serendipity ⤑ harry lewis

eighteen

"evie, you realise you're going to have to talk to me at some point, right?" harry chuckled awkwardly sitting across from me.

everyone apart from cal, harry and i had left by now and the pub would be closing soon. cal was talking to the owner at the bar whilst harry and i stiffly sat at the table.

"i know." i replied, bluntly.

"come on, let's walk back." he spoke softly, nodding his head to the door.

normally, i would have said no. i would've told harry he can go fuck himself and he should never talk to me again. but, as i watch him stare at me from across the table i can't bring myself to dismiss anything he is saying.

my head hung low as i lift myself off of the chair, my feet instantly aching due to the heels i had wore causing me to hiss in pain.

"y'alright?" harry asks as he watches me wince.

"shoes," i laugh, "they fucking kill"

"cal, we're walking back now. see you later," harry points to which cal nods, "come on, you."

i stare at him as we walk outside, the cold november air hitting hard. we stand still for a moment as he watches me with a humorous grin. it's almost infuriating how good he looks.

"are we going- or?" he laughs, pointing to the right direction.

"yep. slow and steady wins the race" i stumble.

he rolls his eyes before laughing, "oh, come on," he shocks me by picking me up, holding my back and legs, "we don't have time for this."

"i'm not even gonna fight it," i giggle, resting my head on to his shoulder as he walked at a comfortable pace.

"thanks, wouldn't look great." he laughed to himself.

"harry," i hum after a while, "we need to talk."

i don't know why i say it, but the general presence of harry makes me think back to my happiest. i'm always happiest with harry no matter what is going on.

"yes, fucking hell. yes. we do," he sighs in relief, "maybe not now; not sure i'm ready for the honesty."

i giggle before we come to a stop. "we're here, evie" he laughs.

"well, thank you" i laugh, brushing my dress and bowing, "are you coming up?"

"please." he whispers.

we walk down the hallway towards my apartment, with harry so close behind me that i can smell his aftershave.

we agree he will make a tea whilst i change. i have to take a few deep breaths whilst alone in the bathroom; trying to calm the nerves.

triple threat
evie: gonna have so much TEA in the morning
mia: i'm sat
gee: anticipation is killing me and it's been two minutes
mia: ethan???
gee: well if it's not harry i don't wanna hear it
gee: kidding
gee: kind of
mia: HAHAHA

i chuckle at the girls messages before heading downstairs in a t shirt and joggers, smiling at the boy before sitting beside him.

"hi."

"uh- hello," he laughs, tilting his head back at our awkwardness.

"i'm going first" i point as he nods, "you hurt me, harry. not just because katie was round but because you knew i would've understood and still left me in the dark. we know each other more than anybody else and i just wish you would've had some more faith and told me what was going on. you made me look like an idiot; made me second guess myself and my feelings. because, i do like you. i think erm- i think you're perfect for me but i can't have anything to do with you if you're going to lie to me. i want to feel secure and happy with you- it's what we deserve" my voice breaks slightly, but im determined to say everything i need and harry's eyes don't leave mine for a second, "i don't ever want to question where you are or what you are doing. i don't want to have the same relationship as all of our previous ones. you're perfect to me and i don't think i can handle you breaking me apart. if i truly believed we would never work, i would've walked away from you permanently, but i believe in us. i know we have something too special for me to let go of, so i'll fight for it and put my pride aside to work through whatever this is."

harry continues to nod his head throughout and i know he's listening to every word im saying. his brows furrow as he watches me talk, feeling the deep emotion connected to every thought.

"evie, i-" he stutters, "well, first of all i agree with everything you just said. i know we can work and i promise i wont be a waste of your time. i know i made a mistake and trust me, even those two short days taught me the biggest lesson. i can't live without you. from now on, i'll prove to you every day that you're my priority. no one can come close and i was stupid for ever thinking they could."

harry's words hit hard and i feel the heavy sentiment they carry. there is no universe i would ever dream of sending him away; he was made for me and i'm not ready to give that up over a stupid mistake.

if he's going to hurt me, at least i explored the greatest connection i've ever had with anybody. it's better to have loved and lost than never had loved at all. but, i swear i will never let him go.

"but, harry," i whispered as he looked at me with worried eyes, "we really do need to take it slow this time. i can't have this messing up again,"

he gave me a sympathetic look, "yeah, yes. of course,"

"thank you"

"i'm going to uh- get back now," he pointed to the door, "i'll see you tomorrow"

"oh, the fucking shoot!" i groaned as he chuckled, "see you."