You were everything...

Chapter 1.5

A sunny light in my room. Telling me to wake up. I get out of my bed and look where my bag is. I need it for school. It stands on the floor beside my table. I grab it and surch for my books.

It's perfectly packed. I pick it up and trow it into a corner of my room. I need clothes, clean ones. I open my drawer and surch for an hoodie and a jeans. The black one and the green hoodie look clean. I brush my hair and tie it up.

While brushing my teeth I hear my favourite songs to wake up. To fully wake up. I need to make myself breakfast for school.

In the kitchen I look around, not much to see. I open the fridge, also not much in there. While I grab the bread I make myself a coffee. Coffee is like my second love of life. Without it I would never survive.

Making my breakfast is nothing special but for me it's like a routine. A routine that is not that easy for me. I mean I need to get out of my bed early in the morning, making myself ready. I hate it.

Should I put on some makeup? I don't know maybe I would look more alive.

I put on some mascara and that's it. I don't have the time for more.
I grab my keys and put on my shoes.

Walking out of the house I still wear my headphones. The headphones I always wear. I could never life without them.

I am tired. Arrived at school I search for people I barely know. My body hurts.

First period I have Maths.
We got a new seat plan. I sit front row.
A boy named Joe and a girl named Cassie are sitting next to me. Cassie is really smart so I have no clue why she sits in front row. I barely know Joe. I just know that he is not an easy student, he is always loud and talked all the time.

My teacher starts to talk and I drift away in my head. After Maths I have a short break.

Mr. Dotros looks at me with his hopeless face. I nod and start writing down some answers that could be right but are probably wrong.

I hate school. One year ago I would say school is okay but now it's just a place I need to go. I need to learn. I need. I need. I need. But I just can't.

The teachers are always looking at me like I am a hopeless person with no clue of life.

I know what I have to do but I can't do it. I need to fight the monsters that are living in my head. Or maybe it's always a fight between me and myself.
And I already know who loses.

It's me.