My Journey Through Self Love

Chapter 16 - Limiting Belief 4 - I Can't Heal

Limiting Belief: I believe I can't heal because I keep hurting from the wounds of both my past and my present.

As I've mentioned before, I've been through a lot. It's been easy for me to believe that I can't heal because I was always finding myself going in and out of feeling depression.

I'm super aware of all my flaws, all my limiting beliefs, and all my trauma responses, but I still found myself either focusing in on my flaws, believing a lot of terrible lies about myself (and my worth), or responding to situations with my ego self as opposed to higher self. I would be so frustrated with myself that I couldn't get over my traumas and my fears, especially after years and years of dealing with them. And this frustration caused me to beat myself up even more, further making me depressed.

It was an endless loop I didn't know how to escape from. And it felt like I would be trapped there forever, which prompted me having a lot of suicidal thoughts.

Flipping the Script: I CAN HEAL from my past hurts.

The truth is, Healing is a PROCESS, NOT a destination. This means that the process of healing is only going to CONTINUE, and it's never full "done" because emotional wounds often have multiple layers to them. As one layer heals, I may uncover another layer that I need to process and work through. Also, as I go through different stages of life, I may trigger old wounds in different ways, which may require further healing.

There's a lot that I went through as a child and it's impossible for me to completely erase all of it and pretend that the pain doesn't exist. Healing is about learning to live with the pain in a way where it doesn't control me. So it's important for me to acknowledge the pain I have but also process and release that pain so that it no longer affects me as much in the future.

The Three Steps to Healing:

1) Understanding the pain:
- identifying (and validating) the emotions I feel and the experiences that caused them
- acknowledging how those emotions and experiences affect how I view myself and my relationships

2) Processing the pain:
- sitting with the emotion, no matter how long it takes (letting myself cry it out, talk it out, journal it out, etc.)

3) Releasing the pain:
- letting go of the emotional weight and forgiving myself (and others)
- realizing the limiting beliefs that were holding me back
- reframing those limiting beliefs into affirmations
- focusing on the now and how I can move forward (no longer holding onto the past)

Overtime, I WILL feel less triggered by my past experiences and be able to reflect on my pain without being overwhelmed by it. I WILL find peace in accepting what happened without being consumed by it. And I WILL be able to approach life with more hope, self-compassion, and trust in myself.