After their entire speech, leaving Peter under the words, they left us alone for the rest of the day. Leaving me alone with a shell of a person that would not move from his kneeling position on the ground.
Peter was barely moving at all, I was terrified he wasn't even breathing. He sat impossibly still on the floor, his eyes locked onto a random spot on the floor. His knees must have been paining terribly from not moving at all, most likely red and tingling from lack of movement and circulation, but Peter didn't budge.
I kept on trying to call out to him, but Peter just isn't responding. All night I stayed up with him, trying to get his attention. When I nudged him, he would look up towards me, not making eye contact, but staring I think at my chin. But when I would try to talk after that, he would just look away and back down on the floor. And he never spoke at all.
A sharp shrilling noise ringing through the tiny cell indicated to me that it was morning and the two of us stayed up the entire night.
"James Buchanan Barnes, how was your night?" Dr. Miller asked upon entering the room. The doctor flicked his hand and had his lackeys untie the muzzle covering Peter's mouth. My heart ached at how red and sore the skin around it was.
"You asshole, what have you done to him? He didn't move, sleep, or talk the entire night! Undo this! What have you done?"
"Ah, but James Buchanan Barnes, that was what he was programmed to do. Follow all orders. And you, James Buchanan Barnes, handler of S-20 right here, have not given him the direct order to do so."
My brain short circuited for a second.
What?
Handler?
How can I be Peter's handler? That makes no sense? I too was just a tool for Hydra before. An Asset. How did I become his handler?
"Why do you keep on saying my full name?" I just asked dumbly, the heaviness of the questions making my lips feel numb and head heavy.
"Because, James Buchanan Barnes, Assets don't have names. Handlers do. We know everything about our tools and assets, but see how we make you submit to us? See how we reduce you to nothing else?"
His words infuriated me, but I took their frail and stupid plan as an opportunity for me to think of a plan to escape. Being Peter's handler means that I have full control over all his actions. If I can figure out a way to escape, I just need to tell him to follow me and he will do so. I know misusing someone to do my will is cruel — the kind of horrible thing Hydra does — but this is for both of our safeties.
"James, you're Peter's handler. Ask him what he did wrong," the doctor told me, breaking me away from my thoughts. A guard came up behind me and quickly locked a weird bracelet around my wrist. Shocked and confused, I stayed silent for a minute and was shown what the ugly bracelet does.
Send a small voltage up my arm, enough to cause severe pain but not too much to cause other damages.
Great.
So that means I do have to listen to them.
This was just a cruel game for them. Make me order around the young boy I loved as a son.
"Pe– Peter? Can you uh te–"
"The Asset does not respond to Peter. Call him by his proper designations," Dr. Miller informed me. Oh no. I knew where this was going.
"No! What, of course not! No! I refuse to call Peter anything like that! He is Peter!" I demanded, shouting out against the Hydra officials. Another jolt of electricity shot through my arm and Peter was sharply slapped across the face.
He did not flinch or move.
"Act out again and I'll double his punishment," Dr. Miller hissed, all traces of soft aggressiveness gone.
Pushing out air from my lungs and squeezing my eyes shut, forcing myself to get the courage to spit out the words.
"S-20," I called out, forcing myself to use the emotionless and firm voice I developed as the Winter Soldier. "Status Report."
"S-20 failed to follow direct orders," a small yet stoic voice announced. "S-20 attempted and succeeded to leave the Hydra facility and directly disobeyed orders. S-20 returned to Hydra sixteen hours and thirty-seven minutes ago and has been waiting for orders since then. Repeat rules. S-20 responds to the names of its designation and Asset and Boy. S-20 will not attempt to leave Hydra. S-20 follows all orders of higher officers and handlers. S-20 is loyal to Hydra and words for them only. S-20 will not flinch or move without being told to do so. S-20 will not talk unless asked a direct question. S-20 will not perform any self sufficient actions such as sleeping or eating unless directly told to do so."
Harsh memories and flashbacks circulated my mind of the little I remember when I was put under the words as the Winter Soldier. Yes, it was different, but yet so much as the same.
"S-20 failed to follow orders. S-20 made mistake. Punish S-20. As per rules, S-20 will get two lashes for each day S-20 left Hydra. S-20 left hydra for 19 days. 38 lashes are in order."
Hearing him beg for punishment made me want to both cry and pummel my fists in pure, white, hot rage into the doctor's face.
"You're the handler, James Buchanan Barnes. Complete the punishment," a soft sliver of a voice, just like a snake, slipped out from Dr. Miller. A whip was shoved into my hand and I could do nothing but stare in shock and disgust at what he expected me to do.
"What? No! Of course not. Why the fuck would I ever even do that?"
Of course my retaliations went in vain as a shock was delivered to Peter through the collar across his neck. His poor, small, still slightly malnourished body rattled from the voltage.
"S-20 flinched, going against the rules. S-20 deserves punishment. 5 more lashes due."
"What? Make this stop! Why is he talking like this! Stop!" I shouted over at the doctor. What? 5 extra lashes due?
"The asset is programmed to follow all rules of Hydra. You now owe 42 lashes. Keep rebelling and the number will only increase."
I stared in defeat at the whip in my hand.
This is not real. This is not real.
It will end soon.
I ran a mantra through my head. Forgive me one day, Peter.
I flicked my hand and let the whip strike through his back.
YOU ARE READING
Not Anymore
FanfictionS-20 has only ever known one thing, Hydra, until one man came into his life and showed him that there was so much more. That man was his first friend. His older brother. But after one night, the two were ripped apart and S-20 cannot even remember hi...
