Finding 4

Chapter 11

Marley

"What's wrong?" Keely asks me as I drive down the road, not having said anything ever since we left the store.

"Nothing," I mumble, keeping my eyes on the road.

"Come on Marley, something is clearly wrong." Tierny adds "what happened?"

"Nothing happened," I turn on my blinker and turn into our subdivision "I'm just tired."

We pull up to my house and I put the car in park, almost immediately climbing out. I grab the bag with batteries sitting inside of it and walk up to the house, my friends trailing behind me.

Brody is sitting on the couch with a sleeping Elijah, and football playing on the tv. He smiles at us and I continue walking into the kitchen to put the batteries in Elijah's toy.

So much for doing a good deed.

<>

A few hours later, after Brody taught my friends everything about football and they sat on the couch and watched the game with him, I find myself on the bathroom floor, my wrists stinging and blood dripping from them.

I've turned on the shower so that my family stays unaware of my activities.

My mind stops, even if it's for a moment, the focus has moved from the pain inside of me to the pain clawing away at my arms.

My mom.

Emily.

Mason.

It's all gone.

But one particular thing stays on my mind. Callum Lynch. I've tried so hard to get him out. To get his gorgeous blonde hair, and his perfect smile, and those blue eyes of his out of my head, but nothing works.

I'm not supposed to be thinking of him, I have a boyfriend. A good boyfriend. Because Mason is good.

"Marley?" Brody's voice fills my ears as he knocks on the door. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah all good," I choke out, trying to not sound suspicious. "I'm just having an everything shower."

"Okay..." I can hear the uncertainty in his voice, but he doesn't say anything else.

My hands shake and tremble as I grab a wad of toilet paper and hold it to my wrist, applying pressure. Bringing myself to my feet, I breathe heavily and wince at the feeling of my skin moving near the fresh cut.

I manage to strip out of my clothes, luckily not getting any blood on them as I do. When I step into the shower and the warm water rushes over me, I sag in relaxation, letting the sound of the running water and the feeling of my submerged body take over.

I drop my arms down, and despite the way the shower floor turns red and my wrists sting more than a bee being attacked, I just stand there.

Completely empty.

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"You didn't wash your hair," Brody says moments later when I walk into my bedroom.

"What?" I question.

"You said you were getting an everything shower," he gestures at me "but your hair is dry."

Well shit.

"Oh...uh...I just got tired I guess," I shrug and sit down on my mattress next to him. "Didn't feel like washing it."

"Come on Mar I'm not stupid," my panic rises at his words. "What's going on?"

"Nothings going on," I huff, trying to avoid this conversation.

"I know you Marley. You're my sister." He keeps going. "After mom died you became so...angry."

"I'm not angry." I whisper. 

"No you're right," he shakes his head "you're not angry. That's just what you mask the pain with."

"Brody-"

"Marley I'm serious." He pushes, "what's going on?"

I swallow down the truth, and the pain. Everything I want to say, I swallow it back and try to forget about it. Because I can't tell.

It's not like I matter anyway.

"I'm fine."

A/N

Sorry about the short chapter, I just wanted to get something out because I'm not sure if I'll be able to really get any chapters out for the next few days just because we have another hurricane coming for us and this one is probably actually gonna hit us lol