Ok so I came back from Guatemala 2 days ago and when I did
Anita called me mama
Idk how I should feel about this, I'm not her mama yet she thinks I am. She is still to little to understand that her mama is dead, and it's not like she remembers her mom anyways.
Her and her father came from Guatemala so I could help raise her, but I NEVER expected her to see me as her mom, although I guess I shoulda seen it coming.She ran up to me at the airport shouting, "Mama I missed you!"
And my heart just dropped. It immediately made me think of my sister and I almost started crying right there, I just looked at Zack and he grabbed my hand to tell me it was alright. Well, that was the only time she called me that, the rest of the day she called me Bina (she can't say Albin).
I thought it was all ok but then today she called me mama again. I was lying in bed with Zack and we were talking about our plans for the week (her dad had just left) when she crawled into bed with us. She leaned up toward me and "mama food?"
Idk what to do, I feel honored she calls me her mom but at the same time lost. Ay dios... I pretty much already am her mama, it's just the title makes it so much more official and with her dad working almost all the time to pay off the coyotes, me and Zack practically raise her. Also, if Juan's application for citizenship doesn't get approved then he will be sent back to Guatemala. We have decided that if he does not get approved then Anita will stay here with us. Anyways we should find out the results anytime between now and the next few months. I don't know how I will manage if he isn't approved :(..... Back to the name thing, I guess I let her do with what's comfortable with her and just start slowly letting her know what happened to her own mom. :/
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Cortés, Quetzals and growing up Guatemalan
General FictionNot many people realize what Guatemala is like- and the journey to immigrate and integrate yourself into another culture and world. Hopefully, this will help you realize and/or understand the struggles, triumphs and joys that come with being Mayan a...