𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 ✹ 𝐠. 𝐠𝐢𝐛𝐬𝐨𝐧

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐱𝐱𝐢 - 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐬

Haven

Neither my body or my brain realized what I was doing, or rather what my lips were doing, until it was already too late. His body was pressed to mine and the last thing I remember happening was him slipping his hand down my waist and whispering 'Good' before leaning his face so carefully and pressing his lips against mine. It was soft at first and it felt like he was waiting until I got used to the sensation of someone's lips in mine. Then he started moving his mouth and I wasn't sure what to do. Whoever said your body will just know what to do didn't know shit about life because I was quite literally winging it. My hands traveled up to thread on his hair which made him let out a little grunt into my lips and I'll take that as a sign he liked it. His hands were firm in my hips and he pushed me so my back was gently pressed against the wall.

Gerard pulled back and his hands were still clutching the skin on my hips. My hands were still up on his hair. I felt like I was on fire everywhere, goosebumps broke out on my skin and the look on his face made me want more. He opened his mouth to speak but I didn't let him because I pulled him down so his lips collided with mine again. This time it wasn't soft and gentle like the first time, it was like he was starving and my mouth was his only lifeline.

He was everywhere at the same time and whatever soft noises came out of me were muffled by his lips on mine. His hands cruised down to my thighs and without warning he pulled me up, suffocating a yelp with mouth. I couldn't breathe but at the same time I didn't care. If I died in his arms because of what we were doing right now I'd die a happy woman. His lips disconnected from mine and they went to leave soft kisses all over my neck and jawline. My hands were still tangled in his hair and I dug my nails in his scalp shutting my eyes closed hard.

"God fuck you smell so good" He praised with a hoarse voice and I tightened my legs around his waist. His mouth returned to mine in no time and I felt like I was getting the hang of how to do this. He wasn't totally dominating me anymore, I was actually moving in sync with him. "Am I doing this okay?" I whispered between pants and needy touches.

"Yeah you're amazing, keep doing what you're doing" He murmured, returning his lips to mine. I was on cloud 9. And then what I was doing hit me like a bucket of water. I was kissing Gerard, he was my first kiss and Jesus it felt amazing.

Life isn't perfect so obviously a drunken guy had to stumble by us breaking the moment and making gerard look over his shoulder at the guy giving him a sloppy and very sad attempt of a thumbs up "Yeah you get it lad" He slurred before stumbling past and almost falling face first into the hardwood floor. He slowly turned to look back at me. His pupils were dilated, hair a mess and lips swollen because of me, accompanied by the smallest hint of my lipstick on them.

He was quiet for a while just staring at me with aglint behind his eyes and I couldn't take the poor communication so I had to speak. "You're the best first kiss I could've asked for" I whisper out which made him smile and place a small peck to my lips.

"Glad you feel that way love" His voice was a deep rumble which sent me straight into a system malfunction. Slowly and surely he placed me back to the ground and looked into the hall before looking back at me all while my face felt on fire. "You're blushing" He pointed out which made him earn an unamused expression accompanied by a raised brow.

"I know, and your hair is a mess" I replied.

"Yeah and whose fault is that?" He snorted a laugh and ran a hand through his messy hair trying to fix it but only making it worse.

"Wait wait wait" I murmured, bringing my own hands up to his hair and fixing it myself because I could actually see what I was doing. He closed his eyes for a moment and I noticed his jaw clench and unclench for a second before opening them back up and staring right into my soul. "There, I made you handsome again" I teased, bringing my hands to my sides and fixing my dress that had ridden up from when he carried me. His eyes shot to my thighs and when I was done fixing he looked back at me. "Do you want to get back out there?" He asked, offering me his hand. I took it in mine and in exactly five seconds his hand changed from mine to the small of my back as he guided me around back to the filled room.

Everyone stared. And when I say everyone, I really mean everyone. I moved closer to Gerard as we walked and looked up at him to find him with an unmoving expression. We made a quick stop by the kitchen and I stood next to him as he took a beer out of the fridge like it was his house and then leaned against a counter. His hand moved from my waist to my shoulder when one of his rugby friends from another school approached us. He was talking to Gerard about something and I was half listening and not really listening. All I could focus on were the small circles his thumb rubbed on my bare skin and how I could smell his cologne from where I stood. The guy left and he looked down at me. "All good?" He asked and I nodded. He leaned down and pressed a kiss on top of my head and my stomach did a little flip.

This felt unreal and amidst the loud music around me and how I felt pressed to the side of the guy I've liked for ages I was trying to process all my emotions. Everything that had happened in the last maybe thirty minutes was so wrong. I knew it, Gerard knew it. But it felt as if we both collectively decided to ignore the world for a bit, ignore the fact people could see him whispering into my ear and us laughing, ignore the tiny kisses he pressed to my shoulder and head, ignore the fact that right outside this kitchen filled to the brim with drunk teenagers my brother was oblivious to what I had just done with his best friend.

I allowed myself the pleasure of imagining what life could be like if my circumstance was different. Maybe if I wasn't born a Kavanagh Gerard would be like this with me in this same kitchen and he would parade me around and show me as his girl. I thought about that the whole night and when I went home and my head hit the pillows, I fell asleep to the remembrance of his lips on mine.

And it was wonderful. 

✹✹✹

author's note;
hi loves! I hope you didn't mind the nice little cliffhanger I left on chapter 19, but at last here's the continuation of their first kiss. I love these two so so much they literally have my heart. 

thanks so much for reading and don't forget to comment and vote!

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