treat you better // pedri

fifty four

"When did you get here?" Pedri asks as he lifts his head and I wrap the blanket around myself tighter.

"Last night." I mumble.

"Really? I was so exhausted I didn't even know." He says as he begins stretching his arms and I bite the inside of my cheek.

"Exhausted with me, I know." I say under my breath as he immediately stops what he's doing.

"Who told you that?"

"You did." I say as he furrows his eyebrows.

"I did?" He questions as I nod.

"Sure did." I mumble as I get out of the bed, going over to the closet as I grab one of my own sweatshirts as I step back out.

"Mae." He says quietly as I shake my head.

"I should've just left last night but I decided to stay to see what you had to say about it." I say as he sits up, rubbing his face with his hands.

"What did I even say?" He asks as I lean against the doorframe of the closet.

"You said that you guys talked about me and then said it was about you being annoyed and frustrated. To be fair you never said exhausted but I put that together myself but it doesn't look like I'm wrong." I shrug as he sighs.

"What do you want me to say?" He questions as I cross my arms.

"Be honest with me, that's literally all I want. If I get offended then I'll be upset for like a day at most, I don't want to find out you're annoyed with me while you're half asleep." I say as he nods slightly.

"Solis," he says quietly as I raise my eyebrows and he blows out a breath, "I'm not annoyed with you necessarily, I just feel like my focus has been on your situation only and it's tiring me a little bit. But not because of your problems or because of you, it's the situation."

"Are you going to breakup with me?" I ask quietly as he stares at me blankly.

"I wouldn't break up with you, even if you got me to somehow hate you I still wouldn't break up with you." He says as I play with the charm on my bracelet.

"I'll stop talking about my situations for a while." I say as I walk out of his room and he immediately gets up, following behind me.

"Tell me your problems, I don't care, I just need time to recharge every once in a while, same like everyone else." He says as I look over my shoulder at him.

"Okay so I'll go home and you can be alone." I say as I grab my keys and phone off the counter.

"Not when you're mad." He says as he moves in front of the door, leaning against it.

"I'm not mad, Pedri." I say as I stand in front of him, setting my things back down.

"You're mad at me and I'm sorry." He says as he pulls the pocket of my sweatshirt, pulling me closer to him.

"I'm not mad." I mumble as he looks at my lips, shaking his head slightly, "I'm annoyed I didn't realize it was taking a toll on you, and I'm annoyed you didn't tell me that it was, and I'm annoyed that you told the guys before you told me, and I'm annoyed that you won't let me leave."

"That's a lot." He whispers as I roll my eyes, pulling away from him.

"Pedri, let me leave and then you can have time alone to recharge." I say as I look at the door handle and he shakes his head no with a grin.

"Nope we need to talk about it first."

"We did talk, so this is where you let me leave." I mumble as I reach for the handle and he immediately steps in front of it.

"We didn't talk about it enough because I need to explain and tell you what I told the guys." He says as I blow out a frustrated breath, going over to the couch and sitting down.

"Talk then." I say as I cross my legs and he sits on the opposite couch as I stare at him, "this sure does feel like a breakup."

"I'm not breaking up with you." He mumbles as he comes over to the couch I'm sitting on, turning so he's facing me, "just listen okay?"

"Mhmm." I hum.

"And don't feel bad about it, I just want to tell you rather than hearing it from somewhere else." He says as I nod, "I think a big thing that makes me have doubts is the fact you still haven't said you love me back, and I know you don't want to because then it gives me the opportunity to walk out, but you have to see it from my perspective. I don't want you to say it and not mean it so I'm not like pressuring you to say it, but it's making me question whether you actually feel it." He adds as I bite the inside of my cheek.

"I don't want to make you feel shitty." I whisper as he shakes his head.

"You don't make me feel shitty, I'm just frustrated that I can't sort things out, that's it. I'm not upset with you." He says as I frown.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think about how it'd make you feel after hearing all my problems, and especially with me not being able to say it back." I mumble as I lean over, wrapping my arms around him in a hug.

"Solis, it's okay. I don't want you to be mad at yourself about it, we're all human and sometimes don't know how to regulate our emotions." He whispers as he rubs my back.

"Is that all you talked about with the guys?" I question.

"Uhh," he pauses before taking a breath, "yep."

"Pedri." I say as I pull away from the hug, "what else?"

"Nothing to do with you, the next one is all me." He says as I raise my eyebrows.

"Well what was it?" I ask as he scratches the back of his neck.

"That I'm sexually frustrated." He says under his breath as I stare at him blankly.

"Speak up, I can't hear you." I say as he sighs.

"That I'm sexually frustrated." He says louder as I laugh slightly and he looks at my lips, "what's funny?"

"Nothing is funny." I shrug as he grabs my hand, pulling me onto his lap.

"What's funny?" He repeats as I rest my hands on his shoulders.

"Moral of the story is, you're horny?" I laugh as he frowns.

"Well I mean I didn't say that." He shrugs.

"That's what sexually frustrated is. Plus I was thinking about it the other day, like you're a guy so the fact you're still holding on is impressive. Having a girlfriend but not having sex is definitely not something that's easy." I say as I reposition on his lap and he immediately grips my waist.

"Okay fine, maybe I am." He says as I smile.

"I'll be ready at some point, no stress." I joke as I pat his shoulder and he leans his head back against the couch as he lets out a sigh.

"Yep that's fine." He mumbles as I lean forward, placing a kiss on his cheek.

"I'll leave you to it, I'm sure you'll be busy for a bit and then you can recharge or something else and then come over after training if you want that." I offer as I get off his lap.

"Sure, yeah." He says as I laugh, grabbing my keys and phone once again.

"Have a good time." I say as he looks back at me quick as I put on my shoes, stepping out of the house.

At least we're fine.