Without You

34

The courthouse hallway buzzed with voices and footsteps, echoing off the cold, polished walls. I moved through the crowd in a daze, aware of the bodies around me, of my mom's hand on my arm, of my dad calling my name, but I kept walking, my eyes fixed straight ahead.

"Amore," my mom's voice was soft, pleading. I felt her hand grip my arm a little tighter. "Sweetheart, talk to us. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." The words left my mouth automatically, flat and distant. I didn't slow down, didn't look at her, just kept moving forward, my eyes unfocused, my pace steady.

"Amore!" Taylor's voice broke through the noise as she hurried up to me, concern etched across her face. She reached out, trying to catch my gaze. "Amore, hey. Look at me. Are you... Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine," I said again, my tone the same, empty and unchanging. I glanced at her only briefly, giving her a quick, dismissive nod before looking away, letting my expression settle back into a blank stare. She hesitated, her brow creasing, but I kept walking.

A few feet away, I caught sight of Adam. He stood by the exit, his face softening as I neared. He moved toward me, his gaze searching mine, and he reached out, gently placing a hand on my shoulder.

"Amore," he murmured. "Please, just talk to me. I know you must be feeling a lot right now, but I'm here. Whatever you're going through... I'm here."

I didn't respond. I kept my gaze steady, my face expressionless. "I'm fine," I said, my voice as hollow as before. I gave a slight shrug, stepping away from his hand without meeting his eyes, letting his hand fall back to his side. I didn't want comfort. I didn't want anything.

I felt their eyes on me—my parents, Taylor, Adam—as I walked a few steps farther down the hall, but I ignored them, my gaze fixed forward, the sounds around me fading to a dull hum.

Then, I saw him.

Azriel stood just down the hall, leaning against the wall, watching me, his face unreadable. For a brief moment, our eyes met. He didn't look away. I held his gaze, my face as still and stoic as stone. I let him look, let him search my expression, giving him nothing, not even a flicker of recognition or reaction.

After a few long seconds, I turned away from him, as though he were nothing more than a stranger in the crowd. I took a slow, deep breath, steadying myself, pressing down the emotions that threatened to rise, keeping my face smooth and blank.

Behind me, I could hear my mom's voice, a hint of worry threading through her tone. "Amore, please—just let us in. Don't shut us out."

"I'm fine," I said, again and again, as though repeating it would make it true. I kept walking, my face a mask, the weight of their stares trailing behind me, but I kept it all at bay, pressing everything down, until I felt... nothing.

The drive home was quiet, tense, filled only by the low hum of the car engine. I sat in the back seat, staring out the window, my head leaning against the cool glass. My parents' whispers floated from the front, soft and worried, but I didn't pay attention. My focus stayed on the passing streetlights, each one blurring as it whipped by.

When we pulled into the driveway, I opened the car door and stepped out without a word, walking straight toward the front door. My mom unlocked it quickly, and I slipped inside, heading straight for the stairs.

"Amore, honey," my mom called after me, her voice pleading. "Please, talk to us. We're here for you, okay? You don't have to go through this alone."

I paused, halfway up the stairs, keeping my back to them. "I'm good, Mom. Really." My voice came out flat, automatic. I glanced over my shoulder briefly, forcing a small smile that didn't reach my eyes. "I just... I just want to go to sleep."