Walk Away | Danny O'Donoghue FanFiction

12. Ella

Sometimes I felt like I had feelings for Danny. Those were moments of weakness though, and I'd firmly tell myself that I didn't feel that way about Danny whatsoever. Hearing Danny tell me that he had, in actual fact, always liked me was extremely pleasing to hear but he was drunk and he was still Layla's boyfriend. Layla still deserved to have the benefit of the doubt about this cheating thing and Danny was probably on the rebound, thinking he felt something for me just because he'd been hurt by Layla.

Even if Layla had cheated on him and he still had any genuine interest in me that wasn't a result of him being on the rebound, I couldn't be with him because Layla was my friend and friends exes were off-limits, and if I was to become Danny's girlfriend then I'd be breaking girl code, everyone would hear that I was that person who stole her friends ex and I would be hated beyond belief.

What was I doing?! I shouldn't even be considering what would happen to me if I started dating Danny because I just couldn't date him, even if I wanted to.

Despite Danny being drunk tonight, he had been perfect. The way he called me 'Els baby' when he greeted me, the way he called me his girl, the way he said he cared about me more than he cared about Layla.

No, Ella! Get these stupid thoughts out of your head!

I felt so ashamed, I felt like a desperate whore who couldn't get her own boyfriend so she went after her friend's boyfriend instead. I just couldn't help it, Danny was special and he made me feel special. I couldn't help that I was falling for someone who I wasn't supposed to be falling for. If I could stop these feelings then I would because right now I was being a poor excuse of a friend to Layla, because whether or not she had cheated on Danny was between the two of them and I would most likely still be her friend even if she had cheated and they broke up, because that's the way things were and that's the way things had to be. I'd still remain friends with Danny too, if he wanted to. I couldn't imagine him wanting to have a mutual friend with his cheating ex-girlfriend.

Why did things have to be so confusing? So complicated? Why couldn't Danny have met me before Layla? Why couldn't he have just been friends with Layla when they met, then she'd introduce him to me and I could've started dating him instead of her? Why was I even thinking like this?

Maybe I just shouldn't be friends with Danny. Maybe he's not good for me because I have feelings for him. But who was I kidding? Danny was the best thing that had ever happened to me, not because I liked him but, because in the few, short months that we'd been friends, not only myself but everyone around me had noticed how much happier I'd become, how confident and enlightened I was. A few people had noticed it was Danny who did this to me. A few of mine and Layla's friends who had met Danny had commented on how, since we'd become friends, I'd changed for the better. I always felt guilty when this was said though, because Danny was Layla's boyfriend so he should be having a lasting impact on her rather than on myself.

I had to forget about these feelings! Forget about seeing Danny in this way! Maybe I should take some time out to focus on myself instead of Danny or Layla. I could go to one of those bullshit hippie retreats to learn new things about myself, or take classes doing something new, or change my look, or look for my dream job. Some of these things sounded extremely promising, and I knew that focusing my time on achieving and doing these things would definitely keep my mind away from seeing Danny in a romantic sense. If I was focusing my time on those things it meant that I could still be there for Danny when Layla told him exactly if she was cheating on him or not, but not let my feelings for him grow bigger. This sounded like the perfect plan, and I knew exactly what thing from my list I wanted to focus on! I needed to chase my dream job. To become a professional photographer.

I was interrupted from my empowering career thoughts by the ringing of my phone, it was Layla. On one hand I was surprised, she hadn't been able to answer the phone to Danny for a long while because she had obviously been with her other guy and possibly still was, but I also wasn't surprised to be receiving a call from her since I'd told Danny that she wasn't with me tonight.

I answered the phone, holding it to my ear, "Hello?"

"What the fuck is wrong with you! You're always trying to ruin my relationship with Danny!"

I let out a long sigh, I guess Layla hadn't grown out of her childish ways. "I don't need to try and ruin something that you already ruined by cheating on him" I tell her, outraged at the way she's speaking to me when I'd never do anything to jeopardise their relationship despite how I felt about Danny, and when she knew perfectly well that I'd been cheated on

"You don't know anything! Face it Isabella, you're a stupid whore who's too scared to settle down just because your ex boyfriend had an affair and you don't want it to happen again, so you just find random guys in clubs to make you feel wanted" the words that she spat out through gritted teeth hit me like daggers, piercing straight through the thick skin that I had built up which was resilient to harsh comments and stabbing me in the heart, right where it hurt. I couldn't listen to the toxic words from my toxic friend in our toxic friendship, I hung up before she could say any more and before I could show her just how much her words had gotten to me.

I erupted into tears, everything Layla said to me had been entirely true. She might have worded it barbarically but she'd been right about me.

Hello everyone! It's taken me long enough but this chapter is finally here! I've been writing it for over a week because although I'd planned it before, I was never happy with how I wrote this chapter and I was too busy to write it properly! So here it is, I still don't think I'm 100% happy with it but I don't think I ever will be. The next chapters will be updated a lot faster than this as although I still have a lot of commitments in my personal life at the moment, things have relaxed and aren't as hectic anymore!
Love, Amelia X