BLOSSOMED | SEOKSOO FF ✔️

PART 08

Seokmin’s thought process was a chaotic storm of emotions, clashing and colliding in the same frame, refusing to settle into something coherent.

The bitter laugh escaped his lips before he even realized it. Fight? For what? The very idea seemed ridiculous to him. Fight for a life he had already destroyed? For a love he had tainted beyond repair? He couldn’t help but find it laughable, absurd even, that anyone thought there was still something salvageable in the mess he had become. His inner voice, dripping with mockery, whispered, Look at you, Seokmin. The tragic hero of your own pathetic story.

But the laughter died as quickly as it came, replaced by a hollow ache that settled deep in his chest. Beneath the sarcasm was a raw, unrelenting grief.

He didn’t want to laugh—he wanted to cry, to scream, to beg for forgiveness from the one person he had pushed so far away. Images of Jisoo flashed in his mind, not of the bruises or the tears, but of the moments before everything went wrong: the soft smiles, the gentle eyes, the trust that had been shattered beyond recognition. The ache deepened, threatening to pull him under.

Confusion crept in, weaving doubt into his thoughts. How had it come to this? How had he allowed himself to become the very monster he always promised he’d never be?

Seokmin’s mind raced, replaying every moment, every mistake, in agonizing detail. Each memory was a question he couldn't answer. Was it love? Was it obsession? Was I protecting him, or was I just controlling him? He rubbed his temples, his breath uneven, trying to make sense of the chaos swirling
inside.

The conflicting emotions were a whirlwind-he hated himself for what he had done but couldn't entirely let go of the belief that he had loved Jisoo in his own way.

Confusion quickly gave way to
anger, sharp and volatile. It surged
through him like wildfire, directed at
everything and nothing all at once.
At himself, for being weak.

At Jisoo, for leaving him when he felt so exposed.

At Jihoon, for taking his Jisoo away from him.

At Soonyoung, for standing there with that look of pity, like Seokmin was some lost cause.

His fists clenched at his sides, his
jaw tightening as rage consumed
him. "What do you know about my
pain?" he muttered under his breath.
His body trembled, not just with
anger but with the sheer effort it
took to contain it.

The anger wasn't just outward, it
turned inward, cutting him like
shards of glass. Why didn't I stop?
Why couldn't I control myself? He hit
his own chest as though punishing
himself would bring some sort of
clarity, some sort of penance for the
damage he had caused.

But as quickly as tne anger flared in, it fizzled out, leaving him empty and
exhausted. The reality of his situation settled over him like a suffocating weight. He looked around the room-the broken furniture, the empty bottles, the cold silence that had replaced the warmth Jisoo once brought.

This was his life now, and it was no one's fault but his own.

Seokmin slumped against the wall,
his body collapsing under the weight
of his realization.

He couldn't run from it anymore.

The monster he saw in the mirror was real.

And it was him.

No excuses, no justifications, just the cold, hard truth. He didn't know whether to laugh or cry, so he did both. A broken chuckle escaped his lips, quickly followed by a sob.

"Maybe I deserve this," he whispered,
his voice barely audible. "Maybe this
is all I'm good for."

For the first time, he allowed himself
to sit with the truth, to face the
wreckage of his actions without
deflecting, without denying. It
wasn't redemption, not yet. But it
was a start-a moment of brutal
honesty amidst the chaos. The road
ahead was uncertain, and he didn't
know if he had the strength to walk
it.

For the first time he was controlling his emotions rather than being controlled by them.

But as he sat there, lost in his
tangled thoughts, one thing became
painfully clear: he couldn't keep
living like this. Whether he chose to
fight or let himself drown, he had to
make a choice.

And for the first time in a long time, the decision felt like his to make.

I don't wanna cry for him but..
😭💀🙃