. He is good with kids and he wouldn’t mind having more. He is secure and safe,” Felix said.

Hyunjin nodded. Maybe it hurt a little, but maybe this is what needed to happen. Felix deserved better.

   “So, you are going to say yes?” Hyunjin questioned

   Felix shook his head, “I can’t. I mean I like him and maybe I could have a future with him under different circumstances, but I can’t lead him on. I thought you know, he is a great guy and I can be with him.

  Then the Charles thing started and he wasn’t the one I was calling when I needed to feel safe. I hate that it took him saying ‘I love you’ and proposing for me to realise it, so you know maybe that makes me a jerk, but I guess it is better than giving false hope,”

   It was most likely bad, but that gave Hyunjin a twinge of hope, hope that maybe they could be something.

  “Yoon is a nice guy and if you were marrying him I’d be happy for you,” Hyunjin said.

   “Even if you are a world class jerk sometimes, you are good about being happy for me when you need to,” Felix said softly.

    “It is because you deserve to be happy. You deserve everything, and if ever given the chance again… I would try to give you everything you want,”

  Felix took a breath.

“Hyunjin?” a woman’s voice said.