I wish that I could wake up with Amnesia...

14 - Sorry

We were told to continue life like nothing happened. Gally ordered everyone to get back to work, especially me. "Now he's back, he's shucking alive, so you can shucking work you slinthead," Gally had told me.

While working in the gardens, Newt casually came over to where I was and worked beside me. We weren't supposed to really talk to each other, but if it looked like we were working while talking, it would be okay - at least in Gally's eyes. "Luke's going to be okay."

I shook my head, rolling my eyes. "Shuck, Newt."

"No, Clint told me. But they have their hands full - I mean, that new girl is in a coma. And then Alby's still going through the Changing."

"What are you saying?" I asked.

"I'm saying...Clint asked me if you would be wiling to help the Med-Jacks with Luke."

I stabbed the soil with my shovel. "Are you shucking me, Newt? I don't really want to be around a slinthead who thought it was a great idea to go into the Maze. I mean, that broke one of the only rules. How hard is it to remember three shucking rules?"

"You did nothing to stop him," Newt said. I knew he was referring to the kiss. I looked away and started working again. Newt came closer to me, setting his hand on my arm so I'd look at him. "Listen, we have enough help over here. You can help the Med-Jacks."

"Fine." I threw my shovel onto the ground and walked to the Homestead, to the room of the Med-Jacks. I figured I should probably attempt to change my attitude before going into the room, but shrugging it off, I walked in. "Newt said you needed help."

"Hey, yeah. We really don't have a lot of time to help Luke, so we were wondering if you could," Clint said. "He's going to need a lot of help with physical therapy, basically getting better and independent again. He has his own room now to recover, so you can go in now. First see how he's doing."

I nodded, and walked into his room. "Luke?" I asked as I walked through the doorway. He was lying in bed. He had scratches and scrapes all over his body, some that weren't even taken care of. I was no Med-Jack, but I knew if they weren't taken care of soon, they could get infected. He opened his eyes to see me just standing awkwardly.

"Jen," he said in a raspy voice. He sounded awful. He looked awful.

"Oh shuck," I said, rushing to him. Why did I all of a sudden care for him? "Do you need water? Anything? Just tell me."

"Water sounds nice," he said, still not in his full voice. 

There was a bucket of fresh water on a table and I poured some into a glass, and gave it to him, which he slowly drank. "Thank you," he said. 

"I'm going to clean your scrapes," I said. "Maybe while I'm doing that you can tell me what happened in there."

"Yeah, if you first tell me why you're helping me when you're not a Med-Jack, and what all the commotion was about earlier. Something happened, I know it. And it wasn't anything good."

"The Med-Jacks have their hands full today," I said simply. I grabbed a cloth and dipped it in water and started cleaning the first wound. His face immediately twisted up in pain. 

"Just shucking tell me, Jen."

I rolled my eyes, continuing cleaning the wound with water. "The Box came up. Everyone thought it was another person from your stupid band-"

"Well, already that doesn't make sense. Michael came days ago. If we had another band mate, which we don't, they would have come the day after Michael," Luke said.

I shook my head in irritation. "Anyway, it was actually a girl. And she didn't seem alive until she shot up and said Thomas's name, then fell down again. She's in a coma."

Luke made a face. "That's odd," he said. "Maybe she thought Thomas looked familiar - like you and me, for instance."

I exhaled, and began to not care if I was hurting Luke by putting cream on his wounds. Obviously it stung, because once I applied it, Luke tensed up and grabbed my arm. "Thomas was in the Slammer at the time."

"You're not going to put that stuff on every shucking scrape, are you?"

"I don't know, I might." A smile formed on my face. "That was only a small one. Wait until I get to one of the big ones. You know, some of these are pretty deep."

"How can you just watch me in pain?"

I dipped the cloth in water again and began cleaning the next one. "How can you just go into the Maze?"

"I had to, Jen."

"No, you didn't. And you shucking promised. So I don't really care if I hurt you if I do this." I applied the cream and watched Luke's eyes squeeze shut as he winced in pain. He grabbed my hand and squeezed it. I pulled away. "No. You don't get to squeeze my hand. Nope."

I continued on, and Luke was breathing heavy from holding his breath from the pain. "I'm sorry I broke my promise."

"Luke, if you keep holding your breath while you're in pain, you might faint. I'm not technically a Med-Jack, so I don't know what to do in that situation. Also, I'm not a Runner, so I'm not running to get help."

Luke abruptly grabbed my arm so I'd look at him. "Jen. I am so sorry. And I wish sorry could fix everything, I really wish it could."

"You're just saying that because you broke your shucking leg. You don't realize how you hurt me. I mean, do you even know I spent the day in the Slammer? Shuck, I'd still be in there right now if Gally hadn't interrogated me. Which, I told him everything. So when you've recovered a little, I'd expect a visit from Gally if I were you."

"You really think Gally will put me in the Slammer while I'm recovering?"

"I think Gally could shucking banish you while recovering. You're not exempt from any form of punishment just because you're not well. That's like saying we weren't going to banish Ben because he got stung."

"Who's Ben?"

"I never knew him personally. He got banished for trying to kill Thomas a while before I came."

"Oh."

I shook my head. Luke didn't seem to care that because of him, I was put in the Slammer. It made me mad, so again, I felt no guilt for putting Luke in more physical pain. I moved onto a larger cut, that already seemed to be getting infected. It was on his arm. "Jen, no. Please. That one's going to hurt."

"Just keep breathing, okay?" I said. I began cleaning the cut, and he slipped his hand into mine and squeezed it. I rolled my eyes, but it was helpful to steady his arm while I cleaned the cut. "Did you at least find anything out there?" I asked.

"No."

I exhaled.

"Jen." He was looking at me as I looked at him. His blue eyes looked serious, and his face sincere. "I am so sorry I broke my promise, and that I even told you. Because by telling you, I got you in trouble."

"Actually, I would have been in the Slammer if you didn't tell me anything."

"Okay, so I'll rephrase that - I'm so sorry that I went into the Maze. Because the pain I caused you hurts more to see than the pain I'm going through right now."

That line should have had me laughing. It was way too cheesy, and way too abrupt. But somehow inside I immediately felt forgiveness towards him as I looked into his calm eyes. I didn't even realize that I was slowly leaning in until I saw his eyes close as his lips pressed against mine. I was kissing Luke - and it didn't even feel wrong. 

Until the door opened.

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A/N:

I haven't updated in over a week because I was gone for camp and then I had writer's block when i came back..i think i'm good now

But 5 Seconds of Summer's new song....whaattttttttt i love it, like Luke's swearing came out of nowhere and I was not ready for it but it's a good jam

and I'm still recovering over page 250 of the Death Cure. like I picked it up months ago and read that page but it didn't hurt as much as reading up to it.