After September 23rd

Mikaela's Memory Fragment

"Sweetest Joy"

"Mikaela... Mikaela?"

I fixed my ducks to be perfectly aligned with the other. I was now in the third row. The toys in the doctor's office were not as pretty as the ones in my bedroom. The books in his office were also very dull... no vampires or zombies, only drawings, about a mouse with a cookie.

"Mikaela! Mikaela Regina --------!"

"What I'm hearing and seeing is that Mikaela isn't responding to her name and hasn't spoken yet?"

"Yes, she's turning four in a few months. Her nanny recommended I place her in a daycare to help with her social skills and speaking, but she hasn't uttered a word to the other children; she kind of isolates herself,"

"As her father, has she said any normal words, for example, dad, mom?"

"No... she doesn't even look at me...or hugs me... nothing,"

I placed the last duck from the box in the penultimate space. I stared at the empty space. The number was uneven.

"We'll have to run more tests, but there is a high chance that Mikaela is autistic. Mr. ---------, does Mikaela have any family members who may be autistic?"

"Yes, her mother and her uncle are on the spectrum,"

I grabbed the box of ducks and threw it at the ducks, destroying my perfectly aligned ducks. I walked to the door and tiptoed to reach the doorknob.

"Mikaela?"

I moved my hand away when my father tried to grab it. I went back to the ducks and picked the first one that caught my attention, placing it down.

"Thank you for your time, doctor,"

My father gently picked me up, taking me away from the ducks. We drove back home, and he dismissed my nanny for the day. I walked to my playroom, where my toys were waiting for me.

"Wait for me, Mika,"

I sat down and grabbed my building blocks. I separated the blues from the reds; all the building blocks had their own pile. I wiggled around as my father attempted to remove my jacket.

"Hold still, sweetie, aren't you warm in that?"

I continued to play once he removed my jacket and my shoes.

"Mika? Sweetie, can you look at me? Please?"

He lay down, and his arm hit my blocks. I moved it away and fixed the green pile.

"Of course..."

I stared at my organized blocks and went to play with the pile of books in my playroom.

"Do you want me to read a book to you?"

I grabbed the book that taught me my colors; I reread it and smiled when I landed on the color blue.

"Mikaela?"

A blue dinosaur peeked on top of my book. I looked up and saw my father's brown eyes.

"Here, baby, an early birthday gift,"

"Blue!" I smiled as I dropped my book.

"What...?"

He stood up and didn't let go of my toy. I stood up as well and jumped to get it.

"Yes! It's blue! It's blue!" He smiled and his voice sounded different, "What animal is it? Do you know? Can you say it? What animal?"

I grabbed another book and looked for a page with a picture of a dinosaur.

"Dinosaur!" I spoke.

"Mm! It's a dinosaur!" My father cried and knelt. He gave me my toy and hugged me tightly, "Oh my girl, my sweetest joy,"

I wiggled around trying to release myself.

"Now, say papa, and I'll buy you anything blue,"

I continued to wiggle around and hit his chest. He let go and gave me a quick peck on the forehead that I quickly wiped away.

"Okay, one step at a time," He smiled, "Thank you, Mika,"

I sat down and placed my dinosaur on my lap while I read my book, and showed him the color blue.