Survival

#30 How hard is it to be Number Two?

Five went to the hospital as soon as Diego called him. Lila tried to do it herself, but since she wasn't in the best condition, Diego called him himself, which was a double shock for Five.

When he ran into the hallway at the hospital, he looked quite distraught at the slightest, understandably very worried about Lila and their child. Diego was standing in the hallway, and when he saw his brother's expression, he didn't even wait for him to ask him a question and told him straight away what he knew, "they took her in for some tests, no one was here yet..."

Five nodded his head, "okay..." he breathed out, "thanks..." he was still a little out of breath as he ran and sat down on the chair that was in the hallway.

With Lila by his side, how many times did he feel like he was exactly how old he looked. But now he felt a hundred years old at the very least, and even his tense expression added a little something. He sat motionless, trying not to think of any horror scenarios. He didn't even notice when Diego sat down in the chair next to him.

"She'll be okay..." uttered Diego after a few minutes of silence. Five looked at him. "She and the baby will be okay. Lila is a fighter."

"She is..." agreed Five, he had seen it so many times over the years. They'd been in countless dangerous situations during their years on the subway, situations where they'd fallen into despair and Lila had always managed to get back up and fight again. He looked ahead of him again, "The strongest I know..." he was grateful to Diego for his words, but he didn't have the energy to respond any more.

So once again there was a brief silence.

"I understood it even then..." said Diego, he didn't say it very loudly, so for a moment Five wasn't even sure if he really said it. He looked at his brother again.

"What did you understand?"

"That I lost Lila... that time you two came back and I saw the bracelet on her wrist."

Five looked at him a little confused, not sure if now was the time and place he wanted to discuss this. But at the same time, this was the first time Diego had actually spoken to him, after everything that had happened, and he didn't look like he wanted to punch him at the moment. He didn't say anything in response, waiting to see if Diego would continues.

"It wasn't until hindsight that I realized she hadn't worn the one she got from me in a long time... I don't even know if she still has it."

Five wondered if this was a way to take his mind off worrying about Lila, after all, he had to worry about her too.

"In hindsight, I can also see that it was foolish to believe that would change when you've spent so much time together. It was just an overnight change for me!" Diego wasn't looking at Five, but in front of him. It was like he needed to get it out of his system, and Five was looking in front of him as well. "But I didn't want to accept the fact that I was probably her second choice all along... again, a number two."

Five looked at him, "what are you talking about?"

"I figured out that Lila was between us from the start... and I've told myself a few times years ago that I was just imagining things, especially when you seemed like a boy back then... but if not, if the three of us had met when we were the same age," he shook his head and sighed.

"I'm really afraid to ask where you're going with all this. And I'm not sure I want to deal with that right now."

"You were already dealing with a lot of things together... and you hated each other... even back then, she somehow chose you over me. You told me yourself that she was just using me to get to you."