Doubts - Regretful ex-Fiancé

Final Chapter | ✓

I was cradling my little baby in my arms. Remi. Beautiful, loved, cherished Remi.

At just two years old, he had golden hair and eyes that sparkled like autumn leaves, just like his dad. He resembled a tiny version of him, especially in the way he sat and rubbed his eyes and when he smiled and asked for his food. He was a mini version of his papa. Right now, he was sleeping soundly as I gently rocked him back and forth, singing a soft lullaby. Remi might never fully grasp the depth of our love for him or understand why he was so cherished. But we would always strive to show him and his little siblings that they were deeply loved and treasured and that mommy and daddy would always be there for them. 

I found out I was pregnant with him during our first year of marriage. Jonathan almost overflowed with happiness. He knelt down in front of my belly, showering it with kisses and hugs, making promises to our son that he would never experience loneliness, hunger, or despair. The depth of his emotions brought tears to my eyes. Jonathan understood how crucial it was for me to feel secure and to know that our child would always be cared for. He set up a bank account and a trust fund for the baby even before he took his first breath. When our little one finally arrived, it felt like a precious gift, a reassurance that everything would turn out just fine.

My mother received a visit from my husband shortly after we returned from our honeymoon. They discussed Lilian, the wedding, and everything else, but she seemed indifferent. She showed no interest in where Lilian was buried and didn't even congratulate us on our marriage. Instead, she asked for money and insisted that Jonathan come inside for a drink. She was wearing a bra and tiny shorts. Jonathan turned his back and left. We never saw her again after that. 

The threat against us was neutralized when one of the surviving attackers confessed. They were part of a group that operated online, trafficking people, especially women, little children, and girls. Over 40 places, between apartments and offices, were searched, and many arrests were made. It seemed like everything would be okay, but they still tried to hurt us once again. What they didn't realize was that the man in the house was armed and had a wife and maybe a child inside her. They took the risk as they went through the barrier and the signs Jonathan had put up at the entrance. That's when it all unfolded. Before they could even park and exit the car, we fired the first shot.

It happened four months after our wedding. No one exited the vehicle after, and Jonathan insisted that I stay inside and not come out until he said it was safe.

The police showed up in 30 minutes, and they towed the car away. Nobody would tell me what happened exactly. I could only imagine. After that, we were not bothered again, and 15 people, including the dealers, some buyers, and bosses, were sent to prison for trafficking, attempted murder, kidnapping, assault, and a lot more.

Our life became peaceful. Happy. Content. At times, I couldn't tell if I was asleep or awake, if it was all a dream, or if I truly had a baby and a husband beside me each night. But when my Remi cried for his nap, I knew I was really there. Everything was real, and I had finally escaped that ocean of sadness and fear. I couldn't recall the last time I felt scared or hungry that I doubted my own strength. Jonathan was there for me for everything I needed help with.

Now, my focus was on my little one, the chores around the house - even though I had a housekeeper now, and the love from my husband, who looked at me and our son with disbelief at what we had achieved. In the end, love triumphed over all the hardships we faced.

Sometimes, I reflected on everything that led me to this point. I remembered that afternoon when Jonathan came home and said such hurtful things to me. I thought it was the end, that I could never forgive him, that it was too much, and he had let me down in an irreparable way. I didn't believe I could look at him again without feeling hatred or wanting him to leave. For a time, that was my reality.

Everything felt so distant now like it was all far away from us. We had been so happy together; it felt like a dream. My baby was a sign that second chances could happen.

As for Samuel, he pleaded with Jonathan for a chance to see me. He even caused a scene outside the restaurant, kneeling, crying, and asking for forgiveness. Jonathan kept quiet for a while but eventually told me he had hit his brother again a few days earlier.

When I heard that, I knew we needed to take action. I can't say I fully forgave Samuel, but he showed regret and had started some therapy after everything. I also didn't want my children to miss out on family because of past issues.

Then, on a lovely Sunday afternoon, while I was seven months pregnant with Remi, I invited Samuel into our home. Jonathan stood beside me, grumbling like a lion with a hurt paw. Samuel looked frail and unwell, far from the strong man he used to be. I felt pity for him and asked him to sit next to me. He brought flowers and a gift for the baby.

From that moment, we began to mend things. It took time for me to feel comfortable laughing around him again, but eventually, I was glad to see the four brothers together, enjoying a barbecue at our home, chatting about the restaurant, football, and how beautiful our house, built by my husband, had become.

Now, I sat on our porch with the sleeping baby. Jonathan was trimming our little tree, the one we had planted together years ago. It had grown nicely, full of flowers. Remi's swing was set up, along with a small house for our dog and a playpen for the chickens. Jonathan finished his work and wiped his forehead with a handkerchief. He was shirtless. I certainly wasn't going to complain about that.

He walked over to me with a smile. "How are my loves?" He paused near my rocking chair and kissed me on the lips, gently stroking our baby's little head.

"Everything's okay. Remi finally fell asleep." He seemed a bit upset that we didn't let him ride the dog all day like he wanted. After some fussing, he finally slept, exhausted.

"Yeah, that I can see. How about we put him in the crib?" I got up and placed Remi in the crib we had downstairs. Jonathan immediately wrapped his arms around me, my back pressed against his chest and kissed my neck affectionately.

"How about a second baby?" he suggested, playfully touching my belly.

"He's barely two years old!" I said, scrunching my face in disbelief. 

"It's good for them to be close in age... you know how important it is for siblings to be near in age. Please?" he asked with a husky voice, kissing my neck and making me laugh.

"I will think about that..." 

He grunted displeased, pulling me onto his lap as he sat on the sofa. "I love you, Isabella... I love you and our son. I will love all the children you give me, forever. My love... thank you so much," he kissed me, and I felt those words sink deep within me.

I love you, Jonathan. I'm not afraid. I trust you.

Authors Note: Please, write your final comments on this story. Thanks.

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