The White Rabbit

25.) Ugly Truth

I hear the front door begin to unlock but I am still sleeping and trying to pry myself awake. My head is pounding and I can feel the pressure pulsing within my head building as I open my eyes and the living room light beats down on me.
My cheeks feel tight and dry from the tears that dried there and my eyes are heavy. The weight of them coming down with each blink. I begin sitting up as Dean opens the door and I try my best to pull myself together before he sees me.

"Hey Audj, I'm back. Sorry I stayed a little later than I anticipated...it was a mess at the-" He explains as I hear his keys collide with the countertop.

"What's wrong?" He stops in his tracks putting down the rest of his belongings and coming over to me on the couch.

I shift and fidget on the couch trying to find the words to make this all go away but I can't. His soft caring presence melts me like butter and I can't hide this even if I wanted to. He deserves to know now even if I'm not at a place to handle telling him softly. Hard sobs erupt out of me as I spiral into a violent fit of emotion.

"Audrey...what's wrong...you're scaring me..."He gulps pulling my face up to his as I cry.

"Is the baby okay?" He panicsz

"I-I" Still sobbing I try to speak but my voice croaks and I cry some more.

"Audrey...I know you're struggling but can you at least nod to tell me if our son is okay..." His voice cracks with fear and he likely is coming up with a horrible reason for my crying in his head.

"He's...okay... I-I..." I hyperventilate out with sobs.

"Hey... just breathe okay." Dean says softly grabbing me and pulling me into his soft warm embrace and rubbing my back softly,

I continue to sob into his shirt leaving water stains behind. 

"Tyler came over..."I exhale out but can't continue with my unsteady breathing and tears.

"That fucker came into our apartment? What did he do?" Dean shoots straight up looking around for evidence of Tyler's visit.

"No...he didn't... do...do anything!" I hiccup waving Dean off from searching more.

Dean looking confused sits back down by my side holding me as I slowly control my tears and breathing.

"Audrey... what's wrong...what happened?" Dean whispers softly into my ear as my crying softens.

"I fucked up..." I exhale into his shoulder blade.

"Did you kiss him?" Dean asks brokenheartedly.

I jolt up and pierce my eyes into his worries hurt eyes. Somehow that manages to jolt me from my emotional basket case mess.

"No...no no no! God no! Dean...you are the one I love not him! I would never do anything to jeopardize that!" I exclaim watching the look on his face melt away.

"Then what happened? What happened to put you into such a state of duress?" Dean asks firmly.

I twiddle my thumbs trying to find the words before I speak.

"Tyler and I... before we broke up... I forgot that..." I stutter with a bunch of different segways.

"We slept together days before we broke up... I forgot about it because there was alot of alcohol involved and my memory of the event was cloudy... but we slept together." I spit out with tears welling in my eyes again and I bite my lip nervously drawing blood.

"Audrey that was before we even met! Why do you feel so guilty about that? He was your boyfriend at the time!" Dean laughs like I'm silly and kisses my head slowly dragging his hands down my arms then intertwines them into my hands.