My bully : My love || Luke Hemmings

chapter 15

* After a month *

Luke and I had been going out and things between us were going just well If I do say myself but we never labeled it , I've also been doing good in school Luke was helping me a lot especially in maths that I always considered it as a beast .

  "Oh c'mon Luke ! " I said irritated as he was taking me in to this place that's supposed to be a surprise , " But babe , If I tell you where we're going I'll ruined it he replied pleadingly , " fine by me " I shrugged , " Only you " he chulckled and I was lost again in his features as every time his facial expressions changes , I swear I can keep staring at him for the rest of my life happily , He was truly perfect in every way , But I didn't know how he felt about me , maybe I'm not good enough for him , Maybe he regrets asking me ... Only those simple thoughts made my head spin a lot and kept me up in many many nights .

because simply I fell in love with my bully  .

the feeling I got when he touched me or those butterflies I get when I hear his voice , or how it's imposdible to me to look into his eyes without getting lost , or how my heart races strangely fast when he gives me the simplest compliment ,
Luke Hemmings had a massive effect on me and it made me happy and scared at the same time .

" You alright there babe ?" He asked smirking noticing that I was staring obviously , I'm lucky I didn't drool though , "Yeah sorry " I blushed looking down at my hands embarassed " God you're adorable " He said a smile never leaving his face , and boy my heart beat .

  "And we're here ! " he anounced parking the car in a place that I regonised instantly frowning , It was that beach that I used to come to in my dark days , The exact same place where Luke hurt me .

  He saw my change in mood and said " Hazel I brought you here for a reason , I know it brings back a bad memory that my ass of a self made  , And which I hope and pray you forgive me for , but please follow me you won't regret it I promise " looking deep into my eyes " Ah .. I don't about you Luke " I said avoiding any more eye contact , " Please " he said squeezing my hand reassuringly " Ok " I sighed in defeat , He got out and opened my car door for me , Walked slowly in the dark until I saw somthing that made my heart flutter , It was a long path made with flower petals that led to a table that was set for two litten by two long candles " Oh my god Luke you really didn't ha-" , "No you deserve much more he said kissing my forhead lightly  we reached the table and Luke pulled the chair for me to sit on , He was being such a genteleman

After a few minutes of silence he spoke "Look since I saw you for the first time , I can't sleep properly .. what I mean is that you give me a headache " , "oh shit that sounded wrong " he said , "What I mean is that I think about you a lot , and I started having this feeling that I never had before .." , "I like you like .. a lot " My heart raced fast at that point , "Hazel I'm in love with you , you're everything that I want  " He confirmed breathlessly looking at me deep in the eyes .

I could've sworn that at that exact moment of time I almost had a heart attack just by the amount of emotions I felt , I felt happy yet nervous , beautiful yet insecure , After all he was Luke Hemmings .

   "Really ? "I asked automatically " definitely " He nodded , " Do you not have any feelings for me ? " he asked instantly , " I .. I don't know ..  No I don't" I answered , I was positive that I had feelings for him I was just scared , " You know you could've just told me , And we could've stopped going out , we're wasting both of our times " He looked upset at that moment

he stood up and walked towards the car "Come on we're leaving " he spat I could tell he was angry by the way he acted , I followed behind him quietly .

  He was driving dangerously fast and that scared me his jaw was clenched and his muscles were tensed , I looked at him " Can drive a little slower I'm kind of scared " I whispered the last part looking down at my hands , he laughed sarcastically " Do I look like I give a f*** ? "he answered me , "I should've known you were this bad of a bitch " He told me still concentrated on the road , I felt my heart hurt , I felt broken , I couldn't handle that , tears fell right away " stop the car here" I said quetly , "No " he answered simply " Stop the fucking car here " I snapped at him , " No ,NO NO NO keep your mouth shut your voice is annoying me  " He shouted back , I felt so vulnerable , I cried even harder " Fuck this " I said to myself but he heard it " No you know what fuck you , You don't deserve to be loved . " He stated , " I already know that ,but the thing that hurts the most is that I actually love you " I said getting out of the car as we reached my house , I took one last glance at him his features softened and he called my name numerous times as I ran towards my place utterly devestated , I got into my room and grabbed the first razor I found I could hear his footsteps towards my room that its door was locked  , "Open the door please Hazel " he said knocking , "Please I just want to talk to you " I wasn't even listening I just let razor make its way deep into my flesh , A few more cuts and I couldn't remeber a thing after that ..

Hey ! so yeah actually I am alive lol 
  I do not encourage self harm in any way , if you do suffer from it talk to anyone including myself , you are not in this by yourself .

next chapter is coming soon
big love
~Coco