It's all about Her

The Price of Loving You...

After a few days of happiness, a moment came that made me realize something painful.

No matter how close we seemed, there was always someone standing between us.

Or maybe it was me standing between the two of you.

In truth, he was the one who truly owned your heart.

You could only ever be my friend, nothing more.

It was his birthday, the beginning of May, I think.

That day hit me hard, making me understand that we could never be together.

You know exactly what you did.

Do you remember the "close friend" story?

When I first noticed that I was on your close friends list on Instagram, I felt ecstatic.

For a brief moment, I thought maybe I held a special place in your heart.

But that happiness vanished in seconds.

The moment I opened your story, the joy turned into anger, sadness, hatred, and frustration.

Each slide of the birthday tribute you made for him felt like a dagger.

Photo after photo, I could feel the bond you shared, and with every image, I hated you more.

I recorded that story and still have the video saved.

Whenever I watch it, I force myself to relive that pain, hoping it will help me let go of you.

But no matter how many times I watch it, I can't seem to free myself from your grip.

You pushed me back to where I was a year ago-angry, lost, and broken.

Yes, I know I've always been a bit stubborn and dominant by nature.

But you, you made me dry, harsh, rude, and aggressive.

You gave me these anger issues. You're the reason I became this person.

It's just you. Only you.

You ruined my peace of mind and shattered the person I used to be.

" Sometimes I wish we had never met "

But at the same time, I know you're the only one who can heal me.

One glance from you, and all my anger melts away.

Even the smallest conversation with you makes me feel happy about the most trivial things.

Your presence alone fixes me.

When I meet your eyes, even in the worst moments, I feel calm.

But still, deep down, I know this was my fault.

My over-possessiveness destroyed everything.

I hated seeing you talk to him.

I got angry for reasons I had no right to be angry about.

I know how pathetic I sound.

I know you have your own life, your own choices.

And I know that if you reject me, it's probably for the best.

You never gave me false hope, never wasted my time, never played with my emotions.

It's just me-stupid, obsessed me-who failed to accept your decision.

I should have walked away and loved someone who could love me back.

I never wanted to beg for love, but I failed.

And yet, if I ever got another chance, I know one thing for sure:

"I would love to fall for you all over again."

This experience taught me what real love is.

Loving someone isn't about control or possession.

It's about learning to let go, even when it hurts.

The only way I feel I can truly love you now is to leave everything behind and die with this love inside me.

Maybe in another life, I will get to have you, completely, without barriers.

And until then, this love will live on in my heart, waiting for the next rebirth.

But in all this, I had lost myself-my true self.

I had become someone I never wanted to be:

The rude, arrogant, and insensitive guy.

And that's the price i had paid for loving you so hard...