A Specific Butterfly | ShinoGiyuu 🦋🌊

Poison

Shinobu POV

I couldn't sleep. How could I? Can you even blame me? Do you even have the right to blame me anyway?

This whole situation was so confusing. It all hurt my head and my health, both at once.

But I'm not going to let that stop me, I won't let it ruin my plans. I have to continue and carry out this plan, shouldn't I?

If I can't get rid of these feelings, then I suppose they'll go away alongside this plan. It's perfect, isn't it?

Besides, I didn't have a mission today. I couldn't just sit around in bed all day, crying over some stupid emotions. No way I'll let that stop me.

I made sure to eat beforehand, so Aoi didn't bug me about eating. Well, I did pretty much eat a bit, I guess.

But ever since my appearance changed, she has been very wary of me. I'm not sure, I think the tint in my skin has decreased, so I'm more paler, at least, that's what she told me.

I walked over to my desk, I sat down before examining the items that lay on my desk.

I didn't really have time to clean up, I mean, I wasn't in the estate these days. Well, let me think.

1. I was talking with mitsuri
2. Me and tomioka had a talk together
3. Mitsuri hosted a sleepover

And lastly, I finally returned when I went to visit her.

I guess I didn't really have enough time to process what happened yesterday. I just kind of blurted out how I felt to mitsuri.

I don't know how to feel. Me, being immature before my plan takes action? I deserve to be punished for such behaviour.

But, kanae will help me. Won't she? She guides me every day, telling me what to do and say.

But anyway. I need to focus.

I looked at the jars that stared back at me, sitting on my desk. I think I should mix these two. Yes. That would make a perfect poison, wouldn't it?

I hope. I do hope this plan works. I at least want to help out everyone else before I do leave. I don't want to leave this earth, known as 'The Useless Hashira', do I? Obviously not. So that's why I need this plan to work. Otherwise, I'd be too weak to even be a hashira.

It's been a few hours. I think. I haven't really checked properly, nor have I left my room. I've just been here, inspecting this poison, making sure it was perfect. It has to be. Nothing will go wrong with this plan intact.

A light knock was on my door before I knew it. I immediately spun myself to face it before sighing. "Come in." I said, letting the other person know I was actually busy.

"Kocho-sama?" Aoi said as the door creaked open. Ah. It was just aoi!

"Yes, Aoi-san?" I said, walking over to her. She looked up at me as sweat trickled down her soft skin that sat on her face. What was wrong?

"Well, dinner is ready, so I wanted you to come to the dining hall, please." She said as she bowed politely.

Dinner? Already? I must have been in there for a while, huh. Well, I guess some dinner won't be bad.

I nodded, "Okay. Thank you for informing me, Aoi-San." I said, ruffling her hair softly as she smiled.

"I'll call you when it's ready." She said, bowing then leaving.

I closed the door as I sighed, leaning against it.

Is this the right decision? Will it be anyway? I'm sure it is. Right? I'm obviously helping everyone, aren't I? Right, nee-san? ...Right..?