Don't Let Me Go // h.s.

Part 37: Getting Her Back

Harry's pov
I walked quickly. I just wanted to be in my room. I didn't want to talk to anyone. The streets were busy with people trying to get home for dinner. The crowds were hard to move around. I just focused on getting home as fast as possible. I ignored the big aching hole in my chest. I tried to pretend it wasn't there but drained me. Walking became more difficult as I became more tired.

I walked through the door and I didn't know what I looked like. I assumed I was bad since the boys stood up as soon as I stepped in.

"What happened mate?" Louis tried to reach for me but I shrugged him off and kept walking. I was almost there.

"Harry, you look like you've been hit by a truck. Talk to us." Louis demanded.
I looked over at my open door. All I wanted was to lock the door and get away. I wanted to be alone.

"I screwed up. I don't know....she wasn't happy. I messed up." I tried to explain but I was overwhelmed. The big aching hole in my chest got bigger, consuming me.

I screamed out in frustration, angry tears spilling down my face. I was more angry than sad. I was mad at myself. I just tried to push away the only person who genuinely cared about me when I needed her to to stay.

"Hey, come here." Liam opened his arms but I didn't move. I just shook my head, but he walked up to me anyways.

"I pushed her away when she was begging me to let her stay and I didn't know what to do." I shook my head.

"You were scared. That's understandable. You said things you didn't mean." Zayn chimed in, a sympathetic look on his face. They all did. I've never broken down in front of them before. I've never broken down for a girl ever actually. This never happened to me. I was never sad when it didn't work out with a girl mostly because I knew there would always be more girls but there will never be another Katrina. I couldn't imagine feeling the way I did when I was with her with anyone else.

"I don't know how to fix it." I kept shaking my head. I didn't want to lose her despite what I said. I didn't know what I was saying. I was being stupid.

"Did you guys actually break up?" Louis asked.

"I don't know." I replied honestly. Who knew what she thought. I didn't even know.

"Then you still got her. You just have to make it up to her. Tell her you didn't mean what you said."

"Now?" I asked I disbelief. I was exhausted.

"No not now you idiot." Louis scoffed.

"Louis don't be an ass." Liam slapped the side of his head. "You have to think it through mate. This isn't just something you can apologize for and it'll all be fixed. She needs more than words."

I almost broke up with her obviously she needed more than an apology. She deserved more than an apology. She sure didn't deserve me.

"Then when?" I sniffled. I was beginning to calm down. Now I was just tired. I wanted to sleep.

"When you figure out what you want and what to say." Niall said. I just nodded and headed to my room without saying anything else. The boys didn't follow me. I tried to ignore the aching hole in my chest so I could sleep. Thankfully as soon as my head hit the pillow I was out.

The next morning, Louis came in quietly.

"Harry, you need to wake up."

"No." I mumbled, turning so my back faced him. I didn't want to think. I wanted to forget writhing that happens and the only way to do that was sleep.

"Harry it's 1 in the afternoon you've slept for ages." He poked me.

"Not long enough."

"Not long enough my ass. Harry get up, you can just lay here and pretend everything is ok because you're not."

"I know I'm not. I'm not pretending. I've acknowledged it. Now leave me alone." I waved my hand towards the door.

I heard him sigh, but he didn't move unfortunately.

"Did you think about what you're going to say?"

"I just woke up." I scoffed.

"Well then think because she's not going to wait forever. You only have a few days." His words didn't motivate me whatsoever. If anything I was losing hope. How could I make her stay when in a few days she was leaving?

"I could just leave her." I sat up. "I'd be doing us a favor. Our lives don't match up. I've got the tour and she has school.  I don't want to love her through a screen."

"Is it really what you want?"

I didn't know what I wanted. I shrugged in response.

"Figure it out before she leaves or life will make the decision for you."

I laid back down face first in my pillow and grunted.

"Get up we have interviews to get to."

Like always, we were taken to a building. That building had a room with one couch. I never understood why they would only give us one couch. Obviously we didn't fit and it was uncomfortable, but we never complained. We all sat down and answered the same 20 questions from 10 different interviewers. And every single one of them asked about Katrina.

"So how's Kat doing? Is she here today?"

I was caught by surprise. I almost forgot that we went public.

"Um, no not today." I tried to smile.

"Oh no, is she alright?"

"Yeah, she's just uhh, just out with her family. Didn't want her to be stuck listening to interviews all day. She had things to do anyways." I shrugged. I almost cringed at how bad that answer was. She had a life besides me. She didn't need me, but she was better with me and I was better with her.

We took a break from the interviews. We had some dinner with the crew and sat around in our dressing rooms until it was time to sit through the same questions from different people. I walked up to Louis, who was taking candy from a bowl on the table. He was such a child.

"How do I win her back?"

He dropped all the candy and turned to me.

"Hmmm, what?" He tried to look innocent.

I chuckled a little before replying, "how do I win her back?"

"You apologize."

"Then what?"

"I don't know."

"Thanks. That really helped."

Zayn walked up and grabbed a lollipop before turning to me.

"Like Liam said if all you have to offer is an apology you have to make it a damn good one. Write her a song. You're a musician, mate." He patted my back before walking away probably to go take a nap.

"Is that how he gets all the girls? He sings?" Louis' eyes went wide with realization.

"Well you've heard him sing. Who wouldn't fall for the guy?" I chuckled.

"Fuck you Zayn." Louis muttered.

"Heard that!" Zayn called out.

"I don't care!" Louis replied laughing.

What's gonna happen? I don't know.
What would you like to see happen?
Please comment and vote! Love you guys!